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How do you get going again after pregnancy?

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Camlo    pirate
13/01/2015 at 08:01

Hi PG - if me kids are sick my boss usually tells me to work from home or take toil, thankfully it doesnt happen often. I remember paying huge nursery bills and nearly jumped for joy when archie started school! Hope you get house sorted!!!!!! 


13/01/2015 at 09:57

nannies are expensive that's for sure. don't forget your employer's tax and NIC too...

at the university, we have emergency dependents' leave, so we can have a day off with our kids paid if they are sick. I don't know how many a year you can have before they start getting 4rsey about it though. I haven't had one yet as I've tended to work from home if they are ill. mine are old enough now that I can work from home if they're sick. doesn't work if you've got a baby or toddler though!

nightmare commutes, most of salary going in childcare bills - yup, been there. fortunately my childcare bill isn't too bad now as I just use a childminder for wrap around and my holiday allowance is generous so I don't need much childcare during the holidays. but when you have 2 (or more!)  in full-time childcare, that's painful!

13/01/2015 at 12:51
I was about to go for a run this morning and then it pissed down with rain so I waited a bit, then it rained again so I waited a bit more. Now I'm thinking I just need to pull myself together and get out the door cos I'm being a great big wuss - right?! This is my only chance to run this week because of work, so I'm definitely going to go...when it's stopped raining!

Where is CC?! I want to hear about the epic race!!

My commute in to work was awful yesterday but ok at home time - which is probably the only advantage to working a really long day and leaving at 8.30 in the evening. It was also great during the Christmas holiday, which again is the only positive thing about being at work when everyone else is off!!
Edited: 13/01/2015 at 12:55
13/01/2015 at 14:45

man - I've had a gutsfull of people!!!!! my deputy (grumpy sod) has been off for a few days and it's been nice. got loads done. no hassle. he's back today. face like thunder, not talking to me - because I had the audacity to email him while he was off asking him if he'd had chance to look at a request which had come in from director on 13 December - exactly a month ago. I know he was off from 19 dec through till new year and then again for 3 days last week / this week. BUT a holding message - i'm off, I'm not ignoring you, i'll pick it up on my return - would have helped! I had no idea if he'd registered it / ignored it (which he tends to do with stuff he doesn't agree with).

and my team have just had a huge hissy fit at some improvement stuff I have suggested

and i'm sick of people and their stupid foibles; crying on me, cold shouldering me, generally having fits when I ask them to do things.

GAH. I should not have such a massive team reporting directly to me, should I???

13/01/2015 at 20:21

Great, I write a big post about how fed up I am and it bombs on me.

No CM, it is just stupid.  Especially when there are so many idiots.

I am fed up, I hate my job, i miss my kids, i dont make that much after childcare but still enough so that I have to work.  I am pinning my hopes on being made redundant.  The new management are bringing all their mates in so i am hoping they will then start to get rid of all of us oldies.  The payout could last me for years.  Oh and we still haven't exchanged. FFS.

Anyone got anything nice to share?

13/01/2015 at 20:33

Oh PG that is tough!!! The only thing that makes me ok about going back to work is the fact that I really enjoy my job, financially its necessary but would be much harder if I was unhappy.

CM - I can picture the type of idiots that report to you as have worked with many in the past (years of public sector work and there are people there who would never get away with their appalling behaviour in the private sector. Hugs to you - I also think you may need a hug to help with the arrival of the trombone - eeek!!

All ok here - Freya is on the verge of smiling which is lovely. Hubby came home yesterday and told me the company he works for has been sold. They are being made redundant and the supposedly re-employed the next day. Their reassurances aren't very reassuring when you are as financially vulnerable as we are at the moment. Have decided not to worry as there is nothing I can do to change it.

On a positive note - had a lovely long walk along the coastal path with a friend yesterday. Both our bigger girls were not there so was very peaceful!!! I live in such a beautiful place.


