Ironman Lanzarote 2013 (3rd weekend in May?)

Entries Open 19th May 2012?

2,821 to 2,840 of 2,929 messages
29/05/2013 at 07:03

just managed to catch up. The reports are excellent. Well done to everyone, and some tough decisions out there for slag and foggy. Wish Lanza was during school holidays - I would love to go along and support

Bouncing Barlist    pirate
29/05/2013 at 17:04

Ive loved reading all your race reports and had a fantastic time in Lanza J


I have thought long and hard about writing this race report because, having entered so many IM in the past, they all tend to merge into one and I feel I have nothing new to say.  However, IMLanza was a little bit different for me this time.

Build Up

The build up to Lanza had been far from ideal as ive been working long hours away from home and quite a few weekends this year.  I thought id done enough to scrape through but them came an email from WTC acknowledging my failed entry for the Kona Legacy ballot but confirming a place in 2014 providing I finished at Lanzarote ($hit!!!).  Three days later I pulled my shoulder when swimming and it pretty much curtailed any more training, 5 physio sessions later and im in Lanza and feeling a bit sheepish re my prospects.

10 Minute Challenge

The weekends entertainment commenced with the 10 minute challenge.  Much to the amusement of the others around the pool I proceeded to assemble my bike in 10 minutes.  Its seems my bike packing material (what was once wide sheets of thin furniture padding have over the years shredded) apparently looking like toilet paper.

But they are good for padding around the delicate bits of my bike

Bouncing Barlist    pirate
29/05/2013 at 17:04


Lots of good fun and laughs around Club Oceana with the other pirates/supporters, big thanks to OC for giving me a lift to register. Practice 10 min swim on Friday further reinforced more positive thoughts about my arm, better still it didn’t seem that windy around Lanzarote.



I was rudely awoken by the sound of my co-habitee’s alarm and so began the pre-IM ritual which basically consists of a 20 min lie-in before a bowl of Weetabix, a teeth clean, and other bathroom habits.

Decided to man up and start near the front, things were fine until the first turn but the rest of lap 1 was pretty crowded, didn’t manage to string more than 10 clean strokes together.  Lap 2 was better but I was tiring, probably on account of having swam only a handful of times this year.  Came out of the water and turned round to see Pingu & Ferret next to me, exchanged a few works and headed into transition.



Mounted the bike, pedalled a bit, then gazed lovingly at the muffin I had stowed in my bottle cage and therefore ignored the Pirate Posse who were cheering me on at the bike exit.

I knew Lanza bike course (well thought I did), seems ive suffered selective memory loss over the last 6 years as it was hillier than I remember, all those flat sections from 2007 had disappeared?  I think mainly on account that the wind was coming from a different direction.

First pirate I saw on the bike course was Ferret who overtook me briefly, I passed him again on account of probably taking it steadier down the hills.  Around 20 miles my rear derailer wouldn’t move from the 27 ring, rather worried I pulled to a stop and manhandled it across, luckily this problem didn’t repeat itself (that said I spend a lot of time in the 27 over the next few hours)

The course was windy and a little more than id expected, what got me was that it was unrelenting, from 20 miles to the top of Mirador del Rio it was unrelenting.  The final stretches across the top of Haria and the base of Mirador put me a very low place, I came very close to getting off and walking a couple of times.  The only thing that kept me going was having sussed the direction of the wind id convinced myself I only had to get to the top of Mirador then the last 30 miles home would be with the, luckily it was, completely the opposite of 2007 when the last 30 miles was just one long slog.

Others I remember on the bike course were Dermot passing me on the start of Fire Mountain, Symes just before the turn towards Teguise, exchanging places with Ferret a few times before the end and best of all the wonderful Schmunks in Teguise


Bouncing Barlist    pirate
29/05/2013 at 17:04



Id fought hard on the bike to get to transition with 7 hours in the bank to complete the run, I knew I might need it as running not my best discipline.

Plan was to target 1.30’s for each 10k but if possible to bank time on the first two laps in case I had to somehow limp home.  Took me a couple of miles to manage to even shuffle but eventually got into my stride, met plenty of pirates on the run, and all were a welcome sight to help pass the hours id be out there. 

I was especially looking forward to seeing Mouse and Meldy who I knew would be only to pleased to hear those welcoming cries ‘Alan’ ‘Alan’ ‘Alan’ ‘Alan’  Was lovely to see all the other pirates on the run, Hokori, OC & Funkin close who were clearly close to finishing, Cupcake,

Was good to see the other pirates on the course

Finish and beyond
After finishing IMWales last year I knew I was eligible to enter the ballot for a legacy slot at Kona, which I did.  On Brighton Marathon day I found out I was unsuccessful in the 2013 ballot, but my mood was lifted on receipt of an email a couple of days later saying that if I completed my 2013 IM event, entered a 2014 IM event.  Ive now met all the required criteria and providing I enter an Ironman next year will be booking my ticket at the Ironman World Championships 2014 (((((((((((( BEAM ))))))))))))

Commiserations to Slag and Foggy.  Slag – you whupped the ass of IMWales twice and you did the Lanza bike course.  I am sure you will crack it next year!

