Liverpool manager Gerard Houllier sends scouts out round the World looking
for a new striker to replace Emile Heskey and hopefully win Liverpool the
title.
One of his scouts informs him of a young Iraqi striker who he thinks will
turn out to be a true superstar. So Gerard flies to Iraq to watch him and
is
suitably impressed and arranges for him to come over to Anfield.
Two weeks later Liverpool are 4-0 down at home to Man Utd with only 20
minutes left. Houllier gives the young Iraqi striker the nod to go on and
he
takes off Emile Heskey.
The lad is a sensation, scores 5 in 20 minutes and wins the game for
Liverpool. The fans are delighted, the players and coaches are delighted
and
the media love the new star.
When he comes off the pitch he phones his Mum to tell her about his first
day in English football. "Hi Mum, guess what?" he says. "I played for 20
minutes today, we were 4-0 down but I scored 5 and we won. Everybody loves
me, the fans, the players and the media, they all love me".
"Great," says his Mum, "let me tell you about my day. Your father got shot
in the street, your sister and I were mugged and beaten and your brother
has
joined a gang of looters, while you were having a great time".
The young lad is very upset. "What can I say Mum, but I'm so sorry".
"Sorry!" says his Mum, "It's your bloody fault that we moved to Liverpool
in
the first place!"
