The Worst Ever... - Clubhouse

Mr A

10/10/2002 at 11:58

OK, so we have our reminiscence thread - Whatever Happened To - where we're talking about the bands we have loved over the years. Which makes this the counterpoint to that thread: what are the worst bands you've ever seen or bought records by?

I'll start:

Worst single bought: "Lady In Red" by Chris DeBurgh - I was young and naive is my only excuse.

Worst album bought: "Pipes Of Peace" by Paul McCartney - what was I thinking?

Worst band seen: it's a tie between Oasis (my wife fell asleep and I was bored stiff) and Yngwie Malmsteen's Rising Force (I sat in the corner and went to sleep).

Gavo

10/10/2002 at 12:07

Am ashamed to say that I have a couple of Jamiroquai (or however it's spelt) CDs that I have listened to once. Not really sure what the worst gig I've ever been to though I was quite bored at the one & only Springsteen gig that I got taken to.

Snoop Dogg

10/10/2002 at 12:17

..has to be Village People - The Hits.

My excuse? Well, I just liked their party songs.

However, I purchased it about 10 years ago without realising that I would then get the exaggerated limp wrist traetment and other homophobic comments afterwards - it's as if, "oh you purchased Village People, you must be a screaming queen then".

Do purchasers of George Michael and Will Young records get the same treatment?

Barkles

10/10/2002 at 12:20

worst gig- Human league, lancaster Uni 1982 ( i think)

Best Gig - Ozzy Osbourne Donnoington and Dire Straits before fame.

Worst record- I'll have to think about this one - there's been so many.

Kezza in Singapore

10/10/2002 at 12:25

Worst band - the support band for Natalie Merchant at the Royal Albert Hall in May this year - DIRE. Can't remember what they were called - don't want to.....

Worst single - Nikita, Elton John (well I was about twelve at the time)

Worst album - Deep Blue Something 'Home' - which Mr F and I bought for the single 'Breakfast at Tiffany's', but the rest of the album is pretty awful.

Worst album ever bought for us as a present - Ensemble Tbilisi singing Georgian Folk Songs....I think it must have been a joke

Gareth L

10/10/2002 at 12:32

Haircut 100 album. need i say more. i think i destroyed it.

I also had a duran duran album which i was embarrased about so i sold it for £2. although looking back DD wern't all that bad i suppose.

Barkles

10/10/2002 at 12:43

East 17. Thats it. They were total pants. One of their tracks is on a comilation I've got and I hate it with a passion.

Gareth L

10/10/2002 at 12:49

i think they did one song that was ok, but i'm having trouble remembering it. it obviously can't of been that good then.

Redhead

10/10/2002 at 12:53

Worst album, can't remember it's name but was by 'Half Man, Half Biscuit'. It had endearing songs such as 'I Hate Nerys Hughes' and 'I left my heart in Papworth General'.

Gareth L

10/10/2002 at 13:01

i left my heart in Papworth general !! what the hell was that. (can't stop laughing and everyones looking at me).

Gavo

10/10/2002 at 13:01

Agree with FANY on the Natalie Merchant support band but wasn't quite the worst support band that I have seen - I saw someone supporting the River City People (I was young - forgive me) who were far worse than dire.

As for bad records, I honestly think that there should be a quality control expert at HMV, Tower, Virgin etc so that when people buy stuff by Will Young, Atomic Kitten (possible contender for worst cover version ever with that Blondie song), etc (add your own as a form of catharsis) then they should be told that it's for their own good - "Put it down, you'll thank me some day".

Barkles

10/10/2002 at 13:20

Saw Duran Duran as support for Hazel O'connor in 1980 - forecast a life of dullness and mediocrity for them!!!

Oops wrong again

Mister Baimbridge

10/10/2002 at 13:24

I'm not sure why, but I did go to a Brother Beyond concert once. I think we thought it would be a laugh. It wasn't. Worst album I've ever heard is, without a doubt, Be Here Now by Oasis, Absolute pants. A lady friend recorded it for me, and raved about it. I listened to it in my car, and it was unceremoniously dumped in a roadside skip.

How about worst film?
Natural Born Killers gets my vote. No, hold on a minute. The Blues Brothers. Utter, utter plop.

Scar Runner

10/10/2002 at 13:29

Worst concert: heavy metal band called Blackfoot, Hammersmith I think ca 1982, invited by very short term boyfriend with a penchant for glue sniffing.

Nothing since has been quite as bad I'm pleased to say.

Scar Runner

10/10/2002 at 13:30

That goes for both the band and the boyfriend come to think of it.

neilruns .

10/10/2002 at 13:33

Oh, I used to love Half Man Half Biscuit. The one about Lev Yashin and Dukla Prague....? Excellent lyrics. I saw them at Exeter Uni many years ago and they stopped 1/2 way through their set - one of the guitar strings broke and they took ages to find a spare.

Worst - Sisters of Mercy i think.

Nick.M

10/10/2002 at 13:35

Half man Half Biscuit did a track called ""99 percent of Gargoyles look like Bob Todd"

fat face

10/10/2002 at 13:36

Barkles,
I don't believe it. I was at the very same Human League concert at Lancaster Uni. It was absolute pants wasn't it. If my memory serves me correctly, they had technical problems. The support were 2 blokes who were even worse than H.L. and they ended up covered in spit and flem and grolly etc.

We retired to the bar after 3 songs.

Mr A

10/10/2002 at 13:42

Half Man Half Biscuit were one of our favourite bands at school (we were also quite keen on Ivor Cutler). Their songs and lyrics were superb - I first heard them in a local indie record shop when "F***in' 'Ell, It's Fred Titmus" came on.

Other classic tracks include:

99% Of Gargoyles Look Like Bob Todd
Time Flies By (When You're A Driver Of A Train)
I Hate Nerys Hughes (From The Heart)
I Love You Because (You Look Like Jim Reeves)
The Trumpton Riots
All I Want For Christmas Is A Dukla Prague Away Kit
Dickie Davies Eyes
Rod Hull Is Alive - Why?
13 Eurogoths Floating In The Dead Sea
Styx Gig (Seen By My Mates Coming Out Of A)
Hair Like Brian May Blues
Tonight Matthew I'm Going To Be With Jesus
Paintball's Coming Home
Ballad Of Climie Fisher
Bob Wilson - Anchorman
The Light At The End Of The Tunnel (Is The Light Of An Oncoming Train)

Kezza in Singapore

10/10/2002 at 13:43

Natural Born Killers was SO bad - gross. Saw a worse one last Sunday on Ch4 though - 8MM with Nicholas Cage.....horrible