Flat Footed

Latest posts by Flat Footed

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Ironman Lanzarote 2016

Posted: 26/05/2016 at 20:07
Nursery - quite possibly yes

Joddly thanks, no headache or dizziness

Ironman Lanzarote 2016

Posted: 26/05/2016 at 18:20

So if anyone has any ideas what happend to my hands i'd be interested please, a few have mentioned possibly Reynards?

Ironman Lanzarote 2016

Posted: 26/05/2016 at 18:17

Heading out onto the run the i knew within the first two miles that i was going to be in trouble, to put it simply, fat lads and hot temps dont mix.I began to suffer with something i have never experinced before and im still trying to work out.

My hands began to swell up and i was unable ti use them or bend my fingers, i took to carrying ice out of the feedstations in each hand and holding my arms above my head for extended periods to relieve the pain and reduce the swelling.   I made it most of the way to airport when MC caught up with me. By now i was walking and generally having a shit time. MC stayed with me and to be fair massively helped me along and we discussed everything from peoples run gait, future Ironman to what we most wanted to eat.

We began a walk run programme and this helped us back to the end of the long route in a fair time.  My feet and my ankles began to swell now and i knew that my feet were in shit order and didnt dare stop to check for fear of not restarting

By now we had seen all the other pirates that had made it onto the run leg. the next two shorter circuits were made so much better by the huge amount of support that we received from groups all the way along the cours, the final 3 miles to the finish were amazing, people sitting in restaurants having dinner began standing, cheering and clapping. People approached us and told us they had waited to watch us go passed for the last time and one group rushed up to us to give us a beer.   One last wave to the pirate massif at Ruta66 and down the finish chute to completer my fifth Ironman.  

What a medal that was, hard earned but worth the pain, i think  

Run leg 6.13

Total time 15.50  

Now whilst i was on the run i became aware that some had missed the bike cut off, others had mechanicals or medical issue, but one perfromance will stay with me for a long while and that was the gutsy performance of Seren to complete the run. When she got off the bike just shy of the cutoff she had about 5 and half hours to complete the run , when i saw her at the 10km mark i honestly didnt think she would do it, over the next few hours i passed her several times on the route, she had her head down and looked in trouble, When i had finished i made it back to the bar with the other pirates at about11.50, ten minutes to cut off, everyone was anxious and looking down the road for her and then over the top of the hill to the left she came, passed us and onto the finish chute. I was totally amazed and so happy for her, that was the balliest piece of Ironman i have every seen.  

The next day the post race pirate party at Ruta66 was amazing despite my wrecked feet i danced and drank with some old and some brilliant new friends. The wrestling conversation with SA was the highlight of the holiday for me.  

So in conclusion, IM Lanzarote was brilliant, My time was an hour slower then i did at IM Wales in 2013 but i do honestly beleive the Wales is a harder race the Lanza. I'm already looking at next years race and have made plans for IM Cairns in 2020, get saving gang.  



Ironman Lanzarote 2016

Posted: 26/05/2016 at 18:16
Grab a beer   My build up to Lanza was not ideal,  training time being lost to having my wisdom teeth out, a vasectomy and getting a kicking at work didnt help but i left for Lanzarote in a happy place   After arriving in Lanza, two thoughts hit me, the first was as my bike box and i were blown across the airport car park, they stories about the wind were not exagerated and the second was in the cab on the way to the apartment, bugger me they have some big hills here. About 14 pints later and a quick running man competion on the dance floor and i'd completly forgotten i had a race to do. Thurday and friday went by with the usual pre race faffing i specialise in and then it was was day.   Up at four am for a simple breakfast and then i walked down to beach with Posh T and Magna Carter, checked my bike and stowed by bags and on to the beach in the dark. I then set about breaking my own pre race record of seven wees in my wetttie whilst meeting up with Silent Assasin, BM, Crooky and the Slag. and the silence, 30 agonissing seconds of it before all hell was unleashed.   Amazingly i found clear water easy to come by and apart from waving at a coupe of divers and seeing a shark (about 3ft) i was out and round the Australian exit feeling good, back in and lap two seemed a lot more busy, more bashing and having to change direction but nothing too bad, all too soon i was dragging my arse out of the water and up the beach to transition. A quick glance at garmin and i was dissapointed with the time but seems i managed to swim 1.6 miles on the first loop with my clear water being a long way of course. Easy change and out on the bike leg   Swim leg 1.18   Riding along at 22mph on a dual carraigeway i was in a happy place and then we turned right...now doing 7mph into a head wind i suddenyl realised the size of the task i had before me. First hill climb out the way and we were treated to a four mile descent at over 40 mph that was fantastic.   I was passed by Posh T, Pudge and Hokori and exchanged abuse with them and then the race started proper at around 50 miles, the climb up the Haria was grim, nothing too steep but it just kept going and going but at the top we were treated to the best descent of my life, amazing hairpin bends, long sweeping corners and i found myself laughing out loud at how much fun it was throwing the bike into the bends.  Onto the Mirador and it was great to be greeted by Schmunkee and Barley here, this gentle climb turned into a real bitch with the steepest part of the day coming just before the summit but at the top the views were amazing. Another great downhill and before i realised i was onto the donkey trail and passing the well lubricated Pirate massif in Ruta66 and into T2   Bike leg 7.31


Ironman Lanzarote 2016

Posted: 26/05/2016 at 03:48
Slim, are you by any chance sponsored by or looking to be sponsored by a milkshake company?

Ironman Lanzarote 2016

Posted: 22/05/2016 at 09:48
Hey all, great day yesterday, loved that bike leg!

Seren - I've seen some some gutsy performances in my time, but that finish takes the biscuit, massive respect girl.

Ironman Lanzarote 2016

Posted: 15/05/2016 at 18:23
Someone ask Button Mushroom about trying to remove his seat post.......

Fantasy cycling 2016

Posted: 10/05/2016 at 20:56
So how's everyone getting on?

Ironman Lanzarote 2016

Posted: 10/05/2016 at 20:55
Forget putting the bike back together Seren, have you seen that due to a rockfall on part of the bike course they have had to re-route it and we now go up the Mirador twice instead of once. Going to be fun!

Ironman Lanzarote 2016

Posted: 08/05/2016 at 21:29
Is it about time we started a little list of race numbers?

Usual rules apply, please don't add anyone without their permission, as some don't like their real name appearing on social media.

Flat Footed 1061
Posh Twat 809
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