Easy.Does.It


Latest posts by Easy.Does.It

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Giving up the booze

Posted: 09/11/2014 at 11:06

I've seen guys - who just stop drinking and do little else in the way of recovery - have a gambling habit that gets out of hand.  Over-eating is another common one.  One guy I know split with his wife and started womanising; at one stage he had about seven women on the 'go'.  He was 'on the sick', still getting paid from work, and focussed all his attention on meeting women from the internet.  A guy I sponsor is a member of three 12 Step fellowships (Over-eater's Anonymous, Sex-addicts Anonymous, and Alcoholics Anonymous).  Some of the stuff he's told me - and I'm broad minded - even shocked me.  He's a lovely guy though, well educated, charming - Mrs Tosh loves him - but under that friendly exterior lurked a real monster.

My preoccupation - which I'm pleased about - was developing an almost foaming-at-the-mouth interest in spiritual practises.  I've calmed down a bit now, but it took a few years.  I'm planning on being enlightened by Christmas and becoming the first ever Geordie Buddha.  I think that's pretty cool.

Giving up the booze

Posted: 09/11/2014 at 09:37
Runner Jonnie wrote (see)
 i used to blame me acting like a idiot on the booze now i am acting like a negative lazy so and so with no excuse , so i need therapy, running helps loads but keep getting little injuries that set me back and i am starting to feel very frustrated and not a nice person to be around

A.A. refers to the alcoholic who has stopped drinking, but who still demonstrates alcoholic attitudes and behaviours, as a 'dry drunk' (I don't like the phrase myself). Such individuals are said to have sobriety but not recovery. 

Things like depression, anxiety, irritability, anger, restlessness etc are very very common for alkies who 'put the plug in the jug' but do little else in the way of recovery.

The thing is, booze isn't the problem, it's the way we feel sober that's the REAL problem.  We use booze as a solution to treat that problem.

Good luck with the counselling, Jonnie, and trust me, you sound very normal to me.  I really identify with what you're going through.

Giving up the booze

Posted: 20/10/2014 at 19:19

I once bonked on a tough long-run.  It was Summer, hot, and I thought I'd not need any fuel for my run (I thought I was hard hahahaha).  About 12 miles into the run, up a steep hill which goes on forever (it was through the Wye Valley) I felt like I was running through treacle.

I ended up eating what I could find on a sparse roadside blackberry bush, then another mile down the road I ended up in civilisation and there was a plum tree overhanging a garden wall.  I must've eaten about 20 of those plums; they were the sweetest, most loveliest fruit I've ever stolen.  I was a bit worried about the effect they'd have on my bowels with another 5 miles to go to get home, but I couldn't stop myself from eating them.  I was okay though.

Good luck with the December marathon.

Giving up the booze

Posted: 20/10/2014 at 09:58

Jonnie, if you like technical books on marathon training Dr Ben Tan does a good one:

http://www.amazon.co.uk/Run-Your-Life-Ben-Tan-ebook/dp/B00C1CGQBC/ref=sr_1_1?ie=UTF8&qid=1413795434&sr=8-1&keywords=run+for+your+life+ben+tan

It was too geeky (read complicated for my Geordie brain to cope with) for me.  

Giving up the booze

Posted: 20/10/2014 at 09:55

How were you on your long training runs, Jugula?  Did you practise fuelling and hydration then?  Was it warm at Bilbao?

Giving up the booze

Posted: 19/10/2014 at 21:38
Cinders wrote (see)

EDI. Is she going to Uni next year? 

Yes.  We're more scared about it than her.  But I'm also very excited for her too.  It's a mix of feelings I guess.

Jonnie; sorry for reading something there that wasn't there.

Jugula; well done on the 20 years and commiserations on the marathon.  Do you think it was simply a fuelling issue?  If so, a few well timed gels may sort that.  It seems such a shame to have ended  up like that at 23 miles.

Have you another planned?

Giving up the booze

Posted: 18/10/2014 at 18:00
Cinders wrote (see)

Enjoy your morning at Bath Uni EDI.

It was a loooong day.  Scary too.  The idea of my step-daughter (I've been her dad since she was five-years-old) leaving home is just waaaaaaaay-out.

She's dead excited; it's a lovely university (we're going to look at some others) in a beautiful setting.  But it all seems rather strange.

And although I know I shouldn't make this about 'me', but I wonder how her Mum and I will cope when she's gone?  Things will be too quiet.

I don't like change!

Giving up the booze

Posted: 18/10/2014 at 17:55
Runner Jonnie wrote (see)
Hey RC firstly well done on a year off booze secondly my father has never drunk due to migraines but suffered with depression all his life he is now off of anti depressants and is on a spiritual path with Buddhism and alot better these days, are you religious? A faith of some sort may help you, i also need to start meditate as advised by my counciler and have been making inquires

I've been involved with Buddhism for a few years now; I even did a heavily scholastic two-year Foundation of Buddhist Thought course.  It was okay.  I'm an atheist and Buddhism kinda sounds rational to begin with, but dig a little deeper and there's plenty of 'woo woo' stuff in there too.

I don't chuck the baby out with the bath-water though; Buddhism can be extremely psychological too.  Science has investigated many Buddhist practises, such as meditation, and mindfullness is a mainstream psychiatric practise today.

There's a school of thought that alcoholics drink because we have problems with emotional processing.  Booze gives us a sense of ease and comfort.  Spiritual practises - such as mindfulness - can also reduce stress and anxiety (like booze did for us); so it makes perfect sense.  The only downside is that it takes effort and discipline (like running does) to cultivate a meditation practise, but as alcoholics we know where to get that sense of ease and comfort straight away; a bottle.

And much of what A.A. has to offer is like Buddhism.  I mean Buddhism is the Eightfold Path (the Fourth Noble Truth), which essentially breaks down into three areas:

1.  Living an ethical life.

2.  The practise of compassion.

3.  The cultivation of wisdom (not intellectual) by meditation and mindfullness.

All these elements are to be found in the 12 Steps.  I think that your father is spot on with what he's doing.

Giving up the booze

Posted: 18/10/2014 at 17:43
Runner Jonnie wrote (see)

Seriously though, i have never been to a meeting and feel like i should its been 4 months since a last drank to get drunk , 

Hi Jonnie, I'm inferring from your post that you've drank within the past four months.  As far as I'm concerned the whole point of booze is to drink it to get drunk.  I didn't drink it for the taste, I drank it for the effect.

And given my drinking history, I would be stupid to even drink one small beer.  And really, what's one beer going to do for me?  Absolutely nothing.

Can I ask why you drank? 

Giving up the booze

Posted: 18/10/2014 at 07:26

Sounds tough, BWF.  I hope they find out what's up.  Mrs Tosh has had a run of injuries and niggles; first it was a classic case of runner's knee which she saw a physio for - which didn't seem to help much.  Then it was a back problem.  Now it's her calf/achilles tendon.  She jumps to worst case scenario every time which doesn't help her mental state.

Good on you for your service to alkies too.  It's true though, about esteem, if we want self-esteem, we can't think it, we have to take action to get it.  I think it's a bit like wanting to be a runner; we can't be a runner just by thinking about it, reading about it, or simply wanting to be one; we have to take action and actually start running.

The action always comes before the feeling; it doesn't seem to work the other way around.  Another A.A. cliché I like is 'Bring the body and the mind will follow'.  That really works.

I'm off out with my step-daughter this morning to go look at Bath University.  I can't believe she's old enough to go to university next year.  She's currently putting her 'slap' on; she must suspect that boys will be there.  It's nice to be up early, hang-over free, and able to be of service to my family.

1 to 10 of 408

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