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How do you get going again after pregnancy?

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07/08/2007 at 11:18
EF - your pics are so lovely and special - Louise is indeed gorgeous - thx for sharing them with us.
07/08/2007 at 14:09
Thanks all for the info. GM you're right - I think I did answer my own question about who to see! Spoke to the HV re the GP and she nearly had a fit!!! She's told me which GPs to go and see in future, unsurprisingly Dr K was not one of them!!!

Mitts - hope you're ok to wear your suit, it does sound like a fab wedding and hen night. Must be nice to the opportunity to get dressed up and not be a Mummy for the day (as much as I love it I'm sure I'll get to wanting to the Jane again and not Ted's Mum for a day!).

We've had a frantic few days as Ted has had a growth spurt, Jon and I are pretty shattered as he has been feeding regularly through the night, last night I had to resort to a bottle earlier than usual as my milk supply dried up! Consequently Ted has gained 10oz in seven days so I think that could explain everything... Generally he's a little star and doesn't cry so I knew something was up, just very glad that that was the problem.

We went to register Ted today and I managed to veto the family name as I've taught a couple of boys with that name that have made my hair stand on end! Thought hubby would be really disappointed when I said I didn't want to use it (did help that the ancient family name only turned out to go back two generations not the 22 that we'd been told!) so he's been registered as Edward William, not sure if hubby might change his mind within the first year, but may have to go with the flow if he does!
07/08/2007 at 18:28
EF - gorgeous photos- congrats

JT glad all is sorted with the feeding.
08/08/2007 at 21:32
Oh my god Janie - just a real quickie from me - Edward William is my husband and so was my Taid!! Rest assured, they are good strong dependable men :)
08/08/2007 at 22:29
Thanks AP that's good to hear! Ted's got a fair amount of Welsh blood in him so hopefully he'll be a good Taid too one day!
10/08/2007 at 18:04
Hello all

Feeling rested here after managing a day-time nap for once! I have a feeling little Hector is going through his six week growth spurt: last night was a long one, with him feeding every hour and then just staying wide awake! Blimey, it would have been harder if he hadn't been smiling and giggling at me ;)

We made it to our post-natal mums and babies yoga class yesterday. It's a lovely chilled class and you can happily feed there and wander around if your baby starts crying. Hector was fine though and no screaming fits...he did, however, throw up all over me, himself and the yoga mat, how embarrassing!

Talking of feeding in public (breastfeeding), I think it was EF who mentioned rushing back home from the park to feed. We have now mastered the art of emergency feeding...wherever that might be! So far we've 'refuelled' on the bus, on the train, at Sainsburys checkout, in a display at Ikea, in the park. It's a case of having to, otherwise he'll eat his hand right off! Feeling quite proud of myself for this as I was very nervous and embarrassed about it all at first - I'd recommend it, it's liberating!

Have a great weekend everyone, the weather is scorching here.

A+h xx
10/08/2007 at 21:13
I am with you with the feeding AP - found myself at a service station on the M25 on sat with both my baps out feeding 2 at once cos they just couldnt wait for me to do 1 at a time (I was sat on the grass though, dont think I could do 2 at once inside!) - its as if my breasts are purely their to nourish the babies so I just dont feel embarrassed. Wierd!

GP sent me an appointment for my 6 week check - I have recovered really well and although I am still on meds for my BP and iron levels I am hoping I can start some gentle exercise next week. Apparently a laisure centre nearby has a spinning class that you can take babies in car seats to and I want to do a pilates class as my stomach is horrendous. not sure i feel ready to run yet but I am sure i will get there.
11/08/2007 at 10:33
I've been lucky so far not had to do a public feed - did end up in the car when we went for a bar meal the other lunchtime as I felt a bit too on display in the pub! Poor child, being dragged to the pub already!!!

I'm going to speak to the HV this week re exercise, feel it might be the best thing to do, I can then suss out whether she thinks I should see the GP or not.

