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How do you get going again after pregnancy?

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23/06/2013 at 21:49

Bocketts Farm Caro - not far from Dorking.  Plenty of animals and a lot of playground too!

I do feel a bit outraged by the price whenever we go, but the kids have loved it both times (and Martha went with school too).

How much longer is your mum staying?  Mine is pretty hands off but was a lot better for our last visit.  You never know what you're going to get though!

23/06/2013 at 22:11

hoggle - I just think 'this too shall pass'. the more I make an issue over how long / how many choices, the more control she tries to exert. to be honest, she's always been quite speedy about it and now takes herself off upstairs and changes her clothes mid-morning, mid-afternoon, after school and often in between times. I end up with basketfuls of laundry though as it's invariably all got pen / food / snot on it!

it depends how good her understanding is - at this point I guess it's still not good enough to understand choices. such as - let's choose 2 tops, 2 trousers and 2 pairs of socks and take them downstairs. those are what we must choose from.

as for being cold / wearing inappropriate things for the weather - I just let her get on with it. when she gets outside and has cold legs, I whip out a pair of tights / trousers and we put them on quickly. however, she is much better at understanding that she needs to wear appropriate clothes for the weather now. it has only taken her about 2 years of experimenting to fathom that out tho!

23/06/2013 at 22:16

oh and I have before taken E into nursery with completely stupid items of clothing on, and a bag with some proper stuff in. so once she went in with a pair of shorts, a skirt and a dress that was about 3 years too big for her on (she found it in her wardrobe in a bag of handme downs - I couldn't do anything about her desire to wear it). so I packed a bag with trousers, t-shirt and socks in and asked them to persuade her to put it on at the appropriate moment. I thinks she put the trousers on eventually but the dress was still on over the top when she came home!

so if it's making you late for work, i'd just say - let her wear whatever she wants and let them have the battle later (assuming they are prepared to do that!)

23/06/2013 at 23:01

Thanks CM and CC! She often goes in a t-shirt/bare feet and I pack warmer stuff. So will just sit back with the rest of it and let her go with what she wants (and hide away things that really don't want her to wear/trash at daycare - not that there is much of that anyway!).

24/06/2013 at 01:47

Thankfully not got this problem with Max. Yay for boys!!  ;-)

Are sitting by pool listening to ocean at the moment with delicious cocktail. Bliss. Way past boys' bedtime but too nice to go home. Had to evacuate main pool as a small child put the 'poo' in 'pool' earlier and lifeguard declared 'biohazard'.  Glad it wasn't one of ours!


24/06/2013 at 13:24

 to poo in the swimming pool TTid. Aside from that it sounds like a fabulous evening, I'd love to be spending our evenings by the ocean.

Loving the talk of little madams and their ridiculous clothing choices. Anna not too bad so far although she's a proper girly girl so will often want to just wear dresses. Issie was the same and went through a phase where she flat out refused to wear anything other than dresses (although they had to be seam free as this coincided with her anti-seam phase so anything empire line style or with any seams other than those on the sides was also out).

Funny to now be entering different kind of clothes debates with Lily; like when she wants to wear really short skirts and we keep telling her to put leggings on underneath them. Not that we're buying her short skirts I should add - but over the last 3 years she's grown upwards but not outwards so the small skirts still fit her!

Caro - what are the lessons like at Larkswood, are they run by GLL? We had a really bad experience with GLL swimming lessons at LLL when Lily was little and we had teachers who basically just dragged the kids from one side of the pool to the other for 30 minutes and didn't actually teach them anything which is part of the reason I hadn't pushed Issie to do lessons before.

My mum will help out with the kids but then when she's had enough she just goes into another room and either reads the paper or plays games on her iphone! I just don't understand it, it's not as if we see her that often (maybe once every 3 or 4 weeks) so you'd think she'd want to make the most of the time with them? Hubby's mum on the other hand is fab with the kids, always making up games to play with them and talking to them. She totally wears herself out with them when she comes to stay but she loves it and they love her to bits.

24/06/2013 at 13:40

Lol to biohazard!  but also !

Mine have always been pretty reasonable about clothes - if anything Nicky is worse than Sophie!  She often complains that she doesn't know what to wear and wants me to help her choose, whereas Nicky will invariably want whatever item of clothing he sees that you haven't chosen, but fortunately we are able to just jam it on him and he gives up!  I love how CM's E has always gone out in crazy outfits - she sounds such a character!

Last ever playgroup this morning  and  - I haven't enjoyed playgroups with N so much because I couldn't be bothered to get to know anyone properly, as I already had a group of mummy friends from when Sophie was little, so they've just involved a lot of polite chat really.  Anyway, it's sort of sad because it's the end of an era.  The reason is because I'm starting my summer (July) job on Friday and will be working Mon-Fri, then N starts nursery in September every morning.

