'Mature' runners.

Older runners meet here.

141 to 160 of 139,132 messages
29/01/2003 at 14:21
Did that come under "Any other biscuits"?
29/01/2003 at 14:30
JJ - but runners will hesitate to eat the sugar and biccies.

I, on the other hand, will not, as I am a little piglet.

Therefore, please send all prize sugar and biccies to me :)

29/01/2003 at 14:33
<<<piglet squeals in alarm!>>>

Oh, JJ <tremble>..... I don't like that p...p....po..... nasty word.

<piglet turns tail and trots away, crying>

trot trot trot
trot trot trot
trot trot trot


<sound of distant snuffling>


29/01/2003 at 14:44

As an older runner I would have thought you'd recognise me from when you had to watch tv in the 60's with your brood. Arch enemy of that do-gooding bunch the Tracy gang. Able to control folk with an evil stare and 300000 pages of HR training recommendations as provided by my new disiciple.

Piglet come back, no-one really eats P**** S*****ings, they just talk about them and spit out bits of their teeth. Don't worry - just concentrate on having a good chew on the action pig, or whatever else you want to do to/with him
29/01/2003 at 15:10
<sniffle, snuffle>

<piglet wipes snout on JJ's sleeve>

Ok, then! I'm back!!! Hehe hehehehehe <hic>...

Meerkat - many thanks for the Action Pig wrapped in the HH Wicking Undies: a v. cunning ploy indeed :)

<munch munch>

The Action Pig tastes great, but the HH Wicking Undies are a little bit stringy.

Right, I'm off to relax in the trough with a good book :)
29/01/2003 at 15:21
Here you go, JJ.

<piglet profers trotter draped with little bits of semi masticated wicking undies>

Enjoy :-)

No, really! You're welcome :-)
29/01/2003 at 16:30
JJ whereabouts did you do your swinging in the 60's.
29/01/2003 at 17:14
sfh, I remember you. There was anaccompaniment everywhere you went, an assistant who used to say, "Eeeet will be a greaaaat disaaaaaster" And, of course, it was. I had a crush on Scott. Can you believe it - on a puppet??????
29/01/2003 at 17:20
Hey, they've been writing poems on the fat thread. Why dont we do something cultural like that??

Not me obviously. I'm an eejit but wee piglet and Helen Wheels look creative, windswept and interesting types.

Reckon Meerkat could rustle up a haiku or two as well.

Now how does it go?

"I wondered lonely as a runner....."
29/01/2003 at 17:22
wandered even! (ahem!)
29/01/2003 at 17:25
Marriott Edgar


There's a famous seaside town called Blackpool,
That's noted for fresh air and fun,
And Mr and Mrs Ramsbottom
Went there with young Albert, their son.

-= o =-

A grand little lad was young Albert
All dressed in his best; quite a swell
With a stick with an 'orse's 'ead 'andle
The finest that Woolworth's could sell.

-= o =-

They didn't think much to the Ocean
The waves, they were fiddlin' and small
There was no wrecks and nobody drownded
Fact, nothing to laugh at, at all.

-= o =-

So, seeking for further amusement
They paid and went to the zoo
Where they'd lions and tigers and camels
And old ale and sandwiches too.

-= o =-

There were one great big lion called Wallace
His nose were all covered with scars
He lay in a somnolent posture
With the side of his face on the bars.

-= o =-

Now Albert had heard about lions
How they was ferocious and wild
To see Wallace lying so peaceful
Well, it didn't seem right to the child.

-= o =-

So straight 'way the brave little feller
Not showing a morsel of fear
Took his stick with its 'orse's 'ead 'andle
And shoved it in Wallace's ear.

-= o =-

You could see the lion didn't like it
For giving a kind of a roll
He pulled Albert inside the cage with 'im
And swallowed the little lad 'ole

-= o =-

Then Pa, who had seen the occurrence
And didn't know what to do next
Said "Mother! Yon lions 'et Albert"
And Mother said "Well, I am vexed!"

