At the risk of sounding indelicate, nessie, girls (just like men) should adjust their bits after putting on cycling shorts. Does mean that 'agony of the first pee after a bike ride' thing doesn't happen.
Only way forward for comfort is female-specific cycling shorts (not tri shorts, and no need to bother with vaseline), washed after every wear (hubby can tell some wonderful tales of boils when he didn't do this), no knickers and as for saddle ... well, it's a personal thing, and you will never get if right first time. After much experimentation, I use a men's Selle Gel Oktavia saddle. Personally, I find very narrow saddles more comfortable than wide ones.
And lilac or pink? Hmm, not sure. My new bike is metallic blue/ice white/orange (I chose the colours) and is very pretty without being too girly. Pale colours do show the dirt a lot more, as I've found having a partly-white bike.
amandarunning - I feel sick now ...urgh!