Pregnant runners' club

for anyone who's expecting...

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13/02/2006 at 09:09
mmj - glad you got out for a run, but sorry about your liver :-(. if it's not one thing, it's another.

all this talk of size 10 jeans makes me very depressed. i'd never fit into a size 10 normally anyway!

marijke - elliptical trainers are like those nordic ski machines you get in the gym.

all ok here. did no running at the weekend because i'm feeling so tired, and also my back has been aching. but i did a mile in the pool this morning and back is feeling better today so may go for a short plod later today.
13/02/2006 at 09:17
I agree with Caramel about the talk of size 10's, never fitted into a size 10 in my life, i was a 14/16, but since christmas, definetly a 16 now. Can i moan a bit about bras as well, looking at myself in a mirror (with clothes on) i wouldn't say i look like i have huge boobs and there must be plenty women out there about the same size as me, so why are there so few bigger sizes in nice styles, especially in department stores, even though i'm only about six weeks, my boobs are starting to expand already and have gone from an E to almost a FF, but couldn't find anything nice in the shops above a F. The books say that you're boobs tend to grow over the first 3 months then don't grow much after then till you actually give birth and the milk comes in, is this true ? I dread to think what size i could end up by then !!!
13/02/2006 at 09:50
p.s. does your chest size (i.e. 34, 36 etc)go up as well as your cup size ???
13/02/2006 at 10:15
Mrs O - I reckon it has a lot to do with your natural body shape - my boobs didn't get much bigger while I was pregnant(went from 34b to 34c) but went up to an impressive 34e when my milk came in!
Fortunately one of my friends had warned me about the "porn star" boobs - it was amazing ;o) I did also go up around the ribs to a 36 when my baby was breech (he decided to go breech at 30 weeks for some weird reason and then turned back at 32 weeks) - this was because his head and back were pushing against my ribs and expanding them - very uncomfortable indeed.
I have also noticed that all of my friends who had baby girls got considerably bigger boobs during pregnancy than those of us who had boys....

Sorry to hear that so many of you have had bad days lately - I guess it's one of those things & hopefully you'll all have a better week :o)

Caramel - do let us know if you find out the flavour - my little monkey had the cord between his legs at 20 weeks so they "guessed" and then I had it confirmed 2 weeks later (I had scans all the time because of my blood pressure problems).

Hegs x
13/02/2006 at 10:36
mrs o - my boobs feel humongous! they started off about a 34B/C; and have only actually gone up to a 38C, even though actually my boobs feel huge, heavy and about to explode. so my chest has 'expanded' but my cup size hasn't - and i got myself measured properly as well, rather than just guessing, which is what i normally do.

i hate to imagine even huger boobs! i've always been relatively small up top, and can't bear the thought of giant boobs getting in the way all the time. it's bad enough as it is now! and trying to run as well??!? marijke - you have my sympathies!!

hegs - went to get my hair cut at the weekend (it's growing like mad!!), and the hairdresser reckoned i was having a boy because i'm still nauseous. given that my husband and i can't agree on any girls names at all, i reckon that means we're having a girl, though!

i'm not setting my hopes on finding out the sex tomorrow, so if they can't tell, i won't be too upset. i'm just focussing on that for the moment, because it's better to think 'ooo, i might find out the sex' than 'ooo, i might find out it has an abnormality!'.

i think my mother-in-law will be frantic if they can't tell the sex and try and pay for a private sexing scan or something. she's getting so hyped up about the whole thing (it's her first grandchild). had her on the phone yesterday about turning some brand new single sheets she found in her cupboard into sheets for the baby's cot and using pillow cases to slip the carry cot mattress inside! i suppose it's better than her knitting yellow cardis, which is what she has spent her time doing so far. but i'd actually rather go out and buy some 'proper' ones (isn't that awful of me?!)
13/02/2006 at 10:57
Caramel - my mother-in-law made about 20 sheets for the crib and the cot and I have to admit that I haven't used any of them! I bought fitted crib & cot sheets from Mothercare and have used sleeping bags since my little boy was about 8 weeks old (I have this complete paranoia about cot death, as I am sure do lots of other mums, and I decided that a sleeping bag was less likely to end up over his face than sheets and blankets etc). Also, as my little one was born in May it was far too warm for all that too.
My mother-in-law also had two dodgy paintings done for him - one of a blue pram and one of a car - both with name, date of birth etc on them, but on one she got his name wrong! (And not just the spelling, but the actual name!) What was all that about, do you reckon??
She actually still hasn't got over the fact that I had a boy - he is her 3rd grandson and she desperately wanted me to have a girl!
Re: finding out the sex - my in-laws were vehemently against it ha, ha, ha ;o)