Foggy – tough times but you did the sensible thing.  No point risking long term damage

I would like to thank the Pirate Posse who shared the week with me at Lanza. It’s easy to dismiss us as a virtual community, but it’s at times like this that real friendships are created and strengthened.

A special thanks to Meldy (Alan!, Alan!, Alan!) for putting up with me during our training rides. 

To everyone out on the course, the camaraderie as we meet makes the day so much more than ‘just an IM’

To COLT – it took me ages to work out why you were supporting us so strongly :/, but thank you

To Holly, Mrs F, Baby Pingu, Shuffle, Mrs Cupcake, and Pop-up Schmunks, thank you for your tireless support on the day.  It’s easy to forget the worry that we put our supporters to on the day and that they are out on the course just as long as we are. To stand for 16+ hours (ok, sub 11 in Mrs F’s case J) shows a friendship that goes far beyond a keyboard and a VDU

So ‘thank you’ everyone and roll on Nice

M...eldy    pirate
29/05/2013 at 17:08

Vote Barlos   

Symes    pirate
29/05/2013 at 17:26


TheEngineer    pirate
29/05/2013 at 17:28

Loved it Barlos. Kona won't know what's hit it 

29/05/2013 at 17:32

Nice one Coach! We'll all be with you, virtually, at Kona, shouting you on!

29/05/2013 at 17:34

Skillz Barley   For me, I have to say one of my favourite bits of the whole day was (and beware, this is a bit soppy) seeing you have your very own Special Person in the form of Pop-up Schmunks cheering you on & gazing up the road for you. It made me very happy. The other awesome bit was hearing about your Kona place, we couldn't be more delighted for you.

Roll on Nice indeed!

29/05/2013 at 17:35

Sod "virtually", PS, I'm saving already 

29/05/2013 at 17:41

great report Barlos and brilliant about your Kona place. Well done

Lee the Pea    pirate
29/05/2013 at 17:41

Fabulous report Barlos, and so happy for you with the Kona place

M...eldy    pirate
29/05/2013 at 17:45

The Ultimate loyalty card scheme 

29/05/2013 at 17:59
M...eldy wrote (see)

Vote Barlos   

Top reporting mate, it was a pleasure to sail with you.


29/05/2013 at 18:22

Fab reports ladies and gents.  It was great to be there and watch you all do so well.  It has inspired me so much that I am into training already for IM Austria next year


Symes    pirate
29/05/2013 at 19:01

Mrs Symes/Cupcake/Buttercupcake here, Just been reading Barleys report and I must say I get so much out of supporting you wonderful people. What a fab holiday I had! Roll on Nice...

Wonder what name my other half will be running as next year?!



funkin-baby    pirate
29/05/2013 at 20:29
Bouncing Barlist wrote (see)

...shows a friendship that goes far beyond a keyboard and a VDU

F*** me Barlos, VDU!  Showing your age eh?

Lovely report.

seren nos    pirate
29/05/2013 at 21:12

So pleased for you Barley

PSC    pirate
29/05/2013 at 21:14

VDU... loving that too.  Barlos you are a legend mate...  With your training/injury most would have seriously considered DNS'ing let along starting at the front!  Dare I say it (and this is meant in a full on man-love sort of way) but you are the mutts-fecking-nuts mate!

VOTE COACH BARLOS indeed. Kona look out!  They might have seen a few super speedy Pirate legends in the past (tugs forlock at Rosie) but you are going to blow them away!

30/05/2013 at 10:57

Fantastic reports, I do not get tired of reading them. It is much more meaningful now that I have a better understanding of what goes on in the day.

So happy for you Barls and I am a bit proud of providing the means to have schmunks there for you at Teguise and other bits on the bike course, due to my Sherpa crew of one, Eduardo! Thanks to him as well

I know I only raced with the cap as pirate kit, well and the lovely tattoos but I support Action for Children and they did not allow me to have the pirate logo and the charity logo on me so for this race I opted for my custom double piece. This made me a bit of an outsider to the Pirate posse but I felt as part of the crew and spent the whole day spotting for you guys. I met PSOF through the RW IMW2012 forum and you will remain a source of inspiration for decades to come.

I am truly sorry my family situation kept me away from spending more quality time with you lot but I am sure there will be plenty of opportunities in the future to get you bored of my obnoxious spanish personality.

See you guys soon!


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