13/01/2015 at 20:34

Huge hugs PG I really hope something works out for you soon. Not a good place to be My sort of nice but I probably shouldn't find it nice news is that Ben is looking for another job. He is desperately unhappy. The being directed back to work in Coventry has come with a change in role that he detests. He thinks they are trying to manage him out. So he's looking at moving back into a university position as head of international or something similar. Nottingham are looking ATM. That would be OK. And things are improving all the time.

Had a good run today too, even if it was freezing! Have to say though, every time I felt cold, I told myself to stop being a wuss and get on with it because it wasn't the Spine!! CC, hope you're still resting on a Mars Bar drip  Can't wait to hear.

Gah, CM - guess the answer to having so many people to manage is a resounding no! 


13/01/2015 at 20:36

Cross posts, Hoggle, that sounds very worrying Hope tomorrow brings the news you hope for x

13/01/2015 at 21:17

Hugs PG, I felt the same when I went back to teaching after I had Sophie, although I did enjoy a bit of "me" time - not much though in a secondary school!  I decided to leave as life's too short to be unhappy at work, but that's easier said than done.  Hope you can work something out.

Hoggle - fingers crossed it is as straightforward as they say!

Nuro - glad things are on the up 

Another storm heading for us tomorrow - can just see the back half of the field being retired if they haven't made it far enough when it hits.

Camlo    pirate
14/01/2015 at 22:11

Hope CC has a safe journey home and knows how proud we are of her. 

Did an hour turbo session with a quick 5 min run in the freezing rain straight after brrrr.  MIL called earlier to say she had provisionally booked me on a weekend running meditation course but it clashed with my half iron so i had to turn it down. i was soooo touched that she would do that for me. She said that since my nan had died and my mum had proved herself to be useless she wanted me to know that she loved me.... 

Hoggle - If you get made redundant do you still get redundancy pay if you are promised to be taken on again (by someone else) the next day? 

hope you are ok CM - saw that you were giving your keys a wash in the machine.... 

14/01/2015 at 22:26

What a lovely MIL Camlo.  I am glad someone is doing something nice for you after all the stuff with your mum.

Had a pretty miserable day today.  Work is generally miserable and my stress levels almost hit the roof when i got an email from my solicitor saying that he couldnt release the request for funds as he was missing my marriage certificate.  I have already sent it and he has had since Sept to ask for this.  I have continually asked what is outstanding.  Today was the first mention of it.  Luckily i was working at home so i could send it over.  FFS.  Sick baby.  Not sure he'll make it through nursery tomorrow. Hubby has said he can come home if needed. I am so scared of telling my boss my kids are sick.  My poor team mates little girl just came down with chicken pox.  My reaction when she told me was 'shit'.  My friend just told me that her husband has been working with banks as they are generally trying to encourage working mothers. Not mine!

Nurofen - glad things are improving.  Keep on with it.

Hoggle - hope you are keeping zen and staying positive.

15/01/2015 at 07:40
Aw Camlo that is lovely, what a wonderful MiL
15/01/2015 at 09:43
PG3 - that sounds really stressful. Juggling work and childcare has to come high up the leaderboard of 'things that keep me awake at night'! Part of the reason I chose to work where I do is because all my colleagues with children also have partners who work, so we all have crises at various points, and cover for each other. Although the thought of my small ones having chicken pox consecutively and having to re-jig both our work rotas was part of the reason I got them vaccinated!! I hope it all works out ok.

Camlo - your mil sounds a gem!

Hoggle - hope you've got good news on the job front. Love the baby pics, makes me feel quite broody!
15/01/2015 at 10:12

aw that's lovely of your MIL.