Hegs x
13/02/2006 at 11:15
Glad to hear most of you are doing well, i am just waiting for my early scan next week (which should be just over 7 weeks i think) to make sure everything is looking ok. Since i've been on fertility treatment the clinic gives me a 7 week scan and then after that i am hopefully just like any normal pregnant woman and go off to my GP. Not really experiencing any morning sickness yet, wouldn't say i feel sick, but my stomach definetly feels a bit off.
13/02/2006 at 11:18
mrs o - I had a 7 week scan - it's quite amazing - the baby looks like a little flashing beetle!
Have they told you yet how they are going to do it? I had the "transvaginal" scan - not entirely pleasant (but not too bad either), but a far better view of what's going on at such an early stage apparently!

Good luck x
13/02/2006 at 11:34
Yeah, i get a trans vaginal scan, but am well used to them. I was getting internal scans about 2 or 3 times a week when i was getting treatments (so off and on since september last year). Just anxious to get this one past and make sure everything is ok and in the right place as i just heard from a friend this weekend, her sister suffered an ectopic preganacy last week and lost one of her tubes as well and i think it was pretty serious and she was perhaps lucky not to have lost her life. Anyway these things are rare and i know she is completely devastated, but not the things you want to be hearing about when you're a first time paranoid pregnant woman !!! Eager for my scan, its not till next wednesday and we will hopefully find out everything is ok, also i had one nice big mature follice and one smaller one that the doc thought could pop as well, so there is a chance that there may be more than one in there !!!!
13/02/2006 at 12:07
oooo mrs o. how cool would it be if there were 2 in there?! wow! that would be hard work!

haven't heard back from turtle since her dating scan. hope she's ok...

hegs - funny you should say that about the sheets, because i was also thinking i'd want to put junior in sleeping bags (not least because our house is BOILING in the summer and FREEZING in the winter, so the additional layers in the winter will be very useful).

and yes, i'm also totally paranoid about the cot death thing. m-i-law was trying to say we didn't need a crib, we could just use moses basket. but i've decided to get a crib because i want the option of having junior in with us until its 6 months old (as long as it doesn't snort too loudly!), and i don't think a cot will fit in our room once it grows out of the moses basket but a crib definitely will. m-i-l couldn't understand why i'd want the baby in the room with me. i tried to tell her it was what they recommended these days, but she just said 'well we didn't do that and all ours were fine'. it's like 'yes, well, but advice changes'. i guess it's hard to accept if you've done it a particular way and it's been fine. but i hope we're not going to have too many things like this because i get on really well with her, and i don't want it spoiled by her thinking that i don't want her advice. (and actually, i feel like i probably don't at the moment!)

fortunately my mum hates children, is convinced that i will make a dreadful mother and that she will make a dreadful grandmother, so the pressure is off. it's very helpful that she expects me to fail as a mother because if i do, she won't be surprised, and if i don't, she'll be pleasantly surprised!

i don't think i could do with pressure from both mother and mother-in-law! neither of them live anywhere near us either, so pressure is likely to be predominantly via telephone anyway!
13/02/2006 at 12:56
mrs o - forgot that you'd been having treatment - you're well used to the "magic wand" then ;o)
I had a 7 week scan since my pregnancy was somewhat unexpected and multiple births run in my family - oh the relief that there was only one in there!

Caramel - I do actually get on really well with my m-i-l but I guess we're just very different.... She lives 300 miles away which probably helps our relationship anyway. I am lucky in that my parents are local and I am very close to them - my son is their first grandchild & they ADORE him! I keep having to ask mum not to spoil him all the time (she cuddles him non-stop) as when I have him at home he whinges if I put him down or go out of sight for a moment! Shame that your mum feels as she does, but I guess you are used to her views and won't let it affect you negatively. Interestingly my mum (I quote) had to "lie down in a darkened room for an hour" when she found out she was going to be a Granny - it made her feel old ;o) She totally loves it now though.

