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How do you get going again after pregnancy?

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08/11/2012 at 13:46

Woo hoo EF. Still got everything crossed for once they are fertilized are they put back in? How many do they put back in, just one or do they take the chance and put 2 in, and if all good you get twins? Apologies for my ignorance  

I can second the microscooter. Leila got hers just before she was 2 and now scoots everywhere. We got her a folding metal 2 wheeler one in Australia so we could pack it away and she has just started using that again too. But she is much more proficient on the micro one. The 2 Mums that import the scooters must be laughing, everyone seems to have them. Apparently you can't get them in the states so maybe a venture for TT!?

Camlo, you do make me laugh re: pregnancy symptoms. Made me laugh out loud.

Child benefit, I think we will have ours removed, as hubby is above threshold. When does it stop? It is annoying that the more that you earn, the less you use (ie...higher earners are more likely to have private med etc) and the less you receive. But I still think the NHS is pretty amazing and it is usually the people on benefits and the dole that complain about them. Sorry to generalise....

I guess if you stopped the smokers benefits and they gave up smoking, taxes would have to rise elsewhere to cover the tax on the cigarettes?? And no guesses who would pay for it.

If you think shopping here is bad, Australia is 10 x worse. Considering they are supposedly a big beer drinking nation, a crate of 24 beers is over $40 which is about £32!! Milk and bread are also in excess of $3. I wouldn't live there, and don't understand people who bang on about a more affordable life style either!!!

Anyway...if youre still here...

Just been out for a nice 4.5 mile plod in the sunshine in shorts and vest. A nice feel good run, even if my fastest mile was 8.45!! The rest were 9.30's. I am def making the most of it as know I might have to stop anytime soon.

I picked up a load of second hand barbies this morning from the local buy and sell site on facebook. I am now overrun with over 25 of them (!!) but will have a very excited little girl when she gets home from pre-school. I think it will be a barbie house for Christmas, from us and grandparents as she is so into playing with her dolls and she has inherited wrestlers from her cousin too so the barbies and wrestlers often play together

08/11/2012 at 13:47

Lol at the putting names on the willies... if only there were one parent daft enough to take it literally!!

08/11/2012 at 15:10
Ang the annoying thing with the child benefit is you will still get it, but then have to fill in a self assessment tax form so the govt can ask for it back! Mad.m how much you get to keep depends on how much over 50k hubby earns, and if he earns over 60 you keep none.

We took our scooter to the states with us! Agree about Oz and shopping. We had former uk friends staying and the guy went to tescos to buy himself some affordable work trousers! Also there is no Amazon......(shudders at the thought!)
08/11/2012 at 16:36
I did read somewhere that if you're going to lose the whole lot then you could just tell the Child Benefit agency you don't want to claim it anymore and that way you won't have to fill in any forms or have it taken back in tax. Also remember that this is all based on your taxable pay so if you get bonuses that push you over ??60k in a year then you loose the whole thing for that yr. My combined car allowance and salary are just over ??60k but because my pension is deducted at source my taxable take home pay is less than ??60k so I get to keep some of it. God I'm so boring ... Can you tell I'm an accountant?

I'll go one further Caro, I think if you smoke during your pregnancy you shouldn't be allowed to keep the child! Seriously though, I'm amazed by the amount of women who still insist on poisoning not just themselves but their unborn children too when everybody knows the risks and dangers. My mum's excuse for smoking when preg with me has always been that they didn't know it was bad for baby back in the 70s... Hmmm?

EF - will be thinking of you tomorrow, hope it all goes okay.

Em - we went with the like it or lump it approach with our youngest. Our buggy broke around the time she turned 2 and we didn't want to spend money on a new one when we knew it would only get used for a yr at the most. So Anna has been walking the school run twice a day every day since then. I totted it up the other day and if you include the trips to toy library and the shops on to of the school run she probably walks around 13 miles a week. Not bad considering she's not 3 until end of January. I can't claim credit for getting her to walk though that's all down to my stay-at-home-husband who has the patience of a saint and doesn't mind if her dawdling home from school means it takes 35 minutes to do a 10 minute walk!

Yay, nearly home time and I'm off tomorrow as it's hubbies birthday! Right, must do some work before I go ...
08/11/2012 at 17:51

Anj i get to choose if i put back one or two.  I'm entitled to two because i am 38 but tbh i am not sure i would cope with twins, esp not financially, and if you do fall preg there is 25% chance it would be twins.  I am going to take advice from the embryologist and if they say we have poor embryos then i will put two back to max our chances but if good i will prob just do one. 

Lou is stuffed with the cold just now but as she seems well otherwise so I'm afraid it is school tomorrow as usual.  poor lamb but we just can't handle her being off tomorrow.  It is reminiscent of her chickenpox back last year when things went wrong last time! She plainly does not want a sibling!

