Accidents - What have you broken and how?

Most serious? Most funny?

121 to 140 of 150 messages
18/11/2007 at 18:59
MY LIST IS DEFFFFF THE BEST....... do i get a prize????????
18/11/2007 at 22:33

do i get a prize????????

Blacklisting from insurance companies. I will update the "secret database" on you tomorrow at work. who says we have no fun in the insurance world!

18/11/2007 at 22:38
I once ran myself over with my very own car. That was quite spectacular - and I managed to do £3,000 worth of damage to a neighbour's car in the process. The funny thing (in retrospect - not at the time) was, that she had moved her car because she was having furniture delivered - then my car drove itself into her 'safely' parked car and ran me over in the process. I can laugh about it now but it was an awful shock at the time.
18/11/2007 at 22:44
Minty did you use to be in E17?
19/11/2007 at 00:05

I was still laughing over the 'burned forehead from falling on the heated towel rail whilst putting knickers on in the bathroom', when I saw the one about trapping the dog's ear in the boot door; now I'm crying laughing.

My best are:

* My best friend, when I was three, and I were racing each other down our street, me on my tricycle and he on his go-cart. He (typical bloke!) cut me up and I had to turn into my drive at high speed. Tricycles don't turn well at fast speeds, and I went straight into the fence, which was one of those ones with sharp stones. Knocked myself out and had to have 15 stitches in my cheek.

* When I was about 9, my best friend and I were playing football and I got shouted in. It was my ball, so I picked it up, at the same time as he kicked it. Cue broken finger, although I only realised the next morning. I got all excited thinking I was going to have a cast, only for them to strap it to the next finger. Grrrr...

* Whilst swinging my sister around the kitchen as we were both attached to opposite ends of a scarf, she slipped and hit the fridge, knocking out three of her front teeth. They were baby teeth but weren't quite ready to fall out. We had the chips in the fridge paint until we got rid of the fridge. Hehe...

* I was walking along a path, aged about 5 or so (it was safe in those days), and 3 older boys came the other way holding a glass bottle of milk. They said they'd throw it at me, I said go ahead, so they did, and it smashed at my feet. I ran back towards my Nan's house, and realised there was milk in my Mr. Man shoes. Until I looked down and saw it was blood. Eek. And my sis wouldn't take off her sock for my Mum to wrap it round my foot, probably payback for the tooth incident

* When my Mum dropped me off at Brownies one night, I stepped out of the car and she drove over my foot. I screamed to her that she'd done it, so she reversed and drove over it again. Hehe...

* I fell off my mountain bike on one of my first rides up in the Lakes and dived head-first into a pile of rocks, scratches everywhere. I bought a helmet the very next day.

* And I've knocked myslef out playing squash. I've also parachuted into a field of sheep which was quite funny; I landed whilst screaming, 'Move sheep, move!'.

19/11/2007 at 14:23
my list is still DEFINATELY the best def def def....def
19/11/2007 at 14:36

Just niticed this thread and though I'd add my list;

1996 - climbing accident 

  • minor head injury 
  • 2 broken ribs
  • 3 broken vertebrae
  • 1 broken lower eg

2003 - climbing accident

  • Severe head injury - but not fractured so doesn count as a break
  • 2 broken vertebae
  • 2 broken wrist
  • 1 fractured pelvis
  • 1 dislocated shoulder - another non-fracture but the only thing that still troubles me!

I don't climb any more  .


19/11/2007 at 14:56

Fab Forum,

One of my best is hitting a donkey in the midle of a road on my bike, whilst flying down a hill at great speed with no lights.

I saw my life flash before me, before ending up in a ditch. 

 I then pushed my bike to a friends house whose mother asked me if I had been drinking, to which I replied I was off down to the pub when I became a cropper.

Needless to say all my mates down the pub pissed themselves laughing.

I have also fallen down a flight of stairs whilst every so slightly pissed. I didn't feel a thing, my folks thought it was the dog!!. But instead found me in a puddle of wee, with a broken right arm in 3 places, Dislocated jaw, fractured & pushed in cheekbone after headbutting the oak door at the bottom of the stairs. Plus the woo woo took over half an hour to arrive. needless to say I looked very handsome for 6/8 weeks afterwards with one closed eye.