Re: having baby in your room - I was adamant that we were going to have our little chappie in with us, but not only does he toss and turn and make a load of other noises, he also snores like a boar:o) As a result he didn't last long in our room! Plus I have to get up at 5.30am to go to work and he doesn't take kindly to having his beauty sleep interrupted...

13/02/2006 at 13:18
yes, i'm very used to my mum's views. her initial reaction on hearing i was pregnant was 'i wonder whether i'll be as terrible a grandmother as i was a mother'. my answer to that was 'well, that would be hard!' she suffered terribly from post-natal depression and has suffered from depression probably for most of her life, although neither the PND or her depression were diagnosed until i was in my late teens. she didn't enjoy my childhood one bit, kept leaving home every few months (but always came back again eventually), and we really only started getting on once i left home and wasn't dependent on her.

i love her to bits and i know she loves me as well. but i'm not surprised that she's apprehensive about a grandchild, and because she and i never had a normal relationship, and she didn't have a relationship at all with her mum, she has no positive experiences of her own on which she can build. i'm very different from her though, and i'm nowhere near as concerned as she is about whether i'll cope. i have no option really. i'll have to! and if i don't, then at least help is more accessible and available these days than it was when i was born.

and there's always gin ;-)
13/02/2006 at 13:29
That is so sad. I realise how lucky I am with my relationship with my mum - she's been fantastic. I had some quite good counselling from my local health service after my son was born due to my traumatic pregnancy and the fact that my son was in special care for a week after he was born (apparently evidence suggests that people with difficult pregnancies are more likely to suffer PND and they thought the enforced separation after birth may affect the bonding process) but I quickly realised that I had no issues at all on that front and was not the slightest bit depressed either (other than normal baby blues). It must be absolutely awful though for those who do suffer - my heart goes out to your poor mum.
Do make sure that you ask for help if you need it, and I hope that Mr Caramel will be extra-supportive.

And absolutely is there gin - I have most definitely "enjoyed" a drink or two since my little angel put in his appearance ;o)
13/02/2006 at 14:17
Hegs - thanks.

I'm well and truly over all the negative feelings I used to have about my mum. For a long time, I was just plain scared of her, particularly when she would just lose it and leave home. But now I understand why she did those things, and that it wasn't her 'fault'. She just couldn't help it and had no way to express how she was feeling.

For so many years, I longed for a 'normal' mum - one who wouldn't scream and shout; one who would let me take friends home; one who reacted normally to requests to take a potato into school for an experiment, for instance! But I wouldn't actually change a thing about my mum even if I could now. She's a funny old thing in many ways (and not actually that old, either!), but her heart is absolutely in the right place. And I have learnt a LOT about myself and relationships and how fragile things can become since we started to sort things out.

And she's now so much better, even though she still suffers from clinical depression. Her glass will always be half empty (at least!), hence comments like me being destined to be a terrible mother. But I love her to bits, as does my dad.

Mr Caramel is totally wonderful, and very very good at handling me when I have my 'moments'. Although he finds my mum very hard work (and she still can be at times!), he does appreciate that much of it is due to her illness, and I think this has made him aware of how fragile a balance we strike most of the time.

As long as I still let him go running every day, he will do whatever he can to help (as long as it's not tidying up, and as long as I don't actually appear to be nagging! Best to let him think he's had the idea himself!)

It's good that you got offered help, Hegs, and fantastic that you didn't actually need it. It's reassuring to hear that these difficulties are genuinely acknowledged and accepted these days. Many of my mum's insecurities about her parenting abilities stem from the fact that, after I was born, she was made to feel a freak for the fact that she couldn't cope. She used to bang her head against the wall repeatedly until she bled to stop herself from hurting me when I screamed and screamed and screamed (was a very scream-y baby, apparently), and yet she was made to feel it was *her* fault that I cried. She was told it was because I was 'picking up' on her insecurities. Her own mother even got one of my mum's neighbours to call the NSPCC and report my mum's screaming and my crying!

It makes me very sad to think about how my mum had to suffer... Thank God none of us will be subjected to prejudices like that.

Sorry - bit of an off-topic rant.

