Mental illness and running

Just catching up with today's postings.  I reckon there's some medication been taken today - chatterbox pills.

Black cloud day for me really.  The rest of the week is looking like a long struggle ahead.   I did manage my walk into work.  Didn't feel up to running so walked home as well.  At least that's decent exercise - about 7 miles overall.  With the weather it might be difficult to do much more exercise this week as we're likely to be frozen up for a while.

(((LR))) Is the week looking like a struggle cos it's busy or because you are struggling a bit or both? Hang in there honey it'll get better. I smiled at the chatter box pills - I've virtual talked loads today! 

Good effort on the walk.

I'm planning to run another 2 miles tomorrow. I also have a meeting with Sally. We're going to have to talk about the social paranoia and stuff but I don't really want to now I think I'm over it. I want to know if she's made the referral to the Richmond Fellowship to talk about next steps - I have no reason to doubt the poor lady but I don't think she'll have done it. Mean Solb ... I shall report back on whether I was just being a cow or not tomorrow! 

Urgh I'm sudddenly really tired. Heading to bed before it gets too close to midnight. Night night all xxxx 

Thanks, SOLB.  I just seemed to take a downturn when I didn't manage a run yesterday - along with the thought that I wouldn't be able to get out this week.  Being busy isn't the problem - if anything it helps and it's been quieter today - which didn't help.  So it's the thought of another 4 days like that - but of course they might not be like that.  Trouble is - when in a negative mood - I tend to think they might be even worse.

Likewise - must be off.  Night all.

Ahh even those weirdy 'normals' sometimes skip or cut short a run honey, it wasn't a massive failing. Just one of those things. You'll get out on your next one or two and it'll be like it had never happened. I think that negative filter is very draining but so is the little bully on your shoulder telling you how terrible you are and how badly you've messed things up. The truth is you're making fantastic progress and holding down a job and running regularly - if you overlook your achievements and note the failures it's just not fair.How many runs have you achieved in the last month and how many did you not manage?  

I've messed up and the midnight rule wins again but I think it's OK cos I've battled ridiculously hard to keep the black mood at bay today and I've succeeded.

Be kind to yourself LR, the best advice I have ever been given is before condemning myself to think about what you would say to a friend in the same situation with the same difficulties and pressures ... it never is anywhere like as harsh as the stuff I angrily spit at myself.

Fight on LR, we're behind you every step of the way  

Right it's past midnight, I really am going to bed now xxx 

Well, SOLB, you're definitely let off the midnight rule last night because you were coming up with those supportive words for me.  I'm feeling quite rough this morning but, having just read that, will keep those words in mind today to get my through today in better shape - and hopefully heading in the right direction again.

As a one-off it does sound more appealling than a day at work - but I'm sure the appeal soon wears off.  Had a bad couple of days so haven't been joining in the words of support for you - so how are they today?

Oh dear, well I've got to dash so will leave a day long hug and hope things go OK from here   ((((by 'eck))))

Morning. 

'ecky - you are not rubbish at all!  And we don't judge people on this thread anyway.Its just the nasty depression telling you lies, and I will send SCaz with one of her best stern looks at those thoughts to drive them away for you. 

I didn't run yesterday, and haven't excercised since Thursday. I'm feeling sluggish and a bit down now which I'm sure is no coincidence so I must try and get out today. Are we doing the points thing every Sunday or a continuous weekly tally? I suppose a daily tally up to Sunday then re-set on Monday might be more motivating.

I didn't like Les Mis.  It was well done and everything, but the film just didn't work for me. I prefer the intimacy of the live show for musicals. I hadn't realised it was a faithful take on the show, so had just music and no dialogue. Live music is just more emotional somehow but I suppose if you haven't seen the stage version it might come accross better. 

omg I am exhausted today, still - it was worth it

oh by eck, as if you haven't got enough problems to deal with.  I've no idea what to suggest. 

I trust you had a good time Bear. Are you going to tell us about it? 

I hope the dietitian can help by eck. 

My gut instinct is that while the friend has good intentions and the request is understandable it's misguided. The truth is both you and Mr By Eck wish it was as simple as swapping heads but it's not. I'd feel tempted to call the friend back and gently let them know that it isn't as simple as that. Although you could tell Mr by Eck that the friend has mentioned some members have already said they would like a focused evening and don't want too many distractions. So you aren't saying you've been asked to try to get him not to be distracting but you are still warning him that they might not be happy if there's lots of digression and silliness.  I don't think there's much more you can do. 

I don't think it was very fair of the friend to ask it of you. If I was the friend I'd endeavour to nicely ask Mr by Eck to focus during the practice if need be and to accept that the other people need to be responsible for their own concentration too!

Sally hadn't made the referral to the Richmond Fellowship. It was a bit of a waste of time going to see her