PG3 - I get how you feel. i don't like working; don't mind my job but the people - omg the people... anyway, if you feel redundancy is likely, then hang on in there. but to be honest, at some point you have to take a stand for your sanity. the place i was working before was making me so anxious - i don't feel anxious in this place. usually just angry and frazzled

nearly got hit by a car on my run last night. was crossing the road on the one way system. there was a car in the layby next to the fish n chip shop with his lights on. i clocked him but he wasn't moving and wasn't indicating or anything, so i started to run across the road, at which point he pulled out, without indicating - or obviously looking ahead of him (1 way, so i guess he looked behind but not in front so didn't see me). i ended up diving onto his bonnet - and i gave him a 2 finger salute...

it was the evening for 2 finger salutes. i also engaged in a shouting match with an extremely arrogant Jag driver ( i know they aren't all arrogant, Nurofen ). This one was just parking across the exit from the car park i use when i walked back to my car. he was taking his time reversing across the exit because the space was so small. as he got out of the car i asked him if he was leaving his car there as he was blocking the exit to the car park completely. he said 'frankly i don't give a sh1t'. i said 'pardon? you're blocking the exit. are you going to be long?' he said 'didn't you hear. i don't give a shit. i'll be longer now though'.

he was going into the nursery next to the car park to pick up his son. fair enough - i understand the stress and it was just before 6pm. if he'd said 'i'm really sorry i'm blocking you in. i'll be 2 ticks' - that would have been different. anyway, as he got back to his car with his son, he glared at me, then stuck two fingers up at me. so i shouted out of my window 'great to see you are setting such a good example to your young child by deliberately breaking the law'. then i got a one finger salute.

oh lordy. then i washed my car keys last night too. what a Muppet.

15/01/2015 at 18:11

Good lord CM. What an unpleasant twonk of a man. 

15/01/2015 at 20:50

How's little one today, PG? Better I hope. What a useless solicitor you have there Not what you need right now! 

Camlo - that's truly lovely I do like the sound of that course though - maybe that's something a few of us could do together at some point instead of a race

LOL CM! I mean, what a twonk but yes, I know another Jag driver who is occasionally a tad arrogant...

Finally got a date through for my scan, hooray. It's a week on Saturday. Hoping there'll be nothing to see but it will be nice to have the reassurance. I'm still spotting all the time which is a right pain, and I am like a zitty teenager! Could possibly be explained by stress I suppose. Hmmph. 

Have had a really nice week this week Lots of meeting up with friends and getting out and about. Went to a new baby group today with some people I used to work with, which was fun. We already do one on Mondays, but this one is a bit busier. G seemed to enjoy it, which is the main thing. It's down the road from school and finishes just before home time, so it's convenient too. Also went to see a new counsellor - she focuses on relationships. She's fab! Looking forward to working with her - have got six sessions on my own and then we are going to start couples' therapy. 

Right, early night for me as I am shattered! G was up at 5.30 today and hasn't slept much so I need my bed 

16/01/2015 at 11:52

Had a crazy run this morning, splits over 5 miles were a minute quicker than last week.  How does that work??  Last week 9.35 ave mile, this week 8.41.  Very happy obviously!!!!  Hopefully there will be more 8's at the front of my miles for the rest of the year.....

16/01/2015 at 19:46

What an absolute loser CM! 

Yay to a good week Nurofen and starting counselling.

Kinsey - woo hoo!  Did you have your Weetabix this morning? 

Well my sister rang on Wednesday night and was very apologetic and ashamed, so we had a long chat where I gave some honest truths (and she agreed or didn't realise she was like that) so hopefully we can move on.  A little relieved, I have to say.

Ooh Chinese is here, back later 

Camlo    pirate
17/01/2015 at 21:11

Hope chinese was nice JG - glad sis saw some sense. 

CM - hang in there . Not your best week is it? 

Nurofen - glad counsellor was good, still like the idea of a meet up with or without running! 

Kinsey - legs are stronger! Well either that or the wind was blowing in your face last week? 

PG - how are things in your house now? 

CC - hope you are recovering and getting warm through. 


17/01/2015 at 21:24

Maybe the two plus weeks off booze?  Its a mystery!  Will probably be slow again tomorrow!

JG - glad you had a more normal conversation with your sister, hope you can build on it.


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