Anti-depressants & training

so why am I so down?

on the surface I don't seem to have reason to be.
I've got a job I enjoy and the company seems to be growing well as one of the leaders in its field. I've been here 12 months, this week, and the I don't have to work stupid hours. I run a team of 7 and we work the odd miracle - like hitting the deadlines I've said we will. This is about to increase to around 20+ for the next 12 months.
I've been married for 12 years and been in a stable relationship for over 15 years now. We have our ups and downs, but that's part of life and relationships, you agreee to take the rough with the smooth and look for a balance but hope to come out ahead over time.
The kids, lets call them Sports boy and Dino boy, drive me up the wall. They're kids, they don't understand my priorities and life. They always have time to share something with me, they are happy, well behaved, intelligent children. I wouldn't be without them now we've got them.
We've got a nice home, and its being paid for.

So the basics seem to point to a good life.

depression can also be thought of as a chemical illness SO
its not the whole picture, but---

may be I'm just mad as a frog! :-D

Depression is a serious physical illness, Staggers. It's not just a bad dose of unhappiness. If you'd developed, say, multiple sclerosis, you wouldn't be looking in your life for what could have caused it, though you might look at your family history. It's the same with depression.

The opposite side of the coin is that I've had times when life has been pretty unpleasant and I haven't much cared whether or not I woke up in the morning, but haven't developed depression. That's not due to any personal talent for positive thinking, it's because I'm not genetically predisposed.

Don't let thinking "what have I got to be depressed about" undermine your self-esteem. That way of looking at it is miles wide of the mark unless you DO have a huge piece of unfinished business hanging over your head.

Best of luck XXX

Ok, maybe a pressed post when I was still thinking through the negatives and the history bits...

I've had serious depression before - alluded to earlier. When I was 21, suffered a major crisis of self confidence over..... women. Nuff said in the short term, sufficient to say I got very down plus there was pressure from home to succeed at poly. I was a senior student, i.e. I was a non-fresher in campus halls there to help the freshers., and also in a group of friends where I was the older person who everyone talked to for advice and support.

I got more and more feed-up and one evening sat in the union hall during a disco, just out of it. I went back to my room and sat there with a razor blade and... and nothing, some one had followed me and sat down, took it off me and gently told me to get some sleep.

I just got up one day and realised I couldn't cope any more- I was shaking so much I couldn't hold a cup of coffee! So some of my friends basically said go to the doctors or we'll take you. They diagnosed depression and put me on tablets (can't remember what) and sent me to see a psychiatrist. It took two years and withdrawing from my course just prior to finals and retaking the whole year to get through this.

On the strange things happen line, whilst I was just about two weeks into this depression I was in the union bar with the indoor cricket team I played for when we got talking to some people sat near some friends. One of this new group was an attractive girl who thought we were all nuts (probably true). The next Friday she was there again and we got talking and I bought her a drink. I'm still buy her drinks and remember to get flowers....

that ends a bit of old history. I need a break before I can manage to write more at the moment/

:o)

I just had a giggle at a little song I made up:

Ready?


# boom-boom boom-boom - SO's blue! #



Or do you have to be very old to appreciate it?

not sure about being old (that would be rude to insinuate a lady was old), just on the same wavelength.....
...and I'm not. You've lost me Jj.

:o(

Oh.

It was the old Esso advert on telly.

#boom-boom boom-boom, Esso Blue#





feel silly now...

don't, cos I could think of the "I'm blue, dab a doo" song and that wasn't long ago. Remember Esso blue but not the adverts. That and a tiger in your tank.

think of me as the li'l leopard in yours!

:o)

(((((((((((Jj)))))))))))

jokulating aside, I feel pretty sh!t today and its getting worse. I'm just sitting staring at the keyboaard, I can't focus on anything

SO, I've been watching this thread but not posting. Don't think I can say anything useful here in fact, perhaps just to note that I had that can't focus feeling when on prozac a few years back.

If you ever want to email me please feel free - I always answer.

Thanks Glenn.

lost the plot at the moment, I'm not adding anything to the sum total of usefulness today

SO: that's just life. As long as you're doing as little harm as possible you're doing better than most people.

Well said, Glenn.

Though my worst-scenario epitaph would be "she was harmless".

Mine would be: 'who?'

at the moment I think "Why?"

bluh, wallowing a bit today. I'm going to go get some food and maybe look at the sun...

oh dear, mood chnage time. Feeling feed up and cynical now, not good as I'm supposed to be going to a meeting to provide a way forward to another project. Comments like "well you should have thought of that" will not help.