Most serious? Most funny?
You must've been on the naughty a long, long time KK
Not my own misfortune but a mates who I was with at the time.
Two mates and I were going to visit a friend in Southampton, I was driving they were drinking heavily! Pi$$ stop number 1080948 was somewhere near Southampton railway station, my mate paul jumped over a 1 foot high wall to no doubt find a convienient spot to relieve himself.
After 10 minutes had passed and still no sign of him I went to look, there he was lying in agony having fallen the 30 odd foot the other side of the wall, lucky sod only fractured ankle.
I dont know how I manage to be one of the clumsiest accident prone people yet have never had any serious accidents, only broke my first bone at age of 36
Forgot about MrGFB...(good old Norn Iron!!) during the Northern ireland troubles MrGFB's family home was near a bit of a hotspot. There had been rioting near the end of his street and the family were looking out the front door to see if things were ok or should they get out...just then the army came in and started trying to sort things out...MrGFB was shot in the side of the head with a rubber bullet. He was taken to hospital where her nearly lost his eye (and suffers persistant migraines to this day.)
do i get a prize????????
Blacklisting from insurance companies. I will update the "secret database" on you tomorrow at work. who says we have no fun in the insurance world!
I was still laughing over the 'burned forehead from falling on the heated towel rail whilst putting knickers on in the bathroom', when I saw the one about trapping the dog's ear in the boot door; now I'm crying laughing.
My best are:
* My best friend, when I was three, and I were racing each other down our street, me on my tricycle and he on his go-cart. He (typical bloke!) cut me up and I had to turn into my drive at high speed. Tricycles don't turn well at fast speeds, and I went straight into the fence, which was one of those ones with sharp stones. Knocked myself out and had to have 15 stitches in my cheek.
* When I was about 9, my best friend and I were playing football and I got shouted in. It was my ball, so I picked it up, at the same time as he kicked it. Cue broken finger, although I only realised the next morning. I got all excited thinking I was going to have a cast, only for them to strap it to the next finger. Grrrr...
* Whilst swinging my sister around the kitchen as we were both attached to opposite ends of a scarf, she slipped and hit the fridge, knocking out three of her front teeth. They were baby teeth but weren't quite ready to fall out. We had the chips in the fridge paint until we got rid of the fridge. Hehe...
* I was walking along a path, aged about 5 or so (it was safe in those days), and 3 older boys came the other way holding a glass bottle of milk. They said they'd throw it at me, I said go ahead, so they did, and it smashed at my feet. I ran back towards my Nan's house, and realised there was milk in my Mr. Man shoes. Until I looked down and saw it was blood. Eek. And my sis wouldn't take off her sock for my Mum to wrap it round my foot, probably payback for the tooth incident
* When my Mum dropped me off at Brownies one night, I stepped out of the car and she drove over my foot. I screamed to her that she'd done it, so she reversed and drove over it again. Hehe...
* I fell off my mountain bike on one of my first rides up in the Lakes and dived head-first into a pile of rocks, scratches everywhere. I bought a helmet the very next day.
* And I've knocked myslef out playing squash. I've also parachuted into a field of sheep which was quite funny; I landed whilst screaming, 'Move sheep, move!'.
here's the list as far as I can remember:
nose - fell off my pogo stick at age 11!
left side ribs - ski accident
right side ribs - orienteering race, caught my foot in a bramble and fell down a 10ft drop.
left wrist - ice skating fall
left foot/ankle/metatarsals - 3 times, turned ankle once coming down a mountain in a race, and twice on tree roots while training in the woods.
right foot/ankle/metatarsals - twice, once put my foot in a hole in the dark, the second time falling off my bike.
(I have osteoporosis, so my bones break easily)
Just niticed this thread and though I'd add my list;
1996 - climbing accident
2003 - climbing accident
I don't climb any more .
One of my best is hitting a donkey in the midle of a road on my bike, whilst flying down a hill at great speed with no lights.
I saw my life flash before me, before ending up in a ditch.
I then pushed my bike to a friends house whose mother asked me if I had been drinking, to which I replied I was off down to the pub when I became a cropper.
Needless to say all my mates down the pub pissed themselves laughing.
I have also fallen down a flight of stairs whilst every so slightly pissed. I didn't feel a thing, my folks thought it was the dog!!. But instead found me in a puddle of wee, with a broken right arm in 3 places, Dislocated jaw, fractured & pushed in cheekbone after headbutting the oak door at the bottom of the stairs. Plus the woo woo took over half an hour to arrive. needless to say I looked very handsome for 6/8 weeks afterwards with one closed eye.
I also fell off a bike whilst aged 9 or so and had bits of gravel stuck to my chest. My kind mother then tried to scrub them out. From memory she then learned that I could swear!!
A cockerel also once took a chunk out of my left kneecap, but I had the last laugh by covering him with bread sauce the next day for lunch.
The last one i can remember from my youth is sawing to the bone my left thumb, you could see the white of the bone; whilst trying to cut logs. Now that hurt, but the local vet saved me a trip to the hospital, by sewing up my thumb for me. That won't happen today.
hitting a donkey in the midle of a road on my bike
PMSL - now that tops the squirrels!
On holiday in Greece few years ago.
Went out clubbing & pulled a lovely young lady from Worcester towards the end the evening.
She accepted an invite back to my hotel room on the promise of a few more shots of sambucca & a night of serious BRT lovin.
Just getting down to business and I realise that my 'gents' protection devices were in my wash bag in the bathroom.
So I rush to the bathroom as quickly as my short little legs will carry me,hoping that she does drop off the boil,forgetting that earlier in the evening prior going out,I had shower and also being a bit lazy I had left a towel on the floor.
This bathroom had a smooth tiled floor & was still a bit wet.
Any how I push the door open,slip on the towel,door hits the door stop & starts to now to close.
As I slip backwards I managed to crack the back of head my on the edge of the now closing bathroom door.
I also hit my head on the tiled floor & cracked my elbow on the toilet.
Blood everywhere it was like a scene from Psycho.
To her credit said young lady made sure I got to Hospital.
I ended up in hospital with 5 stitches in the back of head and badly bruised elbow.
I missed a scuba diving trip the next day that I had already paid for.
2 days later she got the highlight of her holiday only in the safety of her hotel room
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