Mental illness and running

I wanted a place where we could get advice and support.

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21/04/2012 at 14:05
*trails mud into the thread*

Well the brownies are in the oven.

Want me to bury work for you too?
21/04/2012 at 14:55

Whoop whoop!

I feel I deserve brownies after staring at a computer screen for at least 45 minutes, may be even 50.

The work cannot be buried sadly, it has to be done.

Did you go for a run? Or eat?

21/04/2012 at 15:06
Erm .... I've not done either yet. In fact I've completely wasted today so far (should have done some work for you!)

*traipses off to look in the fridge again*
21/04/2012 at 16:15

Wasted? That's a bit judgemental. Be kinder to yourself, it might mean you eat something.

I'm going to go buy some brownies or something sweet because my workload demands it (in an avoidant way).

21/04/2012 at 16:26
I'll tell you a secret *whispers* I don't like chocolate cake. You can have my share. *Looks around to see if anyone called the men in white coats*
Have eaten now, decided that was most likely to be the sensible option! Should probably go for a walk or a bimble but I don't want to, maybe will open the curtains as a compromise - wow my life is so rock and roll!

21/04/2012 at 17:36

You're not alone SOLB. I've met plenty (well, not plenty, at least 1) of people who don't like chocolate cake. As far as I'm aware, it's not a psychiatric disorder. I think wearing odd socks is a disorder of some kind, but I'm not sure what category it's in yet.

Sensible is sometimes good. Ok, so curtains open? How's outside looking? Not particularly inviting, I know, but if you put on coat you could go for a brief stroll? A bit of fresh air and just being outside may help a little...

21/04/2012 at 17:48
Curtains are open, looks pretty good actually - late afternoon sunshine weakly beating down. Can't escape without passing the neighbour who is hovering about the doorstep as usual, my compromise wait until it's dusky then pop out for a bit cos he'll be in a drunken heap and I'm not scared of the dark. Was supposed to go and see my parents and spotty dog today but I'm too anti-social. I'm not really sick now, all of this sounds worse than it is. I'm actually much better which is why I'm starting to feel guilty about the stuff I'm supposed to be doing.
I HAVE A PAIR OF SOCKS ON just call me little miss normality
How's work going? Done?
21/04/2012 at 18:15

You've got sunshine? Nice.

With the neighbour, you could always see if he's taken in the note and just see if he'll respect your wishes. And if he doesn't, you don't have to feel bad about blanking/ignoring/walking away from him. 

The best way to deal with guilt is by pushing it out of your head (using cake, alcohol or years aggressive defense mechanisms). No, that's not right. I mean, the guilt's only going to get worse the more you avoid something, so don't. (I'm glad you're feeling better though).

Wearing a pair of socks doesn't make you normal, it just makes you a worthwhile human being (I'm pretty hardline on this).

The work won't be done till next week when I've got the deadline. I've just got some feedback which has made things much, much worse. I should probably go deal with that.

21/04/2012 at 19:00
Wow you are hardline indeed, luckily I have a not so secret thing for cool socks so I'll stay in your good books for a while
Grr to problematic feedback; I've just drowned some guilt in my teapot ... want me to lob the feedback in too?

How are we celebrating next week? Virtual party?!
21/04/2012 at 20:12

Cool socks are where all the cool kids are at.

It's ok, I'm going to crush this feedback with my mind-vice.

The deadline is Friday, so still a few more days. The only plan I have is to sleep, so I can sleep through the virtual party and you could do the oh-so-mature thing to draw a moustache or rude words on me while I sleep (virtually).

21/04/2012 at 22:03


I love the idea of virtual graffiti


Your fears may be  irrational, but your posts on here have a whole lot of logic and sense!

I think that this thread of yours is a good friendly place, and on here, you are able to talk to all kinds of people. Would you talk to me in the street? [The little animated cartoon is of me, but I am 6'2"]

Tomorrow I am going to do something scary. I am going to sing a song I have written - but that is not the really scary bit, I have done that sort of thing before.

