What's the worst joke that you've ever heard?

1 to 20 of 150 messages
25/10/2012 at 10:55

Why did the chewing gum cross the road?

It was stuck to the chicken's foot.

25/10/2012 at 11:01

I have fought and beaten my addiction. I was hooked on the hokey cokey.

But I've turned myself around, and that's what it's all about.

25/10/2012 at 11:21

did you hear about the man who had a trumpet buried in his garden?

he had to root-it-oot

25/10/2012 at 11:25

Did I tell you what my favourite curry sauce is? It's tarka.

Like tikka, but a little 'otter.

25/10/2012 at 11:27

What sort of cheese can you hide a horse in?

Mascarpone. 

25/10/2012 at 13:56

Lance Armstrong - It's not about the Bike !!!   Apparently, he was right

25/10/2012 at 14:34

What do you call a deer with no eyes?








No idea!

25/10/2012 at 14:37

What do you call a deer with no eyes and no legs?

 

Still no idea...

25/10/2012 at 14:54

Runners World Forum Moderators

25/10/2012 at 15:17

What do you call a deer with no eyes, no legs, and no willy?







Still no f*cking idea!

25/10/2012 at 15:36

As told by a 17 year old 6th form student at my school earlier this week:

"What do you call a donkey with no eyes?

 

No idea

 

 

wait, did I get that right?"

 

 

This Ladies and Gentlemen is the future generation 

25/10/2012 at 16:28

What you need is a donkey joke that works.

What do you call a donkey with three legs?

A wonky!

26/10/2012 at 19:42

What's red and invisible? No tomatoes.

26/10/2012 at 19:46

What do you call a vampire with a bag?

Sackula.

26/10/2012 at 20:11

Bear with me or just skip to the next post....

A wide-mouth frog  leaves his pond and see the world.
He met a large, four-legged black and white animal with two horns, and said (Open mouth very wide and say) "Hello, I'm a wide-mouth frog, what are you, and what do you eat?"
"I'm a cow, and I eat grass"
(Open mouth very wide and say) "Oh", said the wide-mouth frog, "is that so."
The wide-mouthed frog then came to a huge bird with sharp talons and a curved beak. (Open mouth very wide and say) "Hello, I'm a wide-mouth frog, what are you, and what do you eat?"
"I'm an eagle, and I eat little birds and mice"
(Open mouth very wide and say) "Oh", said the wide-mouth frog, "is that so."
Next another large four-legged creature, standing on his hind legs, with sharp claws. (Open mouth very wide and say) "Hello, I'm a wide-mouth frog, what are you, and what do you eat?"
"I'm a bear, and I eat honey"
(Open mouth very wide and say) "Oh", said the wide-mouth frog, "is that so."
The wide-mouthed frog reached a river, and here was a long green slimy creature with huge jaws. (Open mouth very wide and say) "Hello, I'm a wide-mouth frog, what are you, and what do you eat?"
"I'm an alligator and I eat wide-mouth frogs."
(Speak with mouth very slightly opened, bit like a cats bum and say)  "Oh", said the wide- mouth frog, "you don't see many of those, do you."

26/10/2012 at 20:12

yes, it does work better visually

26/10/2012 at 21:31

I went to the doctor and said "Doctor, you've got to help me, I'm in a terrible state - I can't stop myself singing "The Green, Green Grass of Home" at all hours of the day and night".

So the doctor says "Don't worry about it, I know just what that is - It's called "Tom Jones syndrome".

So I said "Tom Jones syndrome ? I've never heard of that, is it very common ?

And the Doctor says "Well ... It's not unusual "

One of Tommy Cooper's finest.

27/10/2012 at 01:39

What's an asthmatic's favourite song? Every breathe you take.

27/10/2012 at 02:18

What's the difference between Bing Crosby and Walt Disney?

Bing sings,

and Walt Disney.

 

27/10/2012 at 09:44

What goes 100 bump 100 bump 100 bump?

A centipede with an erection.

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