-= o =-

Then Mr and Mrs Ramsbottom
Quite rightly, when all's said and done
Complained to the Animal Keeper
That the lion had eaten their son.

-= o =-

The keeper was quite nice about it
He said "What a nasty mishap
Are you sure it's your boy he's eaten?"
Pa said "Am I sure? There's his cap!"

-= o =-

The manager had to be sent for
He came and he said "What's to do?"
Pa said "Yon lion's 'et Albert
And 'im in his Sunday clothes, too."

-= o =-

Then Mother said, "Right's right, young feller
I think it's a shame and a sin
For a lion to go and eat Albert
And after we've paid to come in."

-= o =-

The manager wanted no trouble
He took out his purse right away
Saying "How much to settle the matter?"
And Pa said "What do you usually pay?"

-= o =-

But Mother had turned a bit awkward
When she thought where her Albert had gone
She said "No! someone's got to be summonsed"
So that was decided upon.

-= o =-

Then off they went to the Police Station
In front of the Magistrate chap
They told 'im what happened to Albert
And proved it by showing his cap.

-= o =-

The Magistrate gave his opinion
That no one was really to blame
And he said that he hoped the Ramsbottoms
Would have further sons to their name.

-= o =-

At that Mother got proper blazing
"And thank you, sir, kindly," said she
"What waste all our lives raising children
To feed ruddy lions? Not me!"


29/01/2003 at 17:33
Didnt think it would all fit in

(and how many times have I said THAT!!??)
29/01/2003 at 17:36
Merkat, I think I have posted elsewhere about "Ron the pod" - expensive but illuminating, and my next pic will probably be my "Fat Little Ankles", cos I don't know many men who get paid lots of money for drawing lines on women's legs and then being allowed to take photos of same. Honest Mum, it's 'Science'!

He didn't tell me I was mad, so "FLA" is still on for the FLM, but not, sadly the Watford Half.
29/01/2003 at 17:38
Chimp - my favourite closing lines. I will resist the urge to post poetry until I get home, and as I'm now officially a 'girly' you may not like what I post - it's a bit drippy. Now that would be a nice wind up for the hooligan thread... thinks... evile grin... :)
29/01/2003 at 17:41
Yes, there are some bitter and twisted individuals on the thread but I just put that down to jealousy.

As with most things, I rise above it.
29/01/2003 at 17:44
As long as its not Wendy bloody Cope Helen. There's girly and there's emetic.

29/01/2003 at 17:45
29/01/2003 at 17:48
Wendy Cope. She writes daubs.

Hey, Humph3 thinks he knows you (Croydon thread)

29/01/2003 at 17:49
If I had my life to live over, I'd try to make more mistakes next time.I would relax. I would limber up.
I would be sillier than I have on this trip.
I would be crazier. I would be less hygienic.
I would take more chances, I would take more trips.
I would climb more mountains, swim more rivers, and watch more sunsets.
I would burn more gasoline. I would eat more ice cream and less beans.
I would have more actual troubles and fewer imaginary ones.
You see, I am one of those people who lives prophylactically and sensibly and sanely, hour after hour, day after day.
Oh, I have had my moments
And if I had it to do over again, I'd have more of them.
In fact, I'd try to have nothing else.
Just moments,one after another.
Instead of living so many years ahead each day.
I have been one of those people who never go anywhere without a thermometer, a hot water bottle, a gargle, a raincoat, and a parachute.
If I had to do it over again, I would go places and do things.
I'd travel lighter than I have.
If I had my life to live over, I would start barefooted earlier in the spring and stay that way later in the fall.
I would play hooky more. I wouldn't make such good grades except by accident.
I would ride on merry-go-rounds.

I'd pick more daisies!

(Authorship attributed to many people.)
29/01/2003 at 17:50
Never heard of Wendy Cope - try the above.
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