Had a really tough week this week. Outlaws were down and they were to frank horrendous. They were so bad that hubby had to take Friday off work to be with me as he felt it was unfair for me to have to put up with the situation any longer. They took the hint and left early thankfully, couldn't have put up with that any longer. They were doing things like waiting for me to go upstairs at lunchtime to feed Ted and having their lunch and then tell me I had to sort myself out because I'd missed it... On Thursday night they stopped speaking to us and created a terrible atmosphere which fed through to Ted. Hubby has said that they are never going to stay again for longer than a night as they were so interfering with Ted. I'm just grateful he was able to see what they were like as it could have been so much more difficult. Anyway they're gone now - onward and upward and hopefully a more settled baby again!
11/08/2007 at 21:55
Sounds dreadful Janie... glad they are gone. Its amazing how babies pick up on tension etc, i am sure the girls are cranky when i am feeling anxious and out of sorts. Hopefully they have gone home and realised the error of their ways.

I have had mum staying (or been in london at hers) mon - fri for the last 2 weeks. She has been great and manged not to interfere yet but I must admit i am glad she has gone now so i can get into my own routine and back to some sort of normality. Part of me is a little scared to be going it alone though, although I have done several days solo and they have been fine.

Think we may be having the 6 week growth spurt a week early - non stop feeding all night and day and 2 babies who got so overtired today they looked like they would never sleep again! thankfully asleep now!

A question for those with older babies (or new ones!), where do your babies sleep? Ours have been in our room in a pram until now but invariably end up in our bed as I feed them there and usually we all fall asleep mid feed. Most nights they settle back in thier pram happily but others will only settle in our bed, sometimes only when lying on us! not sure what to do for the best, last night we put them in a cot in thier room and they slept there til 2 but then didnt settle until 5 so ended up in bed with us cos i was just so tired. Not sure wether to go with the flow and bed share or persevere and only feed/ put them down in thier own room to prevent bad habits. Any ideas welcome!
11/08/2007 at 22:21
Hetty we're going through the same type of sleeping dilema. Ted will frequently only go to sleep when nursed, usually by me. Really worried that I may be making a rod for my own back by not getting him into the habit of settling down himself or is it just the age of the baby?

It certainly sounds like your two are going through a growth spurt. Ted did the same to me last week, 48 hours of what felt like constant feeding! The midwife was very reassuring that it was a growth spurt, apparently they can occur every three to four weeks.

Inlaws have been very quiet today. Don't think they'll apologise, they don't see it as their fault. Brother-i-l rang hubby and asked how on earth he'd put up with them for so long anyway?!!!!! I was so lucky the week before as my mum had been down and had been so fantastically supportive and helpful. Think that made it even more difficult!

12/08/2007 at 11:10
Janie - poor you! I can sympathise - we had husband's parents last week Sun/Mon then my mum and sister Tues/wed. It was just too much! People don't say anything directly, but I get little hints and looks that suggest they don't agree with certain things we do. Husband keeps saying I shouldn't worry what anyone thinks, but it's hard not to feel hurt. And I do wish his mum would indulge us a bit and let us enjoy these moments as if they've never happened to anyone else before (do you know what I mean?) instead of always saying 'Oh, yes, our kids did that...blah, blah'.

I'll shut up now!

Hetty - it does sound like a growth spurt, we're going through exactly the same thing at the moment - it was every hour last night, then one feed after just half an hour! I'm knackered!

Regarding the sleeping arrangements. I would say do what feels right for you and your baby/ies. We are taking our lead from Hector and going with the flow. I really don't believe in the 'creating a rod for your own back' thing. I read a great book, which might help:

The Continuum Concept by Jean Liedloff

She has studied the way children are brought up in different cultures and it's only here in the west that we insist on putting our babies to sleep in another room, something like 90% of the world's population co-sleeps!!

Anyway, that's just my opinion and it's all individual, we all have different needs and beliefs.

