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How do you get going again after pregnancy?

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04/03/2013 at 22:30

Hoggle - similar stuff then really - my hubby does not do talking feelings, also loathes job but cannot see how to leave company he's been at all his life!! We did go through a phase of him thinking about retraining for something but again, he finds change quite hard to get his head round, whereas I am of the 'we will make it work whatever' mentality.  This has dragged on for the last two years really and I've almost forgotten where we started in all this ... but yes, we all love it a lot up here ...

although J is having a really tough time at school with being generally picked on and excluded from playing at playtime so I need to go in and take task with teachers ... they are not especially receptive though and last time I was made to feel I was making a mountain out of a molehill!

Goodness, sorry, I am waffling on and on so I am definitely away to bed!!!

Edited: 04/03/2013 at 22:30
04/03/2013 at 22:33

Oh other funny coincidence - one of my friends Dr's is my mums cousins son. Pretty big coincidence considering Mum is English and he was born, raised and trained in the UK. And here he is nursing my friends baby in NZ!

05/03/2013 at 05:19

Seriously JT?!

Man today has been challenging! Normally I can juggle work and picking M up at 2 - I have to work like a demon until then but its ok. Today no chance!!! I was behind the ball all day - finding out I hadn't done things I should have etc etc - all flowing on from being off sick. To top it all of something crazy is happening with my iphone (work/personal) work has been sent some crazy bills saying I have used $1000 over my plan?!!! Freaked me out totally but doesn't make any sense. I use my phone for going on FB, here etc but not ridiculous amounts and almost always when phone is on wireless broadband not 3g. Still was pretty worried but the document sent back from the phone company shows data being used all through the night 2 am 3 am etc etc so clearly something going wrong. Work aren't blaming me or anything but I hate having this sort of thing happen to me!

Right, need to get off here (not on my phone!!!!)

05/03/2013 at 07:35
Tough day hoggle and grrr to the iPhone bill problem! At least you can definitely say it wasn't you! Brilliant news for your friends baby though (and it is certainly a small world sometimes!).
JT- I'm guessing he used to smoke? So has he been doing it sneakily. Always amazes me when people try and hide smoking as the smell of a smoker coming into a nonsmoking house is pretty obvious! Hope you and hubby can resolve it.
And also JT, if you want a place to stay about 25min train ride from Waterloo for your bike ride you are most welcome! Expect its too far but maybe as a backup?!
Was thinking we should do house swaps/house sittings on here, if anyone wants to stay at mine in the last two weeks of June whilst we're on holiday?! We're close to London/chessington/Thorpe park have to feed my cat of course

CC- tough for you too. You sound remarkably patient to me! Imagine if you acted the same as he is... If you had to move would it be back down south to your old house? Poor J at school too, definitely need to talk to them again.

Hi to JG. Boo to continued pain when running though.

I managed a 15ish miler on Sunday, but seriously nearly quitted more than once, due to dodgy tummy and various pains, my sore bum pain was back plus my ankle was hurting. Outside of ankle very painful now and was limping all yesterday! Very concerned now, have iced and rested but would like to run today. Typically this has occurred just as my schedule is halfway and getting to its heaviest mileage. Will try and run today but I am not optimistic
Definitely need the running to take my mind off all the stressing! The childminders last day will be 27th march so haven't got long to find childcare!
Thanks for advice re. nannies CM, I know it'll be an expensive option but with the two girls I'm pretty sure the local nursery will be more, at about ??75 per day so ??150 for both (no sibling discount for 3days/wk unfortunately). My childminder was ??110 a day for both which actually only works out as ??5.50 an hr, reasonable for my area. And even though nursery would be good for security of knowing they're not going to quit(!) it has big classes and I wanted Maggie to do preschool at what will be her infants school next yr not at the nursery. Anyway, I'm seeing a nanny who was recommended by a friend on Friday, I am scared of the mat leave thing (she doesn't have kids yet!) so I will have to think about that! No idea what to ask/expect from a nanny though. They do some housework too don't they? And I guess there's expenses, driving my car etc. lots to think about...
Have decided not to quit work yet though. Just a gut reaction to all the illnesses and my childminder leaving. As hubby pointed out, my boss has been incredibly understanding about all my time off and no suggestion I should've taken it as unpaid leave/holiday so it would be crazy to quit a job that is so child friendly, despite the lack of money!
Anyway, will stop waffling on, must get everyone ready!

Also need tips for presents for a 3yr old? Maggie is 3 in 2 weeks and I haven't been thinking much about it, especially as getting Rosie baptised the weekend before. Was looking at leapfrog stuff? We've had this discussion before I think but can't remember whether anyone thought they were worth it or not?!
05/03/2013 at 07:48
Dear God, wish childminders here got paid that. For 2 children from same family I'd get ??45 per day, ??30 for 1st child & ??15 for the 2nd.
05/03/2013 at 07:49
Think nursery about ??36 per day here
05/03/2013 at 08:08
Hi Sonya, hope you find a good child care solution. Wow, daycare is expensive in uk. We pay $208 a week for 5 days up to 12.5 hours a day for Max. Babies are a bit more expensive but I think we will get 2nd child discount. Still nearly $11,000pa for one child.