I also fell off a bike whilst aged 9 or so and had bits of gravel stuck to my chest. My kind mother then tried to scrub them out. From memory she then learned that I could swear!!

A cockerel also once took a chunk out of my left kneecap, but I had the last laugh by covering him with bread sauce the next day for lunch.

The last one i can remember from my youth is sawing to the bone my left thumb, you could see the white of the bone; whilst trying to cut logs. Now that hurt, but the local vet saved me a trip to the hospital, by sewing up my thumb for me. That won't happen today.

19/11/2007 at 15:21

On holiday in Greece few years ago.

Went out clubbing  & pulled a lovely young lady from Worcester towards the end the evening.

She accepted an invite back to my hotel room on the promise of a few more shots of sambucca & a night of serious BRT lovin.

Just getting down to business and I realise that my 'gents' protection devices were in my wash bag in the bathroom.

So I rush to the bathroom as quickly as my short little legs will carry me,hoping that she does drop off the boil,forgetting that earlier in the evening prior going out,I had shower and also being a bit lazy I had left a towel on the floor.

This bathroom had a smooth tiled floor & was still a bit wet.

Any how I push the door open,slip on the towel,door hits the door stop & starts to now to close.

As I slip backwards I managed to crack the back of head my on the edge of the now closing bathroom door.

I also hit my head on the tiled floor & cracked my elbow on the toilet.

Blood everywhere it was like a scene from Psycho.

To her credit said young lady made sure I got to Hospital.

I ended up in hospital with 5 stitches in the back of head and badly bruised elbow.

I missed a scuba diving trip the next day that I had already paid for.

 2 days later she got the highlight of her holiday only in the safety of her hotel room

19/11/2007 at 16:23

Well, where do I begin? I've been lucky so far that I haven't broken any bones yet (knock on wood, of course!), but in no particular order:

When I was 5 and my sister 4, we were fighting over a doll. She tore a leg off and bashed one of my front teeth out with it. I ran screaming and crying to my Mum, but she had visitors and couldn't do much. I went running back to my sister, and she bashed out my other front tooth.  And she never got punished for it. When my teeth had grown back, I bit her so hard at the back of her neck that she bled.

I had the usual scars on my knees and elbows from falling off bikes, I just have a couple left now.

When I was 8, I dove head first into a swimming pool that was too shallow and hit my head at the bottom. Fortunately I only ended up with painful ribs.

My sister and I used to share a room. Once we got into an argument after lights out, and my sister threw a shoe across the room in the dark and hit me between the eyes. I was dripping with blood, but didn't need stitches. There is still a little scar. And I got my own room after that.

My brother was riding his bike, and I was on rollerskates, holding on to the back. He went quite fast, and then stopped dead. I sat down very hard, and I couldn't stand, sit, or lie down properly for ages, and I had to sit on a donut pillow at school

At school, I was hit on the head by a baseball being batted at full force. I had a headache afterward which I extended, thereby getting extra sickie time!

gingerfurball    pirate
19/11/2007 at 19:29

Now...don't get me started on balls!!!  (Of the sporting variety!!)

We always joke that I have a "Ball Magnet" in my head!  I literally cannot go to sporting events that involve balls (eg.... you dirty gits... football and rugby and so on) because I'll always get hit on the head resulting in near coma level injuries!

To such an extent that sevreral years ago MrGFB and I were in Old Trafford and a miskick by a certain Mr Beckham rebounded into the crowd and nearly knocked me unconcious!  Seriously!!

19/11/2007 at 19:56
KK - It was a choice of landing on power lines, houses or a sharp spiky hedge. I chose the final direction - the field full of sheep. They looked like biters though
Ultra AJH    pirate
19/11/2007 at 19:56

A similar story to one on previous page, thankfully not so bad.............

Last RW social I attended I had a lovely evening, in fact a bit more lovely than I thought. When I got outside I realised that I was feeling a little wobbly, that's ok I thought I will be careful.

I was careful all the way across Blackfriars bridge, then I got to the underground station steps. I very carefully measured my first step............

