Top Regrets of the Dying

Thoughts?

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kittenkat    pirate
31/01/2012 at 17:23

The most common regrets include:

  • ‘I wish I’d been true to myself,’
  • ‘I wish I hadn’t worked so hard,’
  • ‘I wish I’d had the courage to express my feelings,’
  • ‘I wish I had stayed in touch with my friends,'
  • ‘I wish that I had let myself be happier.’

(Bronnie Ware)

31/01/2012 at 17:28
How do they know such things, I mean who when watching a loved one or friend during their last moments asks a question like that.
kittenkat    pirate
31/01/2012 at 17:31
Squeakz wrote (see)
How do they know such things, I mean who when watching a loved one or friend during their last moments asks a question like that.
It's from a book written by an Australian nurse who worked in palliative care.
31/01/2012 at 17:31
" I told you I was ill"
31/01/2012 at 17:32
I wish I hadn't stood on that IED...
kittenkat    pirate
31/01/2012 at 17:33
Sussex Runner (NLR) wrote (see)
" I told you I was ill"

Down Spike!

(I've told this story before on here, but my Mum was picked up be him when she was hitchhiking in London as a teen. He took her straight home with a flea in her ear)

Edited: 31/01/2012 at 17:43
31/01/2012 at 17:36

Yeah, I heard about that book on the radio today.Just confirms all my previous suspicions about what most folk will end up regretting later on in life.

I always used to get moaned at by my folks for being too laid back, for not being ambitious enough, for not pushing myself career-wise. And I always used to think: I bet there's not many people lying there on their death beds saying to themselves "Damn, I wish I'd spent more time at the office..."

kittenkat    pirate
31/01/2012 at 17:47
Noanie wrote (see)

Yeah, I heard about that book on the radio today.Just confirms all my previous suspicions about what most folk will end up regretting later on in life.

I always used to get moaned at by my folks for being too laid back, for not being ambitious enough, for not pushing myself career-wise. And I always used to think: I bet there's not many people lying there on their death beds saying to themselves "Damn, I wish I'd spent more time at the office..."

Yeah exactly and that was one of the points I've heard in the media today. BUT, are they really regrets, would people really have lived their life any differently? We all have the power to change and the realisation at certain points in our lives that we fucked up or would like to do some things differently. But who actually does? I do think our default setting generally is just to get on with it.

We're fearful or lazy or just not that bothered?

(sweeping generalisation of course)

Edited: 31/01/2012 at 18:10
31/01/2012 at 17:53

I have twice decided that I wasn't happy with my life and chose to make some tough decisions to improve my quality of life.  But in between those times I guess  I fell into the above category KK.  Both times the changes were inspired by the thought that I could die without ever really enjoying myself or being happy.

I think that if I was to die now my regrets would be about the things I did do (the way I have behaved in the past, and hurt people for example) rather than those I didn't.

31/01/2012 at 18:23

I never got to shag Kylie

and of course

Kylie will go to her grave knowing she missed a night with me

31/01/2012 at 18:26
There's still time Dave.  Don't give up hope.
kittenkat    pirate
31/01/2012 at 18:28
SuperCaz wrote (see)
 

I have twice decided that I wasn't happy with my life and chose to make some tough decisions to improve my quality of life.  But in between those times I guess  I fell into the above category KK.  Both times the changes were inspired by the thought that I could die without ever really enjoying myself or being happy.

I think that if I was to die now my regrets would be about the things I did do (the way I have behaved in the past, and hurt people for example) rather than those I didn't.

I don't regret the things that I've done, which doesn't mean I was right necessarily or without a sense of remorse (no wrong word; reflection), but I understand why I did them and have come to terms with that.

I just hope that women with beards still aren't allowed to stone people.

kittenkat    pirate
31/01/2012 at 18:31
Dave The Ex- Spartan wrote (see)

I never got to shag Kylie

and of course

Kylie will go to her grave knowing she missed a night with me

For Kylie to actually know who you are Dave, you have to stalk her and she has to get an injunction. Otherwise you are just one of a million trillion 'Dave's. (No idea about the apostrophe there, where is wilkie when you need her?)

I'm helping you out here.

31/01/2012 at 18:33
I'm never giving up hope of Kylie finally seeing the light (well if she plays her cards right she'll see more than the light)
31/01/2012 at 18:37
She got the injunction after "that" night at the MEN arena on the ShowGirl tour
kittenkat    pirate
31/01/2012 at 18:49

I wrote something a bit controversial on FB once (yes just the once, I usually behave on there as there are people from all dimensions of my life).

I got a load of shit for it of course by easily offended people; and so I was a bit sheepish the next morning. My Doctor of Physics Iranian neighbour (with multi million dollar companies worldwide built from scratch) slowed his car down as he passed our house, D and I were both outside.

"Kate, I saw your FB conversation"

He stared at me and I muttered

"Um yeah, it was the way I felt just then" (Subtext: How fucking low can I sink into the ground right now?)

His reply?

"Good on you, if everyone said what they thought then the world would be a much easier and honest place"

 I'm not sure that I fully agree because emotions are important and connection is important. But he's right in the fact that false stuff is shit.

31/01/2012 at 18:52
I know what you mean, I tend to keep FB clean (well apart from teasing Liver Gob) as lots of people including the kids read it
31/01/2012 at 19:19

I am very cautious about what I put on facebook after being burnt before so I'd rather leave it out than publish it

I've had the fortune/misfortune of having a close family member who has been very close to death more than once. She's come to accept her passing will come sooner rather than later but she very freely admits that her only regret is saving her money for a rainy day. She's got enough for her kids to inherit and there's enough for her to be comfortable now but she scrimped and saved for years and wished that she had spent a little bit more.

31/01/2012 at 21:30

I was once aksed by someone when I was 19 what I wanted - and my reply then was to be happy - I'm 52 now - and have had a lot of sh*t over the past few years some of which I have posted on here a few years back - but I can look back knowing that on the whole I have achieved (to date) what I wanted - I ran over 400 races ended up with times that compare with some of the faster blokes on here, won races, travelled abroad and all round the UK -    I married at 41, we  had our son at 43 - he is nearly 9 now - live in a way to small bungalow next to the sea - am in debt due to paying for childcare due to my wife's long term depression - but do you know what, I am still happy - I have a lovely little boy far brighter than either my wife or I am - a wife that I love dearly - I started running again after a 12 year break at the start of 2011 am fitter and lighter than I have been for years - and if something happened tomorrow - I think apart from not wanting to die tomorrow -I can say I have achieved the goal - yes I am happy!! 

31/01/2012 at 21:33
"I wish I'd had more sex" - John Betjeman.
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