JT, grr to husband smoking again. Would be beside myself if Mr TT started again but then so would he. His comment about being likely to do it more if you got onto him about it (mine would have used the word 'nagged') is so familiar.

For the last 3 years, Mr TT has played golf between 1 and 3 times between Friday, Saturday and Sunday. I have never complained about him doing it even though it completely messes up our weekends. He has stopped playing on Saturdays so he can spend more time as a family. Last weekend Max was invited to play with his friend on Saturday morning which I took him along to and then I had a friend's baby shower on the Sunday. For the first time in ages, Mr TT didn't play golf on Sunday (too cold!) but had the cheek to moan at me for having arranged to do things both days of the weekend and apparently I had done the same the previous weekend! For starters one of the 'things' was for Max, not me. Also I generally arrange to do things when he is playing golf but when he then cancels he gets grumpy that I have plans. Big grr.

Os is a bit under the weather at moment. Has nasty rasping cough which sounds painful to him. Doc took a swab on Friday to test for rsv (not sure if it is called the same in uk?). Haven't got results yet. He seems a little better but really hope it's not serious.

Hoggle, amazing coincidence, small world!

Sorry so many of you suffering niggles at the moment. I guess it's inevitable while building up mileage for spring marathons. Hope no one ends up consigned to bench permanently. In theory I can start exercising in a week. Have tried 'jogging' to mailbox though and not a good feeling so will have to start slowly.
05/03/2013 at 08:13

Sat afternoon CM? Free all Sat from 10.30am. But yes Reading half Sunday taking up most of the day sadly....

No JT surely not?

Hope you get something positive from the docs CM

Very hard for you CC. But good he is willing to start to thinking about it. I would be venting for sure. My hubbie enjoyed his first day. So far they seem a much nicer positive bunch than his old company. We shall see though hey!

Another very hard lot for Sonya. Childcare for two is so expensive. I really struggled with the work decision after the twins were born and the £50 a month take home after childcare swung it for me. I decided I just didn't enjoy my job enough. Now rather keen to use my brain a bit more. No new designs on the horizon after a rather busy few months at the end of last year ...

05/03/2013 at 08:31
Oh yes, 3rd birthdays! Max is 3 on Friday and we have done nothing! No gift, no party planned.... Have been a little sidetracked with new baby and putting house back together after flood (floor back down yesterday, yay! Also holes in walls should be fixed today, just need painting and bathroom to be finished).

Really must do something for his birthday but think we might delay it a week....
05/03/2013 at 08:42
By the way, middle of the night feeds are far more bearable having you lot to chat to!
05/03/2013 at 09:11

Grr Ttid! I have had hubby say that occasionally - I got home early from work where were you guys?! Well I don't sit around the house all afternoon with a bored child in case you get home early!!

Gah - I am HATING work today! Ok tonight as it is 10pm and am working! Too many stresses and pressures all at once! It's the time of the year and will all resolve itself but I'm struggling to keep afloat and it's the first time I've thought it would be great for M to stay at daycare all day tomorrow. I'm sure by next week it will be back to being nice and simple again - I hope!!

05/03/2013 at 09:34

MM - yes maybe sat afternoon.  could get kids fish and chips to eat in car after J finishes art club at 1, and be with you just after 2. have a couple of hours with you and head over to my friend. will check with her and let you know. thanks!

05/03/2013 at 09:38

coincidence - just had an email from my friend, MM - think that plan may work!

05/03/2013 at 10:58
Poor J CC. hope the school support you. Boo to running niggles Sonya. Are u doing London then?

Congrats EF!

Boo to all the work/moving/irritating hubby dilemmas too. Life just seems to be one enormous decision after another sometimes. Hope you get the childcare sorted too Sonya.

I managed a day at work y'day and felt better than I expected too. But maybe I overdid it as got up this morning, ate my weetabix and then threw up 4 times. Thought it was never gonna stop. Thank goodness for my mum who's come to London to help me out today.

I should keep a notebook of all the birthday suggestions as I'm always stumped for pressies for anyone older than E ! Lovely lovely sunshine here today. Tempted to try a run but after this mornings puke fest I think my mum would kill me!

CC - what's the story with your move north and your hubby's job? I guess it all happened before I joined the thread. Are you guys Scottish? What does your hubby do?
05/03/2013 at 11:54

blimey, brookie. you have got bad sickness. i just felt sick for most of my pregnancy with J. would heave non-stop. but wasn't ever sick. much less sicky on E. think i had it easy! remember going running when pregnant with J and heaving loudly. ran past a field heaving and all the cows started moo-ing back. then one day was running down a lane heaving loudly and a bloke stuck his head of his shed and looked very alarmed!!

05/03/2013 at 11:56

Sonya - have you tried massage as well as the ice?  I'm guessing tendons up side of ankle to knee could be tight (peroneal etc).  I have been rollering my calf and really digging in with thumbs etc all round that area and it's amazing what gets tight.