Hetty - I do think about you a lot and marvel at how much harder it must be with two, you're doing brilliantly :)
12/08/2007 at 15:25
Hello ladies - I am no expert, can only go from own experience and advice taken. My boy is now 9mths old - but I can certainly sympathise with own bed, cot, nursery sleeping patterns. Babies will, of course, settle with you, on you, or your partner because of your heart-beat. One suggestion is to put a gentle ticking clock near to thier cot or in their nursery to re-settle them after a feed. It worked for us. Jacob has slept through the night from 5months. Yippee.
13/08/2007 at 20:32
you are so brave doing public breastfeeding. I am only just reaching the stage where I don't pretty much have to strip to the waist so haven't dared yet. it's just easier to take a bottle out with me or else to nash home.

On the sleeping front, Louise sleeps in a wee crib next to our bed. She will have to move to a cot soon because she's ridiculously long and it is almost outgrown already. Ditto the pram which is a pest. i totally know what you mean about a rod for your own back Janie, we keep picking Lou up whenever she squawks and then we shoogle her back to sleep and I'm convinced that in two months time I am going to be pacing the floor with a great big lump of baby in my arms desperately trying to get her to sleep. however, at 4am when you are trying to go back to bed you just do whatever it takes!

Today Lou was in one of those moods where she's ridiculously tired but won't sleep. she slept most of yesterday and still slept through til 5am this morning then went back down afterwards and slept til 9.40 but I reckon she's only had the odd 15 minute snatch since then. Every single time I tried to eat something she would wake. She'd be sound asleep in my arms for about ten mins and I'd try to put her in her crib and ping eyes were open again. now her eyes are drooping but she still refuses to sleep.

Cracking nappy issues today too. took nappy off and thought she can have a wee kick about for two minutes and then next thing there was poo everywhere and as I frantically mopped it up she decided to pee. Just grabbed her and dunked her in the bath!

Oh well, my peace is nearly over. Andy took Louise down to grandmas so that I could get a wee break but he's just back judging by the clunks downstairs. Or else am being broken into!

Catch you all soon. Oh and yes, Hetty, hats off to you managing with two. I simply cannot imagine how hard it is.
13/08/2007 at 23:32
Hello all - loads of posts since I last managed to get on here! You are all doing great: Janie, don't know how you survived the outlaws' visit! I was so emotional initially after Kit was born that any kind of upset would have tipped me right over the edge. As it was, my inlaws were fab - MIL is an ex-midwife and was so horrified that, having been discharged from hospital on Friday I had not had a home visit by Monday, she insisted that they came down (from Wales!) and looked after me. They stayed in a hotel so that hubby and I still had time to ourselves to get used to being a family, and they were so wonderful and supportive I don't think I'd have got through without them. My mum was around too but she really came into her own when hubby went back to work as she took that week off work to help me out. I was a bit scared when I first had to 'fly solo' as I'd had help for the first four weeks of Kit's life and it was a bit daunting having to go it alone. But I was also actually quite glad to crack on with things in my own way - it's the only way to build confidence I reckon.

Kit slept in the carrycot attachment of his buggy on a Moses basket stand in our room for the first 7 weeks. We never took him into bed with us. For the night feeds, whoever was 'on duty' would take him into his own room to change/feed him, then put him back into the carrycot afterwards. This was mainly so both hubby and I could get some decent sleep on alternate nights. Perhaps because I'm tiny and Kit was a big baby and maybe felt very confined inside me, he has always hated being in a confined space, so he soon found his carrycot too narrow for his outstretched arms and would claw the sides. We moved him into his big cot in his own room at 8 weeks and he's slept there ever since. He's definitely slept better since we did that - and so have we! He first slept through the night without needing a 3-4am feed at 10 weeks and as soon as he did that, we stopped feeding him in the night. If he woke up we would settle him back to sleep with a dummy or by patting/stroking. We did have a bit of a bad patch when he was about 4 months where he woke every hour of the night for about four nights, but I tried some mild controlled crying during the day naps at that time and he learned quickly how to settle himself back to sleep. Since then he's slept brilliantly at night and goes from 11pm when we give him his last feed to about 6:45am - although he's just started waking round 6am in the last week or so. He's quite happy to lie in his cot and play with his teddies, but he's SO vocal he invariably wakes us up! Hopefully he'll start waking later again once we start him on solids in the next couple of weeks.

