Book titles..

..of the amusing variety

9 messages
04/09/2002 at 09:31
Crime Fighting by Les B. Avenue?
04/09/2002 at 10:01
Russian Wrestling by Itor Abolokov
Iron SwissBobby    pirate
04/09/2002 at 10:03
Sore Bum by Ben Dover.
04/09/2002 at 12:28
ok well what about.....

Water on the bathroom floor by I.P. Gozy
04/09/2002 at 12:42
Incontinence by I. P Freeleigh
04/09/2002 at 12:43
Is that right? I'm not sure? what are water troubles called (no one be a smart arse and call it a flood or a drought!)
WildWill    pirate
04/09/2002 at 13:15
Gourmet Picnics by Ted E. Bear
WildWill    pirate
04/09/2002 at 13:20
Great British Road Crossings BY Jay Walker
04/09/2002 at 19:37
The Spot On My Bum - Horrible Poems for Horrible Children by Gez Walsh.

All because I'm a child at heart!

Here's a taster:

Good grief! This spot on my bum,
I've squeezed it so much that my cheeks
Have gone mumb.
It's big and it's red,
With a big yellow top,
I've squeezed it with pliers,
But still it won't pop!
I've soaked it in water,
I've put on some cream.
Mum had a squeeze,
Which just made me scream.
I can't sit down now,
The pain is quite dire,
My spot is glowing,
And my bum is on fire!
I cried to my mum
"Just one last try, please."
So mum, with a grip like Superman,
Started to squeeze.
Yes, mum had hold of my spot,
With a vice-like grip.
My eyes they were popping
And I was biting my lip.
My body started shaking without restraint,
My legs they wobbled,
I started to faint.
Then my mum cried out with such distaste,
Because my spot, like a time-bomb
Had exploded in her face!


Here's another one

Teeth

My teacher, Beaky Bamforth,
Has very strange teeth;
They flap up and down,
When he talks and he breathes.
But his are not the strangest
Teeth that I have seen,
Not by far,
Because my Grandad's teeth, they grin at me
From inside of a jar!

ok! ok! I'll stop now, but let me know if you would like some more little poems from The Spot On My Bum.

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