Boo to the juggling Hoggle, am sure it will settle down but not fun in the meantime!

Grrrrr TTid - I'd be annoyed at that, but then it sounds similar.  The two ladies I had for Pilates were having a good old hubby-rant this morning too ... must be something in the air!!

Brookie - boo to the morning vom, I hope this phase passes quickly for you!!

We are all English and have a house down in NW Surrey (which my sister is renting from us). We moved up here in 2010, hubby took a job within his company (large well-known defence company that supply planes, aircraft carriers etc) to run a big project at the air base up here ... was an exciting opportunity but also his current project was at end of life. Anyway, defence review of 2010 closed the base and scrapped the plane ... so he's had to find other roles within the company since then (nothing up here though).  His job has been uncertain at times, he doesn't know what else he'd like to do (hates current job) and in the meantime we fell in love with it up here. I've been reluctant to move as I love it and also not dragging the kids around various schools and locations with changing jobs ... But he commutes South (currently in Lincoln) on a Sun eve/Mon morning and livesi in a hotel all week, comes home Thurs or Fri eve every week ... so is a bit of an ongoing challenge which has been dragging on somewhat ... and the long-suffering lovelies on here have listened to endless rants and meltdowns from me in the meantime!!!  That god he's finally reached the point of actually doing something about it all.  If he stays with company then realistically it will probably be Lancashire .. so lots of the great outdoors etc, still pretty rural but it's not here , but we do all need to be together most of the time really.

How about a power-walk rather than a run - I used to find with my pregancy for S that some form of exercise used to buy me a little bit of nausea-free time.

Right - off to try 8 miles on the treadmill with 3 at half-marathon pace ... ha ha, if only I knew what that was ... haven't run one since 2008!!!! eeek

Edited: 05/03/2013 at 11:58
05/03/2013 at 12:12
Oh Brookie I remember it well, had to drive myself to hospital one night as was so sick I tore my oesophagus + was throwing up blood. It did pass tho, school run was a nightmare as I could smell dog poo at 50ft away + gagged the whole time. Never again!
05/03/2013 at 13:02

Oh brookie I was just like that with both pregnancies. So much worse with S. I should have been hospitalised with her as was being sick 15-20 times a day!! But they gave me anti-emetics instead which slowed down the sickness and it eased off a bit by 16 weeks but was still sick once or twice a day until 20 weeks. Hope its not that bad for you ...

Fab news CM. Tea and cake then!!


05/03/2013 at 13:37

Must be something in the air indeed. I had a right go at my hubby yesterday morning. Think I am a bit PMT but it doesn't help when he points that out mid argument. Sometimes it just really gets to me how little he does around the house. But when I bring it up  I get told that he lets me do all my running and makes the twins breakfast most morning so I should b e thankful. Yes he does look after his kids on the occasions when I run when they are not all in bed but only in a good time Dad kind of way and I return to chaos and mess to deal with. The man has never cleaned a toilet, used a hoover or an iron but because he can load the dishwasher occasionally he is a modern man He is out 4 nights a week at the moment and all Sat morning which is fair enough but when he turns around a bitches at me for not getting something done, implying its because I've been running or on FB then Ido get pissed off! Or at 10pm when I am halfway through a basket of everyone elses ironing and he is lounging on the sofa and says why are you so grumpy tonight and wonders why I want to smack him one! Haha PMT indeed, sorry for the rant.

Onywye... CC you have been living in limbo for so long and you cope with it amazingly well. How was the dreadmill?

Poor Brookie, morning sickness is just the worst (())

Hoggle, great news about friends son. Hope this busy period eases soon, sounds stressful.

Hope you find childcare solution quickly Sonya. Nearly fell over at the childcare cost, holey moley! Its funny how we are all so different. I could quite happily not work at all and be a kept woman! Joking aside my brain is too full of everything else with running the house, the 6 kids and the various clubs etc we are involved in, not to mention my running. I don't have time to work! But unfortunately we need the money and I will have to try and earn more when the twins start school after the summer. After hubby had his midlife crisis and changed jobs our combined salary is less than his old salary was. I hate struggling to make ends meet every month, we have always been the spend every penny every month kind of people but havem't actually had to stress about whether we can afford to feed the kids before now. But we are happy (except when I have PMT) so have to be thankful for that.

I love music. Never have the radio off. Radio 1 or our local station usually so pretty upto date with new stuff. Kids are well into music too. Sophie has just discovered my Bob Marley CD so loving hearing him blasting from her room, just hope she hasn't got any wacky backy in there too

05/03/2013 at 13:44

Legs seem to have lived up after a rest day yesterday (well I only did 1 run 6 easy miles).

Out at 6am this morning for 10 miles then did my second run at 10am. Can't get to the track session tomorrow and it is a lovely day today so did a spur of the moment speed session, 2 miles w/u then 2m tempo (av 6.00mm), 1m easy, 2m tempo (av 6.11mm), 1m cool down. That'll do!

My parents have been in Tasmania for the last 6 weeks and should be back on thursday, they usually babysit on track nights so looking forward to having them back!

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