Things you want to say but can't

A chance to get it off your chest

14,701 to 14,720 of 16,421 messages
22/04/2013 at 10:34

Dear XX: I know you're young but you really arre pretty dim aren't you? How do you even find your way out of bed in the morning?

22/04/2013 at 11:30

Dear cold - please leave my chest alone, it really hasn't done anything to you and doesn't deserve it.

Thanks.

24/04/2013 at 10:16

Dear Forumite: I honestly can't beleive you are still alive.

25/04/2013 at 10:28

Great, another fecking group of people who don't know how to do their jobs and have apparently been sitting in a cave somewhere for the past 8 months....

26/04/2013 at 09:32

Dear test team - all of you, testers and test management, close up your laptops, get up out of your seats and walk away. Just go. You are fecking useless the lot of you.

Testers - you don't know what you're doing. I don't really care if the test script tells you to expect a certain outcome. The outcome is as per the standard and how it is supposed to work. And as it's the standard I pretty much suspect that trumps a test script written by you.

Test managers - I blame you more. You work on the basis that if you employ an infinite number of testers working on an infinite number of laptops they will eventually successfully run a test. Wrong. They create havoc because they have as much knowledge of the system they are testing as I do about the mating habits of a slug.

You have been running test phases for two years now. In that time hasn't it occurred to you to do some kind of root cause analysis? You know, perhaps look for trends? Maybe even question why something that has been in production for two years and hasn't changed should now be a problem? In affect get others to get up off of their arses and look at these things instead of throwing everything the way of my team and I.

And as for working weekends to catch up you can feck right off. I, unlike you, did a root cause analysis on all the stuff that we have had to deal with. I wrote a triage process for you so that things could be dealt with efficiently. I offered to do an initial check for you. I offered to talk to you and the testers. You decided it wasn't necessary. So you can jog on.

Edited: 26/04/2013 at 09:41
26/04/2013 at 17:54

Supermarket starting with a W, your chocolate sponge cake that you charge a lot for,is to put it bluntly, very average.
Dry crumbly sponge and the meanest amount of filling possible,yet you charge over £5 for it. My friend was ripped off.

27/04/2013 at 02:17

Mancunian moped riders - if you weave down  the middle of M67 at 0130 with no lights, and in dark clothing, you are quite likely to be killed and end up on someone's conscience. Perhaps you should grow up a little.

27/04/2013 at 11:27

Oi you lot! Yes you lot in lycra short and matching t shirts with your names on. Yes you lot who sat around the office one day and decided that it would be fun to do a race together. When I say together I meen you lot that run side by side sometimes six or seven wide causing a moving lycra road block. I admire you sense of spirit and team work, but whatever made you think you shoud put yourselves into that time bracket. You have done little or no training and you are holding up those of us who have. GET OUT OF THE WAY FOR F@*KS SAKE.

27/04/2013 at 12:31
SteadyCJ wrote (see)

Supermarket starting with a W, your chocolate sponge cake that you charge a lot for,is to put it bluntly, very average.
Dry crumbly sponge and the meanest amount of filling possible,yet you charge over £5 for it. My friend was ripped off.

The date and walnut loaf is much nicer (and cheaper). I find most supermarket chocolate cake is pants, although M&S Swiss rolls have plenty of filling in them...

 

Hillmaster wrote (see)

Oi you lot! Yes you lot in lycra short and matching t shirts with your names on. Yes you lot who sat around the office one day and decided that it would be fun to do a race together. When I say together I meen you lot that run side by side sometimes six or seven wide causing a moving lycra road block. I admire you sense of spirit and team work, but whatever made you think you shoud put yourselves into that time bracket. You have done little or no training and you are holding up those of us who have. GET OUT OF THE WAY FOR F@*KS SAKE.

Maybe it was a particularly active Stag do?

 

Edited: 27/04/2013 at 12:32
27/04/2013 at 13:16

Please can we fast forward to 5pm today and save the agony of waiting for the outcome?

27/04/2013 at 14:13

ehy did you have to write a report that was full of errors and makes it seem like my little boy is incapable and, to put it bluntly, thick.

27/04/2013 at 17:34

Woohoooooooooooo

27/04/2013 at 18:23

To my  kids: STOP EATING ALL THE F@*$%^g CHOCOLATE BISCUITS.

27/04/2013 at 21:36
Womble wrote (see)

Woohoooooooooooo

Give us a clue Womble...

27/04/2013 at 23:54

AFC Wimbledon stay in League  Two  having needed to win to do it.

28/04/2013 at 14:24

Ooh, result then

28/04/2013 at 17:54

Woohoo indeed, Womble. I don't really follow footie much but always please to hear that they have won.

28/04/2013 at 17:56

Dear people of Colchester if someone jogging past you on a fine sunny morning wishes you a cheery "Good morning" it not only takes more effort to pretend you can neither hear or see me but makes you look like a right ignorant c%@t.

28/04/2013 at 17:58

That's Colchester for you oirisheyes.  There's a reason why I moved away

28/04/2013 at 18:10
Womble wrote (see)

AFC Wimbledon stay in League  Two  having needed to win to do it.


You can see clearly on the TV footage, a large womble invading the pitch at the end.

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