...........missed it and managed to throw myself down the whole staircase, on the way I managed to cut my face on something and at the bottom landing on my face I fractured my cheekbone.

I had to ring Mr AJH before I got to him to warn him that he wasnt going to like what he was going to see. He was remarkably calm about it really.

My first ever injury was also facial, my mum lost control of the pram (so she says ) and I was thrown out cutting my lip badly. Luckily I was not good looking to start with.

19/11/2007 at 19:58
And one of my friends had a funny accident when she was about 8. The heating had gone wrong, so her Dad had boiled the kettle for a bath and had put the (metal) kettle on the toilet seat. My friend ran in dying for the toilet, pulled down her duds... and you can imagine what happened next! She had to stand up at school for a week
19/11/2007 at 20:05

Okay so this is not at all funny and was seriously awful at the time but I am sure I looked funny to those in my family who were kind enough to hide their grins from me at the time.

I fell when 6.5 months pregnant and shattered my wrist into a squillion pieces.  Cos of enormous bump they decided not to operate and just go for plaster up to my shoulder instead (in the hope that things would stabilise if i couldn't move anything - didn't work but that's another story).

anyway there I was, very very fat and very pregnant with right arms in plaster up to elbow (at wierd angle ) long hair which I couldn't brush or put in a bobble and covered in a mad rash from head to toe (I am allergic to pregnancy) and of course NO DRUGS!!!!

The only funny thing was the look on the ortho surgeons face when he walked round the corner with my x-rays and saw my bump.

19/11/2007 at 20:10

i remember a very serious moment

nephew, aged 6 at the time, had spent 10 weeks in isolation following a bone marrow transplant and was finally given the go ahead to leave his sterile environment and go into the courtyard

all he wanted to do was kick a ball about

how we laughed as grandma tripped on the ball while trying to playfully kick it to him, and fractured her wrist

and it was just down the corridor to casualty

19/11/2007 at 22:05
The same friend who sat on the hot kettle above, also fell off her top bunk bed and broke her arm in two places. She had 8 weeks in plaster up to her shoulder, went to get the plaster off and it hadn't healed properly so she had to spend another 6 weeks in plaster.
19/11/2007 at 22:10

Finished my finals in the rain in Scotland and in a fit of glee (maybe after a bottle of pretend champagne) ran down a hill with my crush of the moment - slipped and broke my elbow - much merriment as post-exams party drove me to casualty and casualty staff were asked whether the painkillers prescribed for me would interfere with my planned alcohol intake....

Don't you just love students?

Blisters    pirate
19/11/2007 at 23:52

The first car my Mum bought from new was a Metro. Very practical. She kept it for ages and then we kids became teenagers and students and started to drive.

I borrowed it one day (it's OK, it had plenty of fuel in it) and was taking my girlfriend to meet some mates. At one of those acute angled T junctions I set off for a gap in the traffic, except that the car in front didn't. One clanged bumper, but the other car was old and heavy and they couldn't see any damage. But what to do about the Metro? Arriving at my mates, we decide to nip over to Sheffield, buy a bumper, fit it, and thereby have a jolly good blokesy afternoon. To this day Mother doesn't know.

Sister managed to borrow the car on extended loan to take to Uni. Extended as in perpetuity. She pulled up at this hick little forecourt and got confused by the pump that said Unleaded/Diesel. Yup, she topped off the petrol tank with diesel. By crikey it didn't half smoke for a few hundred miles. She called me to ask for advice. Not liking my first answer, we agreed that she should drive it and burn out as much of this 2-stroke as possible, then fill it and dilute it away over a few tanks full. To this day Mother doesn't know.

A few years prior I was painting my Airfix models on the outdoor step, and spashed a bit of enamel paint on the concrete. The more I wiped, the more red the step became, so I painted the whole step. Mother knew.

21/11/2007 at 15:17

When i was 13 years old i was out for a run with a friend who was much faster than i. I crossed a busy country road and was hit by a car at 60 mph. Broke left leg in 4 places, left a dead patch on my right leg (that i still cant feel anything on to this day), cracked my skull, broken ribs, severe laserations on back, face, arms all over really.

Took about 6 months to fully recover. Oddly enough i stopped running for a few years after that!

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