Have had a nightmare with feeding him over the last couple of days. He simply refuses the bottle and gets himself into a complete state. He opens his mouth to take the bottle as though he's hungry, then as soon as he's sucked for about a second he jerks his head back to get away from it. I'm thinking it's possibly teething and his gums are sore - tried rubbing some Bonjela on about 10 minutes before his feed which seems to have helped slightly, but today he only took 32oz of formula in total whereas he's been having up to 38oz quite happily last week. As long as things improve in the next day or so I'm sure he'll be OK but any longer and I'd be worried about him starting to lose weight. Poor little chap - he's normally so good.

EF, LOL at your poo story! The very first bath we gave Kit after we brought him home from hospital, he pooed in the towel! He's never done so since although he's peed over me several times! (And all down the wardrobe door, all over the floor, all over my mum's lounge floor ...)
14/08/2007 at 08:55
14/08/2007 at 10:59
Wow, big posts, it's good to have a real catch-up!

Minks - your routine sounds great, lots of sleep for you now! I know what you mean about that 'arms outstretched' thing, when Hector has the space, both arms are out to the side and legs splayed all over...he looks so chilled! Regarding the gums, a friend used a homeopathic remedy for teething and said it really helped. I'm not entirely sure what it was, but it was in little sachets of powder that you pour on their tongue, possibly chamomile?

EF - I am seriously thinking of getting one of these. I had a 'too public' experience at the weekend when we met up with my husband's cousin. We were in a cafe and it was a bit cramped, so I really couldn't get myself into a good position to be 'discreet' and ended up flashing my muffin top and jelly belly to all - there was a couple at a nearby table giving me filthy looks and muttering to each other :( I think the vest would at least give a bit of coverage under a baggy top.

Oh yes, the poo sounds familiar - just be happy you've got a girl, boys can cover quite an area with their little fountain of wee!!

For the past couple of days Hector has been having more awake time during the day, where he's truly delightful, gurgling to himself, chattering away to the yucca plant and enjoying playing, and my terrible singing (I have to make up the words because I never remember them). Maybe he will make a shift to longer sleeping sessions at night takes time I suppose.
14/08/2007 at 12:54
LOL! There's some really funny stories today. EF I know the feeling with the wee and poo - apparently my sister once managed that all over the sofa!!! I also know exactly what you mean about trying to get the baby to sleep at 4am. I tried rubbing Ted's tummy last night and sitting by him in the moses basket last night instead. That seemed to work. Apparently it's a good half-way house to wean a baby off being nursed to sleep. May be worth a try for you too?

AP completely agree with little boys and their 'fountains'... I think Ted is already in practice for the school toilets...

Breastfeeding, have to admit every time I try to feed in a semi-public place (bumps and babes or a friends house) I seem to end up with both boobs out as Ted won't settle properly. Think I should probably consider some feeding tops there's quite a few available here too. I have every respect now for the mum who managed to feed on the front row of my presentation at school in June and didn't expose herself!

Minks you are so lucky to have such supportive inlaws. I too can't believe that you didn't get a visit from your mw for so long, that's terrible. I only got signed off last week and had another visit from the HV today. Thanks for the advice re sleeping though.

Well Ted is 4 weeks old and 8lb 3oz. Can't believe time is going so quickly and he is growing so fast. He's gaining at least an ounce a day if not more so really gaining weight well. I now understand what everyone was saying about babies growing too soon...
14/08/2007 at 12:59
Hello guys. Mammoth posts as usual!! JT your in-laws sound positively hideous and I think you deserve a medal to get through it. Not what you need when your hormones are still up and down and you're still trying to get life balanced!