Hmm N is supposed to be having a nap but I think I can hear him pottering about upstairs...!

I felt like carp this weekend after a dodgy tummy in the night on Sat night, so had to miss my run yesterday .  Fell asleep on the sofa at 8pm last night!  Today I'm just full of cold and not very hungry, but ok otherwise.

Trying to get through Royal Ascot so I can get on with watching Wimbledon!  Now how much tennis do you think those 2 are going to let me is getting a bit ridiculous how much they monopolise the tv (currently with Thomas and Scooby Doo) but if I try to watch anything I can't hear it anyway!

I got home earlier to see a For Sale sign in our garden - we're being sponsored by the local estate agents for our PTA school summer fair, and this is a way they want to help us advertise.  It doesn't say For Sale but has details of the fair instead, but I can just imagine how much it will get the neighbours talking!

24/06/2013 at 13:44

Yes it's GLL but they are fine.  Eric has the same teacher as Matilda had for 3 yrs which is great as she is lovely, and now Matilda is in stage 3, having skipped stage 2, and also has a nice teacher.  Yes the classes are busy, I have no idea how anyone ever manages to get their child on the programme if they havent started as a tiny one and worked their way up.  They teach 50 wks a yr, and you have the option to pay annually, so I have just pid £193 for a yrs worth of classes for M, which I think isn't bad really.  Worth pursuing, esp if you could get the older 2 in classes at teh same time.

24/06/2013 at 13:59

Hi all, I've been kind of reading but not posting  as mainly been reading on my phone and it is just too fiddly. EF! Hope you are ok and not going mad with boredom, how long have you got until DD? At least you will have a good "rest" although from what I know of labour/maternity wards they are all pretty noisy. 

Congratulations I think to JT and Tatty! When are you due? 

Evie is now 4 months - how time flies when your sleep deprived. She is a joy though, so happy and smiley (most of the time) I had my first day/night out at Ascot on Friday which I am still recovering from. Not drinking for a year then going out and drinking champagne is not the best idea! 

I have a half marathon in 5 weeks time too. Don't think I will break any PBs (or even get close) but I'll be happy enough to do it comfortably. I've done a couple of 10 miles so far, then have 12 in a week or so. I'm following the FIRST programme but my speed work times are waay slower than pre-pregnancy. 

Anyway, incase anyone needs new running shoes, have a promo code to get 15% off which is SPF1315. I just got £15 off some that I've had my eye on for a while. 

Caro, shame about your Mum. I am lucky with a hands on Mum and MIL although I don't think the granddads have ever changed a nappy in their life. Second Bocketts farm. We have only been there a couple of times but it's great. 

25/06/2013 at 12:36

4 months old already - wow! and excellent re the half mara. brilliant job.

as some of you will have seen, i went to GP this morning.  she is perplexed as to what on earth is going on. she has referred me to gynae and as i have private medical insurance i will be seen very soon (in fact could have been seen tomorrow but am in birmingham for the day!). i mentioned about the cough, cold, snot etc and also said 'ah yes, my ear keeps popping whenever i blow and it's so sore and i go dizzy when it pops' and she looked in there and said 'oh god you have a massive ear infection'. hahaha. i had no idea! anyway i have antibiotics - but not the ones she wanted to prescribe as they make me vomit (lol!)

please god something positive comes out of that!

25/06/2013 at 17:08

OMG i may actually yet go absolutely bonkers. the kids' animosity towards each other has reached a new crescendo. they are arguing over every single thing ever. they hit each other constantly, hurl insults at each other non-stop, and we have just walked back from the park and they have been arguing (which results in E wailing and screaming) over which one of them is going to live with me when they are adults. SERIOUSLY!! i ended up saying 'neither of you. i don't want either of you living with me. you are driving me insane'.

i have decided to institute a new reward system with pebbles. one pebble in the pot for each insult or bad behaviour towards sibling. person with fewest pebbles at end of week gets a treat (extra TV programme, extra story in bed with me, extra time on iPad - to be chosen by winner). of course, it won't work but i feel like i have to do something or i may actually go mad.

25/06/2013 at 17:18

and then she goes and sits on the toilet doing a poo singing 'head, shoulders, knees and toes' and i think she sounds like the cutest thing ever. how can it be the same child??

25/06/2013 at 19:53

Meant to say boo to your mum, Caro, she sounds worse than my mum - at least my mum is well-intentioned, even if you have to tell her to do things instead of watching tv/having baths!

CM - yeay to the diagnosis, I really hope they get you sorted this time.  As for sibling hatred, I don't expect they hate each other, probably just a clash of personalities at this particular stage in their lives.  It sounds as though J is a very laid-back individual and E is pretty high maintenance, and, being the youngest, she must be the ultimate in irritating little sisters !  Can you also focus on positives?  Say, if they say a nice thing to each other they get a pebble removed or put in a different jar?  Even little things like saying goodnight nicely or asking each other to pass things.  Might work...

