Unfunny Comments!

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11/09/2004 at 18:36
What about those annoying and unfunny comments that we runners endure when out for a run i.e 'fun faster'...if I have heard that once I have heard it a thousand times !
If I am going to get heckled at for my running then please say something original to make me laugh !
Has anyone any funny stories or killer comeback remarks ?
Would love to hear them !
11/09/2004 at 18:51
Recent heckles that I've received:

"Get those knees up, slaphead!" - a bunch of young kids giving sound postural advice.

"You WILL finish that marathon!" - from another young lad, who was impressed to hear that I've actually finished four already.

"Blimey, look at the tits on that!" - from a bunch of young teenage girls. Yes, they were talking about me.

"Come on No 548, you can still win this one, y'know!" - from a spectator during a recent 10K. I finished in 51 minutes. Only 15 behind the actual winner.
11/09/2004 at 18:53
I was visiting my parents in Torquay one year and went for a run the same day it was the London Marathon. Someone yelled " did you take a wrong turning and get lost ?" !!!
11/09/2004 at 18:55
During a run a week before the FLM,

"Will you finish with the rest of them then?"
11/09/2004 at 18:57
Not long to go (in a race just after the starting gun has started)
11/09/2004 at 19:00
That is a good one !
11/09/2004 at 19:10
Any chance of a free holiday runningnut?


...shouted at me once from a car passing at 70mph. Why bother? I suppose if you're stupid enough to think it would be funny/clever to shout something at a runner then you're probably too stupid to realise that your comment wont be heard at that sort of speed. I hope he's had good fortune with the rest of his life. Dog knows he clearly needs it, the stupid ****.
11/09/2004 at 19:15
Hey Dodge,
You want a free holiday to a place where they eat grits, fried chicken, fried chicken and more fried chicken, talk with a very big "twaaaang" and live , eat and breathe the bible ?????
And that is just the tip of the iceberg....I could go on and on....!
11/09/2004 at 19:24
If the word "free" can be strategically placed amongst that lot then I like fried chicken, don't mind twangs (even those of the twaaaang variety) and if they eat and breathe the Bible well good for them [must make a nice change from eating grit :) ]
11/09/2004 at 19:36
Hey Dodge,
Who is that photo of ? If it is you, you are very advanced for your age ;)
11/09/2004 at 20:43
Don't like sexual comments shouted at me from slow moving vehicles and even more annoying is those who decide to beeb their horns as they approach from behind-I've nearly slipped off the curb through jumping before!

The worst comment I had was actually while tri training on my bike. I pulled up by some traffic lights along side, dare I say it a white van! Two guys inside, one leans out and says "I wish I was that saddle you're sat on so you could ride me like that"! I kid you not!! I was so embarrassed I was lost for words!
11/09/2004 at 20:46
But if you were a saddle you wouldn't really enjoy it, would you? I mean, you'd just feel used. He just hadn't thought it through (A bit like Prince Charles - Hang on, Hilly, did he have big ears?).
11/09/2004 at 23:11
Doing intervals on the local track, I got "Get a move on grandad!". Fair doos!
11/09/2004 at 23:37
As well as the usual 'Look at the arse/tits on that' I do often get 'Run Forrest, Run!' too. Actually the lad who shouted it from the passenger seat of his mate's car the other night had the accent off to a tee - I was quite impressed!
12/09/2004 at 01:37
I heard that a good comeback for the "Run Forest Run " comment is to shout back that you are looking for Bubba !!
iron fraggle    pirate
12/09/2004 at 09:20
Teenage girl 'you're not running very fast' me 'that's because I'm old and fat' kind of took the wind out of her sails.

Bloke (the usual fat old git type) shouted a few 'funny' comments at me a few weeks ago, so on my way back past him 30 mins later I stopped him and gave him a piece of my mind. He said I was stupid and making a complete fool of myself whereupon I completely lost it and used words I hope my children never hear me say!!!!

(note to self - do not go running an hour after taking decongestant tablets as they make you a bit jittery and uptight!!)
12/09/2004 at 15:14
I haven't been wolf whistled at for a while, although I did have a 'nice legs' not so long a go.

This summer got a "you're not very fast" from a teenage girl (with her fella), she was somewhat surprised when I stopped and replied "race yer then"

In fairness to the yoof who hang around outside 7-11 in my village I don't get any comments, although having replies about does their mum know they're out / have you done your homework / isn't it past your bedtime ready do help.

As for van/escort drivers I find a "f**k off, c**t," normally suffices.

My main gripe is the non-indicators - lose count how many times a gave the w**ker signal, andthat was just this morning....

No honest , I'm a happy runner :D

12/09/2004 at 15:26
Ohhhhh non indicators are very annoying...and drivers who don't move out of the way for you and treat you as if you have no right to be on "their" road.
I have just got back from a long run and was nearly run off the road a fair few times : grrrrrrrr !
12/09/2004 at 16:12
A pitying look followed by "What a sad ****!", said about them rather than at them, is often best. Aim to belittle them rather than rising to their bait. It would be nice to have a gun sometimes though. The look on someone's face when you shoot them through the knee is priceless.

12/09/2004 at 18:25
no funny comments for me other than the usual already mentioned above. some thing that does stand out though was last years great north run. a woman with a plackard saying "less than half way to go now" really cheered me up until about half a mile later i saw the official half way marker! if my legs would have let me i would have gone back and whacked her with her plackard! not a happy bunny was i.
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