Why does a lack of self esteem seem so endemic

in individuals in the UK?

1 to 20 of 127 messages
kittenkat    pirate
08/02/2012 at 12:58

Just look at the multitude of reality tv programs focusing on this. Look on forums, talk to people.

Are we just politely self depreciating in the UK, or we are driven by outside influences or I'm just imagining it?

How important is the way you look, your physical form, to your self esteem?

What about the way you think?

Are we too centered on our sense of self?

I'm speaking very generally of course, it just popped into my head with all these programs on tv etc

Dave The Ex- Spartan    pirate
08/02/2012 at 13:00
No one forces you to watch them
kittenkat    pirate
08/02/2012 at 13:07
Dave The Ex- Spartan wrote (see)
No one forces you to watch them
What? Shagging?
kittenkat    pirate
08/02/2012 at 13:09

The other thing I heard in the media this week which I thought was interesting was Dawn French (lost about 6 stone I think) saying that she missed her old body and hadn't been with her new body long enough to know how she felt about it.

Dave The Ex- Spartan    pirate
08/02/2012 at 13:15

To watch any so called reality show...

If you ignore them they will go away.... Like wise if the tango'd blondes living on their husbands earning stop buying wages stopped buy "Hello" or "OK" they will die out.....

So switch off your TV and go and do something more interesting instead

kittenkat    pirate
08/02/2012 at 13:17
Dave The Ex- Spartan wrote (see)

To watch any so called reality show...

If you ignore them they will go away.... Like wise if the tango'd blondes living on their husbands earning stop buying wages stopped buy "Hello" or "OK" they will die out.....

So switch off your TV and go and do something more interesting instead

You've missed my point Dave.

The TV shows are just buying into this lack of self esteem, I'm asking is it prevalent in our society.

kittenkat    pirate
08/02/2012 at 13:18
Just switching the tv off or not opening a mag isn't going to make people feel good about themselves... so what will?
kittenkat    pirate
08/02/2012 at 13:18

If indeed that many people feel bad in the first place.

Do they?

Dave The Ex- Spartan    pirate
08/02/2012 at 13:20
If they watch that drivel or read that drivel they deserve all they get...
kittenkat    pirate
08/02/2012 at 13:21
Dave The Ex- Spartan wrote (see)
If they watch that drivel or read that drivel they deserve all they get...
I'm going to beat your head against a brick wall.

Forget the media, take it out of the equation and answer the question!
Tommygun2    pirate
08/02/2012 at 13:22
Don't ask me i'm just a chubby jogger who will never reach the potential I should because I lack the confidence to stick at things.
kittenkat    pirate
08/02/2012 at 13:25
Tommygun2 wrote (see)
Don't ask me i'm just a chubby jogger who will never reach the potential I should because I lack the confidence to stick at things.

Confidence or really deep down you don't want to stick at things?

I sometimes realise that I don't want the end product enough and therefore give up.

Dave The Ex- Spartan    pirate
08/02/2012 at 13:29

Isn't  banging heads against walls considered foreplay down your neck of the world ?

Answer the question ?  I don't really give a toss, I set my own golas for myself and as a family we set common goals, and as none of us read trash mags or watch reality TV (you can forgive Sprog 4 her Neighbours obsession cos she's a student),

If your self esteem is so low that reading rubbish or watching rubbish makes them feel better, the sooner they die out the better

08/02/2012 at 13:29
I'm not going to tell you what I reckon because nobody thinks what I say is worth listening to anyway.
Crash Hamster    pirate
08/02/2012 at 13:31

OK, I'll have a go...

I reckon that self-esteem comes from pride in a good job done; it doesn't really matter what this job is, it's just the inner acknowledgement that you've worked hard and achieved something. If you're Richard Branson, it might be pride in creating a multi-million pound business from nothing; if you're old Mr or Mrs Goggins, it might be pride in keeping a beautiful house or garden; whatever it is, it has to be something you've achieved through your own hard work and dedication over a period of time.

Nowadays, it's easy enough to exist without having to work hard, so the challenges which give self-esteem have to be actively sought out...and a lot of people would rather sit on the sofa, watch the screen and eat doughnuts. (It's OK, I'm eating a banana not a doughnut )

No challenge, no hard work, no achievemetn, no quiet pride, no self-esteem.

I have a list, it lives only in my head, but I take it out sometimes, read the contents and remind myself that I'm always up for a challenge

Tommygun2    pirate
08/02/2012 at 13:31

If something is to hard to do, then it's not worth doing. You just stick that guitar in the closet next to your shortwave radio, your karate outfit and your unicycle and we'll go inside and watch TV. --Homer Simpson

kittenkat    pirate
08/02/2012 at 13:36
Dave The Ex- Spartan wrote (see)

Isn't  banging heads against walls considered foreplay down your neck of the world ?

Answer the question ?  I don't really give a toss, I set my own golas for myself and as a family we set common goals, and as none of us read trash mags or watch reality TV (you can forgive Sprog 4 her Neighbours obsession cos she's a student),

If your self esteem is so low that reading rubbish or watching rubbish makes them feel better, the sooner they die out the better

The question wasn't about watching tv programs or reading mags!

And no, we play with carrots for foreplay. 

kittenkat    pirate
08/02/2012 at 13:38
Crash Hamster wrote (see)

OK, I'll have a go...

I reckon that self-esteem comes from pride in a good job done; it doesn't really matter what this job is, it's just the inner acknowledgement that you've worked hard and achieved something. If you're Richard Branson, it might be pride in creating a multi-million pound business from nothing; if you're old Mr or Mrs Goggins, it might be pride in keeping a beautiful house or garden; whatever it is, it has to be something you've achieved through your own hard work and dedication over a period of time.

Nowadays, it's easy enough to exist without having to work hard, so the challenges which give self-esteem have to be actively sought out...and a lot of people would rather sit on the sofa, watch the screen and eat doughnuts. (It's OK, I'm eating a banana not a doughnut )

No challenge, no hard work, no achievemetn, no quiet pride, no self-esteem.

I have a list, it lives only in my head, but I take it out sometimes, read the contents and remind myself that I'm always up for a challenge

I agree, on any level the satisfaction of completing something and doing it well, gives a sense of purpose and fulfillment.
Ultra AJH    pirate
08/02/2012 at 13:40

Weight and self esteem issues are rife.

You can see why though. Come on here and say you are struggling to lose weight and someone who thinks they are better than you will jump in and start going on about how if you excercise more and eat less you will lose weight, yeah it really is that simple.

Yes, of course it is that simple.......as long as you take away the complex emotions that go along with food for so many people.

Dave The Ex- Spartan    pirate
08/02/2012 at 13:41

I also said we set common goals or individual ones within our family....

You seemed to equate lack of self esteem with reading trash mags or watching reality TV (apart from reading RW once in a while I don't read trash mags)

Some of us have entered an IM race this year

My oh has announced she will go sub 2 hrs for a half marathon this year

Sprogs 2 and 2.5 have set themselves the target of renovating a derelict farm to live in.....

and so on, we don't live in a family that hasn't always got some project on the go..

even if it is not buying sarnies for lunch but making something at home to take in...

I'll see your carrot and raise you a parsnip 

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