Terror on the Towpath

Are you there wolfy

41 to 60 of 144 messages
13/11/2002 at 14:12
Can someone tell me what the pheasant story is?
14/11/2002 at 13:21
Yes tell me too.
14/11/2002 at 14:23
The thread in question was on the old forums which, I believe, have now been removed (are they archived somewhere?). The pheasant story itself was not so funny but it did generate some amusing responses. Briefly, I was striding out up a steep hill early one morning (maintaining my mental self-image of an effortlessly bounding gazelle) when I became aware of a rustling in the bushes. Suddenly, out popped a pheasant which then started trotting alongside me. My instant reaction was to accelerate whereupon the pheasant accelerated and started to build up a moderately good lead. By this time I was sprinting but before I could catch up the pheasant tossed me a dismissive sideways glance and disappeared back into the bushes. By this stage I was exhausted and pondered the rationality of racing poultry. The responses fell into two camps, those that had no desire to race anything at all, and those who thought my behaviour completely normal and who had a similar story to tell. Of the latter my favourite was the person who found himself racing a paper bag that was being blown about.

So that's the "pheasant story", I'm sorry if it doesn't satisfy your heightened state of expectation (but I'm sure my original post was funnier).
14/11/2002 at 14:32
It was every bit as funny as I thought it was going to be! Thank you for cheering up my boring Thursday afternoon David.
14/11/2002 at 14:36
DavidB. Are you Mr LizzyB?
14/11/2002 at 14:40
DavidB, you original story lives on


14/11/2002 at 14:41
I of course meant your not you

Can't quite believe that link worked!

14/11/2002 at 15:11
Pansie: you are most welcome.
Chimp: not yet (but if Lizzy is interested...)
Ironman: many thanks, had I found this I could have saved some time; as for putting you instead of your, many of us have been pleading for the old edit facility to be restored. Mind you, this may have deprived us of Master Fox's brilliantly lucid contribution to this forum (only kidding Rohan).
14/11/2002 at 15:16
Thank you I sometimes race canal boats, but that is really sad
14/11/2002 at 15:23
Freaky Its only sad if you lose.
14/11/2002 at 15:57
Er, I race aeroplanes. Not as they are speeding along the runway for take-off, but when I see once coming into land I try to get to a certain point before they hit the runway. This is what happens when you live next to an airfield and have too much time on your hands.

Curious Chimp - Nope, no relation to DavidB. Anyway, I could never relate myself to someone raced pheasants! The man needs to show some class and race ptarmigan at the very least...... :). And win.
14/11/2002 at 18:34
Emus would be more impressive!
14/11/2002 at 18:59
BTW LizzyB, if you were married to DavidB, I was going to ask him if he has any photos of you in your buff (not what you think folks!!) on your wobble board, reading a book with one finger on the wall, preferably one when he's tried to push you off Cato-style. Maybe the RW photographers would be interested. Now that WOULD make a cover!!

14/11/2002 at 19:12
I race cars going to work.

There is a cycle track that runs alongside (but separated from) a busy road to where I work.

I time it so it is at the peak of rush hour and I can usually move faster than the traffic (but still need to put in the odd spurt of pace to keep ahead). I resist the temptation to wave at the frustrated drivers, but they know and I know that I am going to get to work before them and in a better mood.

(The only time I get beaten is during half term school holidays when the traffic is less)

Not in the same league as the tow-path or the pheasant story but seems to fit in to the thread.
15/11/2002 at 07:09
Chimp - Mmmn, a picture of a red setter on a wobble board on the cover of the next issue of Runner's World or a picture of some bloke at a race adjusting his tackle in a car park (as suggested on another thread a few days ago. I just can't decide....

15/11/2002 at 08:16
Chimp: Just because we are not married, doesn't mean I don't have the photos!

Lizzy: Sorry I'm not classy enough for you, I tried racing grouse last August but they panicked when the starting pistol was fired.
15/11/2002 at 08:26
I dont mind them adjusting their tackle. Its just the obvious glee that accompanies rubbing vaseline on the b*ggers that gets me.

Nah sorry, the wobble board gets my vote.
15/11/2002 at 12:35
I'll tell Steve Seaton that an overwhelming majority of readers want 'real life' running scenarios on the cover of the mag.

So, we have 'wobble board' and 'adjusting tackle' so how about ...

- Man/woman getting changed in small car after coming to evening race straight from work.

- Runner vomiting during fell race

- Runner tripping over sheep grid/sheep during fell race

- Face of runner failing to get pb

- Runner lost during fell race and having to hitch as lift back to the start

- Runner adjusting belt of heart rate monitor while confused motorist looks on (would work best using a female runner)

.... any more?

DavidB - try firing the gun straight at the grouse and you'll beat them easily ....
15/11/2002 at 12:44
Jodie Swallow (I'm not giving up on this you know)

Jodie Swallow on a wobble board.

Jodie Swallow chasing an emu

Jodie Swallow with a bum bag

When is someone going to take the hint!!!
15/11/2002 at 12:50
er, Jodie who?
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