08/11/2012 at 17:51

lol at willies!

08/11/2012 at 17:56

skimread only as have been off-line for 4 days with internet probs.

Loving the ranting - I'm there too, we lose all of ours as we were foolish enough to realise that me going back to work would gain nothing financially (we'd have been out of pocket after childcare), and even though it does my head in at times, I don't regret staying at home during these early years to keep the ship sailing (with hubby always being away it would have been a hideous nightmare any other way tbh). Neither of us have EVER claimed any other benefit, and yes, that money will be missed. No question. I guess for me, it more about HOW they've decided to do it really - why my friends down South who both earn wages that come in just under the threshold each should get to keep their child-benefit (ultimately they bring in more than us) while we get to loose ours just stinks. If they picked a number as a threshold, regardless of who earnt the money, then I could live with that I reckon....

Anyway, back later after proper read.

Amanda, my hubby has basically worked away from home for almost three years now, returning at weekends (usually in a vile mood!). After the first six months of it we moved up to Scotland to be with him, but the job went when the airbase he was working at closed so since then he's worked in three other locations (in England - we are in NE Scotland now) ... Agreed, a couple of nights a week is actually nice (it used to be like that) but week in week out with no sign of change is far from nice. Hey Ho. I've found hidden strengths as well as some very loose wires on this journey

Right, off now to sort kids

Edited: 08/11/2012 at 17:57
08/11/2012 at 18:19
Go for two know you want to

Karen I think you still need to claim it and then give it all back if you want hubby as a stay at home dad to get his mat insurance contributions paid I think.....or something like that.
08/11/2012 at 18:35

it sounds too bloody complicated to have to fill all that out to prove you are not entitled! i know we are not. is like tax credits.  i didnt fill the form in cos i knew we werent due anything and they practically threatened me with the jail unless i did the form! 


kindle has no automated punctuation, sorry! 

and no caro i def do not want 2!

08/11/2012 at 18:37
Yes you do EF. We will help. Really we will. (Not). We will name one of them at least
08/11/2012 at 18:46

So when does the paperwork need to be filled in? I still get the £80 per month, but thought it would automatically stop sometime soon. Hubby earns over 60k, I am a stay at home Mum so earn nothing... what are Mat insurance Contributions?

I agree, they should definitely do a household wage rather than one persons wage.

Ooh yes... do 2 EF!! When do you have to decide?

Karen, when I was pregnant with L, I went to look at a hospital maternity ward in Wexham Park Hospital and was absolutely amazed to see women about to drop smoking outside the entrance. Amazing, I am a bit ashamed if I have a glass of wine in a restaurant once in a blue moon with dinner, and try to hide it!!

Feel absolutely whacked now. I had my friends boy after pre school today so made cakes, then dinner and just sitting down now...having not made dinner for hubby and I yet. And I have a tonne of Biology to do this evening on areas of the brain and how they affect behaviour. Yawn!!

08/11/2012 at 18:50

ok here's a confession, if i cld guarantee twin girls or one of each i wld but i dont think i cld do twin boys.  i used to share a flat with twin lads and even their mum said to me, a word of advice, NEVER have twin boys if you can help it (sorry lotte! but you do have girls to offset!).  i'm also too much of a girl, just wld not know what to do with boys! 

I'm so guaranteeing twin boys and a cell split from just the one arent I?! and imsgine if that happened and i had put two in - triplets!!!!

08/11/2012 at 19:57

HAHAHAHA CM you crack me up - "we will help"!!!! Good luck though EF - will be thinking of you!

Interesting comments about the cost of living in Auz Anj - it's pretty high here too compared to the crap salaries! Luckily where we live the cost of living (excluding shopping) is pretty cheap - house prices, power etc. But yes the shopping is pretty woeful - lack of selection! Luckily I am even less into shopping since having Matilda than I was before.

I remember thinking the way they are setting the cap on incomes is ridiculous when it was first mentioned in the UK. Seems really unfair that they don't look at household income, Next month we will have been here for 12 months and will be entitled to a subsidy from our childcare which will be great! It was very frustrating earlier in the year when I was looking for work and we really struggled financially that we weren't entitled to anything as we'd not been here for 12 months. Both hubby and I are on lower wages than we were in the UK but trying to save to build back up a little bit in the bank.

Thanks for the walking advice. She is still very young so am not going to worry but it was just strange as she was so keen and then went completely off it. Seems to be better in the last few days though. New challenge is that she has become very possessive and grabby with things and has pushed other kids a few times that I have seen. Started when my sis came to stay with her 6 month old this week and she was snatching anything she had off her. Lots of deep breaths needing to be taken!! My friends 1 year old has just started daycare with Matilda and he loves her and normally she likes him but she has done it to him a few times too - he looks devastated!! Hoping this one is a shortlived phase!!!!

