and what are your qualifications...

...to post on here?

41 to 60 of 70 messages
seren nos    pirate
22/10/2012 at 19:00

i have several OWLS and NEWTS

22/10/2012 at 20:13

 

23/10/2012 at 00:27
PhilPub wrote (see)

When I've got nothing better to do I'm gonna further my studies with an MA followed by a DPhil.  Then I can have a sign on the door reading:

Dr Phil MA DPhil

LMAO! You plonker!

I have a bunch of O Grades and Highers - Scottish A level thingys but easier.

23/10/2012 at 01:26
I have an NVQ level 3 in machine printing, and a clean driving license. I have also had my name at the top of the leaderboard in the pig and fiddle pub in Bath for drinking a yard of ale the fastest.
23/10/2012 at 07:11

I notice no one is owning up to having a Jim'll fix it badge.

JvR
23/10/2012 at 12:34

Some CSE and O levels, some A levels, HND and Graduate Dips in computing, BSAC Sports Diver, First Aid at work certificate, some software testing qualifications and a BTEC first certificate in sport from those lovely guys that organise the Great Runs.
Clean driving license thanks to a Driver Awareness Training course and a nice policeman letting me off with a ticking off after stopping me for going too fast with a car load of screaming family.

23/10/2012 at 15:25

A degree in history and a certificate which says I've been up in a balloon 

23/10/2012 at 15:49

I have access to the internet, a credit card and a printer. 

  Dr Ferret BEng MA MSc LLB FRCS etc etc

LIVERBIRD    pirate
23/10/2012 at 18:29
How annoying is it that you can't use the quote function on an iPad?
You can pick em up but not put em down again.

I once grabbed Holgs's bollocks at the same time as covering his eyes so he couldn't see who it was.

This qualifies me to post on here because he guessed who it was without me saying a word. So I must have psychic powers to transmit my name
Ironholgs    pirate
24/10/2012 at 14:47
M...eldy wrote (see)
sarah the bookworm wrote (see)

Nuh huh, I saw Liverbird in a bookshop in Manchester!

Nahh .. that was Holgs

Easy mistake to make 

 

LIVERBIRD wrote (see)
How annoying is it that you can't use the quote function on an iPad?
You can pick em up but not put em down again.

I once grabbed Holgs's bollocks at the same time as covering his eyes so he couldn't see who it was.

This qualifies me to post on here because he guessed who it was without me saying a word. So I must have psychic powers to transmit my name

No, just rough hands.

Ironholgs    pirate
24/10/2012 at 14:49

qualifications to post on here? The ability to read mostly bollocks and to repy with equal amounts of sh*te.

Proper qualifications. Highest would be an MA, lowest would be the test certificate I got from the clinic after said encounter with Liverbird.

K80
24/10/2012 at 17:05

I'd just like to thank you all - the original and subsequent posters - on this thread for making me belly laugh after such a cack day in the office.

LIVERBIRD    pirate
24/10/2012 at 17:55
Ironholgs wrote (see)
M...eldy wrote (see)
sarah the bookworm wrote (see)

Nuh huh, I saw Liverbird in a bookshop in Manchester!

Nahh .. that was Holgs

Easy mistake to make 

 

LIVERBIRD wrote (see)
How annoying is it that you can't use the quote function on an iPad?
You can pick em up but not put em down again.

I once grabbed Holgs's bollocks at the same time as covering his eyes so he couldn't see who it was.

This qualifies me to post on here because he guessed who it was without me saying a word. So I must have psychic powers to transmit my name

No, just rough hands.

I've grown my nails Holgs. You'd better wear a box next time!

Ironholgs    pirate
25/10/2012 at 11:57

Didn't you get the restraining order in the post?

25/10/2012 at 12:54
I'll get Suzie to schedule you in for clinic
Ironholgs    pirate
25/10/2012 at 13:02

Thanks.

IronCat5    pirate
25/10/2012 at 19:20
FerrousFerret wrote (see)

I have access to the internet, a credit card and a printer. 

  Dr Ferret BEng MA MSc LLB FRCS etc etc

If I'd known I could have got a BEng using credit I would.....oh hang on...that's what student loans were for, Took longer than a few minutes online though

I have a few qualifications, I didn't hand my MPhil in, and I'm not an MA (Mincers Anonymous). Nothing remotely relevant to running. I also don't have any qualifications for looking after children, but find myself responsible for two of the beggars!

25/10/2012 at 23:34

I ate 24 dinners in a hall for my professional qualification. No weeing or smoking (it was a while ago) until second grace said after pudding. The trick was to sit with the teetotal malaysian and singapore students and have all the wine and port to yourself, and then stumble out with your mates who had done the same thing. There were some exams in law involved at some stage, but there was no qualification without  those dinners. Suited me fine.

26/10/2012 at 22:51
I've got a Bsc(uit), after my sister had finished doctoring my degree certificate. Dad was a bit pissed off at that stunt as he valued that sort of thing.

I used to be an ACA (Chartered accountancy thingy) but I let it lapse when I stopped paying the annual subs. I could have made it to FCA but wasn't prepared to lie about my Continuing Professional Education.

I once had a fork lift truck drivers certificate and I've also got the RGT level 3 in electric guitar playing....now that's what I call a qualification.

Joking aside, getting my ACA accountancy qualification in very difficult and pecunious circumstances was a really big deal and changed my life completely.
27/10/2012 at 01:35

Ba, BSc, LLB, MB ChB Ma Msc LLM PhD.

Oh right, you mean actual real qualifications?

Edited: 27/10/2012 at 01:36
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