I started a thread for my FLM t-shirt last year - these were some of the best entries - including the last one that I ended up wearing, although I really wanted to go for Swerve's (just was't brave enough)
Swerve - "Please kill me. I am in appalling pain and it would be the kindest thing to do."
Bulldog Baxter - "Veni, Vidi, volo in domum redire." (I came, I saw, I want to go home.)
Vader - 'This lap of honour is killing me....'
Bill S - "I am a bomb disposal expert - if you see me running try to keep up..."
Floosie Sue - "If you can read this you must be last"