B/feeding in public - not an easy one. I used to dread it if I had to do it as my milk used to pour out and choke both of mine. Things that made it easier were zip front sweatshirts/cardigans and then I used to wear two vest-tops - one I could hitch up and the other I could pull the neckline down (basically the larger-size tops I had in pregnancy that had lots of stretch!!). This saved some kind of modesty as my boob would then peek out from the gap and be covered by baby! Plus if one got soaked then the other one might survive and be wearable.

Can totally sympathise with the pooing dramas. I leave Scarlett on a big old towel (doubled up) now when I do this. However, that still doesn't stop her smearing it all over her feet etc... Straight in the bath then.

Sleeping is a difficult one as everyone has their own views on what they want to do. We put Joshua and Scarlett in their own rooms fairly quickly as they were both incredibly noisy in their sleep and I am a light sleeper. Plus, their rooms are literally just across the hall from ours and your senses are super-honed to any kind of noise or squeak out of the ordinary. Both slept in moses basket or carrycot until - as Minks said - they needed more space to spread out. Both of ours slept in a room that also had a single bed in it, so if it was a night where I was up and down all night I'd often fall asleep in the single bed in the same room so hubbie got some sleep and could function at work the next day! We've been pretty discliplined with both ours on the leaving them to settle front - once you're happy they have been fed etc it does get easier to leave them to it. As I say, everyone has their own ways of doing things but both of mine have thrived on a routine of sorts.

Minks, not sure what to suggest re Kit and his feeding. I've noticed with Scarlett that she is a lot more nosy now and if I am feeding her where anything else is moving around I have to almost chase her with the bottle. I guess it might be teething - I can't remember Joshua being too concerned by a teet but some of those memories are a little blurry now. I'm also now trying her on some baby rice. She's gone from sleeping soundly from 11pm to 7.30pm to waking up at 5.30 absolutely starving! I had hoped to go a bit longer but it's obviously not to be and the health visitor was totally happy with this when I had her weighed yesterday (14lbs now at 20 weeks and really quite chubby). Have you been on your hen day/wedding yet? The outfits sounded lovely.

Anyway, time to sort lunch for Joshua and I. It sounds like all you mums are doing great. I think having children is one of the hardest (and most rewarding) things I have ever done. And the learning curve is VERY steep.
14/08/2007 at 16:22
Oh dear. Just back from our six week check at the GP...rubbish. I felt like she was just going through the motions, simply ticking off a list of requirements, she seemed so uninterested. I'm glad I didn't have any real concerns because I don't know if I would have felt able to raise them with her :(

At the end I was thinking 'is this it?' and had to ask her if I was ok to begin exercising again. She said 'yes, you're fine' as if it was a daft question, so I said I thought you had to wait until your six week check and she said 'that's only if you've had a c-section'. She didn't examine me in any way, no BP, no internal or anything. Feel a bit deflated after that. Oh well.
14/08/2007 at 17:19
Oh AP that sounds horrid. I'm kind of glad that I don't have to have a six week check if that's what they're like. Spoke to HV re exercising today, she said if I was desperate to start now then to go and get checked with the GP but if I was happy to leave it until 6 weeks then I should be ok by then.

EF - think you raised a feeding issue with lop sided boobs? I've been having a similar problem and she told me to try and express twice a day from my lazy boob but not to worry unduly, sometimes that's the way it goes. Thankfully I'm not lop sided, just don't produce as much from the left as the right - sorry if that's tmi!

CC - Some fab advice there, especially re how to dress in public for b/feeding! Will definitely try that. I actually have one b/f vest, but it's a little small, with a jacket over though it should be fine.

HV very pleased with Ted today, he's now 8lb 3 1/2oz (don't forget the half ;0)) so is putting over an ounce a day. Jon is at home this week again which is fab, really nice to spend some quality and chill out time together as a family.
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