Things you want to say but can't - Clubhouse

Johnny Blaze

30/08/2010 at 09:07

Whether it's for legal reasons, the desire to keep your job or just plain self preservation. What would you love to say in the real world but really can't? Could be job or relationship or family - could even be related to running.

I'll kick off with the following:

I'm sorry if you are upset that I am apparently questioning your ability to do your job, but the truth is I, and a number of other people, have been covering for you for the last 2 months and its about time someone told you to pull your finger out and do your fecking job the way you're supposed to!

...and breathe.

(Thread nicked from Fetch, where it is noted for some top rants)

LIVERBIRD

pirate

30/08/2010 at 09:08

Your baby is really ugly. You shouldn't have been allowed to breed....

Johnny Blaze

30/08/2010 at 09:10

Excellent start! This is what I'm talkin about!

LIVERBIRD

pirate

30/08/2010 at 09:12

Why are buying doughnuts when you are already so bloody fat?

Johnny Blaze

30/08/2010 at 09:13

You don't need to use smileys either as they are conciliatory...

LIVERBIRD

pirate

30/08/2010 at 09:14

Sorry. I shall try harder next time!

Trying to think of something else right now....

STU -

30/08/2010 at 09:34

big bones don't wobble

LIVERBIRD

pirate

30/08/2010 at 09:43

Pull your f**king pants up! If I show you MY knickers I'd be arrested but I'm forced to look at YOUR neon green boxer shorts with Kermit the f**king frog on them because you call it fashion!

YOU LOOK A TIT.

Slugsta

30/08/2010 at 10:03

When I ask 'how are you?' in a social setting, I am looking for a social reply. If you really want to tell me about your rash, chlamydia etc, made a fecking appointment!

Jay Snizzel

30/08/2010 at 10:10

Dear overweight diabetic co-worker.
Chocolates and fizzy sweets are bad for you. So is chocolate milk. Do yourself a favour and next time someone brings cakes in for their birthday why don't you give it a miss.

Oh and really don't care if you think your feet are your best feature you've still got cankles!

STU -

30/08/2010 at 10:12

Jay Snizzel wrote (see)

Oh and really don't care if you think your feet are your best feature you've still got cankles!

wouldn't like "cankles" -they sound awful

Jay Snizzel

30/08/2010 at 10:14

Yeah its not a good look

Mr Puffy

30/08/2010 at 10:53

LIVERBIRD wrote (see)

Pull your f**king pants up! If I show you MY knickers I'd be arrested but I'm forced to look at YOUR neon green boxer shorts with Kermit the f**king frog on them because you call it fashion!
YOU LOOK A TIT.

You've met my elder son then?

Muttley

30/08/2010 at 10:58

Are you talking to me or to your mobile phone? Since you clearly have no idea about basic manners, let me tell you that breaking off mid-sentence to answer or otherwise twiddle with your phone and expecting me to sit there and wait for you to resume whatever fascinating thing you were saying is DOWNRIGHT FECKING RUDE. Yet you think that I'm rude because I wander off instead of pandering to your sense of importance and connectedness.

And don't even get me started on your ringtone.

Edited: 30/08/2010 at 10:59

Muttley

30/08/2010 at 11:07

You guys make me laugh when you call yourselves "the Leadership Group". You bunch of pretentious wankers, you're just "the management". There is a difference between management and leadership. Most of you wouldn't recognize leadership for as long as you've got a hole in your arse. So I tell you what, I'll go on strike and lose a day's pay to fight for our pensions. You, by contrast, come in and work because you're desperate to keep in with the big boss. Take it easy, you spineless creeps, we'll do all the fighting for you.

Muttley

30/08/2010 at 11:08

Thank you for this thread, JB. I feel better now

limper

30/08/2010 at 11:21

If I was as bloody fat and unfit as you I wouldn't risk smoking as well.
And if I did smoke I wouldn't have got as fat as you.
And don't let your ugly screeching child drop sweetie litter in my world.
You hideous, ignorant, lazy, loud mouthed, benefit supported chavvy slapper.

Phew.
Thanks JB.

limper

30/08/2010 at 11:22

I would have got beaten up if I'd said all that outside the shops this morning.

Nicko. Hdau pirate

pirate

30/08/2010 at 11:28

Show me your knickers LB and I'll put you in handcuffs

{slips in conthingy smiley}

Bruce C

30/08/2010 at 11:29

No! I'm not sorry for taking out your wing mirror as I ran past.

Perhaps if you hadn't parked completely obstructing the pavement forcing me out into a busy main road to get passed then maybe the heel of my palm wouldn't have left your wing mirror dangling, as I frantically avoided being hit by the on rushing lorry.

What? nowhere else to park ? should have f##king thought about that before you bought the house on a main road.