The scary bit is I am going to introduce it by playing it on the guitar. I have never played my guitar in public before. As an axman I am a real beginner. But you have to start somewhere (gulp!)

21/04/2012 at 22:35

Hi David,

I particularly like the virtual part of the graffiti.

I think that's brave performing in public like that, even more so considering you're not confident on the guitar. Good luck for tomorrow, I hope it goes well!

21/04/2012 at 23:07
Made me laugh too {)

I guess you're right, I probably wouldn't talk to you on the street. I don't speak very often in real life - though of those forumites I've met those that I trust on the forum I trust in real life too. I have never met such a genuine set of people before.

It isn't just me who finds the neighbour difficult, the crisis team have found him really difficult when they've been visiting me and even the OT has gone on record describing him as 'creepy.'

I'd be petrified to sing a song I'd written, well I'd be petrified to sing at all - though that might have more to do with being a tone deaf monkey than anything else. I'm full of admiration for you playing the guitar in public too Will you pop on tomorrow to let us know how it went?

I am really glad today is over, I'm going to make a real effort to have a more normal routine tomorrow; starting with breakfast and a bimble! I think the storm has passed and now I need to make sure I don't get stuck surveying the damage. I really need to get back on my feet as soon as possible and a routine of sorts will help - though next week is a bit tricky cos I have so many different medical appointments I need to be a bit flexible. I think I'm going to have to take a sleeping tablet tonight otherwise I'll be up all night rehearsing the way I want to do things tomorrow - visualisation is helpful unless it leaves you so exhausted you can't do anything!!

I really am impressed Big D, will send you virtual support (and a virtual tash or two for your audience to help reduce the nerves!)

22/04/2012 at 09:11

It sounds like the neighbour is a creep. Best just to nod and smile in his general direction.

Yes big D,  let us know how it's gone?

How's the routine going SOLB? Had breakfast and gone outside? It's sunny here so that means it's sunny everywhere. I've only just had breakfast myself but will be out in an hour or so.

22/04/2012 at 12:20
Epic fail ... just gonna scrape myself off the floor and do as much as I can today. Tomorrow is a whole new start

Tomorrow is a little tricky from a routine point of view cos I have the big scary meeting (with psychiatrist, key worker, therapist, OT and crisis team), therapy & the spirometry thing all in the morning but I can still get the basics in.

Onwards any upwards as they say

How's it going Big D? Were you performing in church or is this an evening gig?

I'm thinking of all my forum friends out running and supporting today - can't wait to hear all the happy race reports
22/04/2012 at 13:04


Tis an evening gig at church. Mrs BD is in charge.

So I hope to be able to report later on how it all goes.

I am going to be off line then, till next weekend.

22/04/2012 at 15:48

A whole week to wait in suspense?!

Today isn't a write-off SOLB, there's still time to get some good routines in! Like eating, have you eaten today?

The meeting tomorrow won't be fun, but you could make it fun. Wear a mask, repeat things people say, refuse to sit down, listen intently to everything someone says then at the end say "I didn't understand a word of that", insist on calling people by their wrong names...these will all lead you to get sectioned I'm pretty sure, but it'll be fun!

I read someone's blog about how to be a "good patient" or being a bad one, it was really good. It made me remember me mischevious side!

22/04/2012 at 16:02
SOLB, who is your advocate? You could agree a signal with them that indicates you aren't coping. Alternatively, draw up a grid of nine squares. In each square, write a word that you think will come up/topic they will want to discuss. When each word/topic is mentioned, cross it off. Shout bingo when you have completed your card!
22/04/2012 at 16:05

Word /topic bingo is the BEST idea! That's great.

I'm going to use that in every meeting from now on. I won't keep my job but I'll have a damn good time!

22/04/2012 at 16:46


I can confirm that SOLB is fabuolous and neighbour is creepy, he appeared when I visited SOLB and scared us both by just being there. 

Hope the note does the trick. 

Ben-o you are naughty but I like your sense of fun

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