I nearly had a meltdown this evening over bl**dy teatime.  I hate that meal so much! Sophie has always been awful right from weaning and has now improved to the point where she will try things but still refuses to eat a lot of them.  And now Nicky is starting to copy her which is not good news as he is a great eater normally.  So anyway when hubby came home I had a moan to him and a cuddle, and Sophie saw so he told her she'd made Mummy sad by not eating the tea I made her.  She joined in the cuddle, then, after 2 further attempts (their plates were still on the table) she managed to eat everything.  So  in some ways but also  to why couldn't she just do that in the first place.  I'm thinking of having a "try something new" night once a week but at the same time think I'll just end up dreading that night every week!  At the moment they largely have oven unhealthy stuff with pasta/potatoes and veg, or sometimes things like oven waffles/smiley faces, which I think is a carp diet personally.  We had chicken curry with naan bread which N tried when we were eating it and said he liked it, but I bet if we'd presented him with it he would have had a meltdown and refused to try it.   Are all kids like this?  I don't really know what else to try.

Sorry for me me me!

EF - hope you're enjoying the tennis and that your TV is as fantastic as the price implies .

Anjelicals - hello and wow to 4 months, and to running a half marathon soon!  Good to hear from you.

25/06/2013 at 20:25

Yes J himself camwimp with the idea of taking pebble out if they are good and I think that is a good one. They were quite funny tonight together. For about 30 seconds

as for food - well i am lucky that they will eat things like pasta and bolognese and mild curry and casserole and stir fry. As well as pizza and stuff. I feed them whatever I am planning. They eat it or they don't. No drama. My food recycling box is often quite full tho!

25/06/2013 at 20:26

Camwimp??? Came up with!!

25/06/2013 at 21:52

Ha ha, Sophie won't eat any of those JT!  Nicky would though, and does on the occasions I make it for us and we eat it together.  We have never given her anything else, she just always point blank refuses to eat it if she doesn't like it.  It just makes teatime an unpleasant experience with me getting annoyed and her getting upset . Yet she loves vinegar, sucking lemons (!) and isn't keen on cake or chocolate biscuits!   The girl has very weird tastebuds - she lives off all sorts of fruit, a few different kinds of veg, cheese and hot dogs !

JT - not heard of the pint of milk thing!

25/06/2013 at 22:21

JG - I know how hard it is but I think you just need to take the pressure off and if she doesn't eat, so be it. Getting upset / annoyed isn't ultimately going to make her eat it. I make sure E has one meal a day which she will eat - which is often hot dogs or beans on toast or something like that, usually with extra veg (her ideal meal is hot dogs with cauliflower, broccoli and carrots?!). the other meal is then whatever we are going to have - which she does or doesn't eat. no alternatives offered. no pudding. I usually include something on the plate which I know she will eat, and put very little of the thing which will be rejected on there. I also segregate food - so pasta on one side, veg in middle, sauce on the other side, so she can just pick what she will eat (actually she will eat pasta, veg and sauce usually - but that's just an example). they won't starve!

J is currently obsessed with squid. and Chinese and (mild) Indian food. He loves tinned mackerel; loves anchovies. This is the boy who won't eat potatoes in any form - not even chips!

I indulge their passions fairly regularly - make sure we have lots of stir frys as they both love it. But I do give them other stuff too - because if you don't give it to them, they will NEVER eat it.

J eats lettuce now. And coleslaw. And that is just because he refuses to eat potatoes at school so ends up having to eat the salad that comes with many of the meals.

25/06/2013 at 22:21

Boak to the pint of milk JT!  Never been a fan of the stuff.  They didn't say anything about vitamin d when I was pregnant.

JG, am sure the food thing will get better, we have some good days here.  I can guarantee they will eat fish fingers and chips and would happily live off chicken nuggets, but pasta with bolognaise, pesto, ham and peas generally gets eaten.  Cottage pie can go down well. Roast dinner.  They are getting better with veg and I think having school lunches has helped as they just have to eat it if they are hungry!

CM mine are going through a violent stage, lots of pushing and hitting going on, so they end up having to apologise to each other a lot!

25/06/2013 at 22:23

oh and E isn't keen on cake really. she likes the icing but not the cake. and she doesn't eat chocolate biscuits although she always wants them.

she also loves salty things - marmite is a favourite. and salt and vinegar crisps. sounds like Sophie and E have some similarities there!

25/06/2013 at 22:23

Good grief JT, aren't we supposed to be avoiding the full fat stuff??  Surely a good old multi vit would do the same?  Just make sure it doesn't have vit A in it, or buy a special preggie one.

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