13/02/2006 at 14:25
Don't apologise - it's important, and makes the rest of us feel very lucky.
I think it's very hard to know what is "normal" after having a baby - we all have days when it is very hard work - when you're tired & the baby cries and cries and you don't know what to do... But it must be even worse when you are ill - I can't begin to imagine it.
My best friend had a baby 3 months before me and I spent the first few weeks of my son's life wondering why he didn't sleep when I wanted him to (and my friend's baby seemed to do exactly what she wanted!) - I now realise that it is simply that they were at different stages and he was too young to fit into a regular sleep pattern. It still made me feel inadequate at the time though!
There is a lot less stigma attached to PND now - 2 girls from my antenatal group have suffered but fortunately not too badly and are fully recovered now which is great news - so, all you preggers ladies, make sure you ask for help if you need it.

'nuff said - now I'll get off my soap box ;o)

Oh and I better do some work today too before I get fired for surfing all day :o)

Hegs x

13/02/2006 at 18:30
Hi All - God there have been a lot of posts over the weekend. I have not been on as I had a major scare over the weekend.

I started bleeding on Friday evening and this continued until Saturday. My 1st pregnancy with Sadie went without a hitch, but I had a miscarriage in July before becoming pregnant this time. So I was very anxious, but was unable to get a scan until today. I was convinced that I had lost the baby, but as the weekend progressed the bleeding subsided. I felt a glimmer of hope, particularly as I still had the foul pregnancy taste in my mouth!

Anyway, I had a scan today and I am so releaved to say the baby is there and alive and well. The bleeding is from outside the sac from my uterine wall. This can happen sometimes for no real reason. Although I feel better knowing all is ok, I think I will obviously stress a lot more this pregnacy!!

I spoke to the doctors about my running and exercsie and the have assured me there is no reason to stop. They said, if a miscarriage is going to occur it will and that my exercise will not affect it. They have told me to go about my everyday life. I would like to but I must say this weekend has scared me a little. I think I need a few days for things to calm down again before I go out.

My husband says I am mad not to when all the medical advice says it is ok. He also says surely they would err on the side of caution. It is hard when you are active to then do nothing. I did not exercise in my 1st and deeply regretted it. I had bad fluid problems and swelled to beach whale proportions.

I think I will come around to it, but growing these babies is a big responsibility. I suppose I have the cross trainer to fall back on.

Glad you are all well.

13/02/2006 at 20:53
Clare - glad all is OK after your scare.

Mrs O - my boobs grew really fast the first 3 months, I'd buy a new bra and find 2 weeks later that I was out of it. I went from a 34C to 38D, then stopped. However a month before I had my baby I then went up to a 40D and then an impressive 42DD (Jordan eat your heart out)when the milk came in.

Caramel - hope all goes well at the scan!
14/02/2006 at 09:13
Just logging on to moan, which is probably a cheek as plenty folk have a lot more to moan about than me, especially the folk on this thread from some of your recent posts, hope you are all well. Just been feeling tired the past couple of days. Although i'm sure i have been sleeping fine, i feel like i haven't, feel like i've had a late night and early morning, whereas i went to bed at 10.30pm and got up at 7am. Am at work and really can't be bothered, just want to go home and have a sleep, i suppose it must be part of the extra tiredness a lot of women expereince in the first trimester.
By the way i keep losing track of who's pregnant, who's not and how far along you all are. I am currently about 6 weeks and, all being well should be due at the start of october.
14/02/2006 at 09:21
Hi Mrs O. I am 12 weeks on Thursday and due on the 31st Aug. Don't feel bad for moaning, the 1st trimester can be hard. There are a lot of changes going on and concerns too.

The tiredness can be a real killer. My was at its peak between 6-8 weeks, where I would slope off to the toilets after lunch and just want to rest my head on the loo roll and sleep! And believe me I could have done!. I will ease and I did find that exerercise helped. Although I literally had to haul my arse out the door. When I got back I would feel invgorated for a bit at least.

Hang on in there your body is very busy at the mo :-)
14/02/2006 at 09:26
yes Clare, thats exactly how i'm feeling. Have been managing to get out running, although running slower than usual, but still getting out as often. Yesterday and today i am really feeling knackered, thankfully there was a new runner out with us yesterday so i just ran with her at a nice gentle pace and did feel better for it for a while but by the time i got home i could honestly have slept for a couple of hours on the sofa !!!
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