Right, best get some work done - will be skype meetings on the deck I think today as it's supposed to be a hot one.

08/11/2012 at 19:58

I'm not sure I could cope with twin GIRLS actually!!! Having had a boy first it's quite enlightening just how truly horrible small girls can be ... I guess the pettiness and bitching!!

But that aside, so very exciting - is it tomorrow?  but I can understand the qualms about having twins vs just one ... lets not even think about triplets

erm, what else ... ach, need to go back a couple of pages now ... back in a mo

08/11/2012 at 20:05

Em80, look forward to you joining us! When my daughter arrived my son was just turned 2.5, he wasn't a great walker but no way was I having a double buggy, so I went for the buggy board. Didn't use it all the time, on days when I really wanted him to walk I'd just forget to take it with me, but it did mean I got to walk to places and get daughter to nap in pram and not having a whining toddler all the time. I actually think I only used it for a few months and then we were fine anyway. Agree with others though that a scooter could work, and/or a balance bike. Didn't have one for son but daughter, aged 3, loved hers!

Three bottles of Bombay Saphire - OMG. Now I just LOVE that stuff, gin is what I usually drink if I need to try and stay kind of with it on an evening out, but no denying it still kills you afterwards!! LOL at hubby holding the bowl for you - now that has to be true love. I was expecting (like someone else said) for you to announce you then got up and did a 5am run (while still drunk or something!!). Great to hear you are going into action re the Across Shetland Run though - will be great and I am sure you will complete it in some awe-inspiring time.

Am enjoying hearing prep plans for the Tough Guy, but still no inclination to have a go ... strange the way my mind works, happy to make my way across natural obstacles that occur on a route (be it mud, hills, bog, snow, ice, sea etc - and I get a SERIOUS buzz out of that) but if it's a man-made obstacle course, especially the fire-burning stuff then, no thank you!!! That said, I was lucky enough to have a go at plenty of Army Assault courses as a teenage venture scout - growing up with Aldershot and Pirbright barracks on our doorstep, they were more than happy to put us through our paces and I did love all of that.

08/11/2012 at 20:10

Anj - those are still good paces to be running at, given your 'condition'; so go you

Almost Friday and I am glad ... have managed to 'teach' two pilates classes and do a shift at the library and survived the school discos - on Tues eve we had swim 4-4.30 then S's disco 5.45-6.45 and J's 7-8.30, thank goodness a wonderful friend drove right out of her way to drop J back otherwise S would have been evil.

Lotte - yes it's definitely bad with the dark evenings, as I drove back from Js guitar lesson in Nairn last night we were all feeling it I think, home at 6.30 and then tea, again S was getting pretty horrible.

RUNNING - that swear word again!!! Finally think the germs are lifting so I have done a 7-miler Mon, 3 Tues, 3.5 Weds and 10 today, hoping for a longer one tomorrow before nothing at the weekend.  Bouncing the word 'treadmill' around in my head again ... this is the first week in a month I've done some 'decentish' training and it sucks as I was really beginning to feel fit again!!

08/11/2012 at 20:36
08/11/2012 at 20:48

for £200 I'd expect them to run the course on their own!

08/11/2012 at 21:08

EF - i agree, i would soooo much rather have twin boys than twin girls. my boy is soooo lovely. he is sweet and thoughtful and so much easier to control than my girl! and it's not just age related. he is just such a poppet. not to say he doesn't have his moments, but truly he is an absolute doddle compared to his sister.

i think you would be fab with boys. they are much easier to fathom out and a WHOLE lot less contrary. and they love love love cuddles. J likes to have some part of himself in contact with me as much as he can. he sidles his foot against mine at the table, or leans on me if he is looking over my shoulder.

anyway - we need some more twins on the thread, as MM's are now 6 and Lotte's are 4. and we haven't had triplets, so it's definitely time for some more multiples.

i have just done 10.5k fartlek with the fast boys at club. no other girls ran with the group - so i was last. but i did it. VERY proud of myself tonight. looking forward to a large bowl of cereal for tea

08/11/2012 at 21:13

woo hoo CM, look at you speedy miss!

I agree with absolutely everything you've said about boys as your experiences pretty much mimic mine for both the boy and the girl!!  One of my closest friends down South actually has said, after seeing madam in action, that she really would rather have another boy if she had a chance (actually she's not having any more, anyway, but made me feel that at least I wasn't being a complete drama queen about my daughter!!). I DO absolutely adore her though, don't mistake me, but OMG, she brings out the worst in me too

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