Posted: 07/12/2014 at 10:08
Think half the problem is they probably know at the time they r being unreasonable in asking for more attention/appreciation as they can see u r overwhelmed with baby, so they bottle it up and don't talk. Then they behave in a inappropriate way, getting attention elsewhere and then they have guilt that makes them moody and distant. Cos really he just wants the same as u, for u and him to b happy together, it's easier all round and nobody gets hurt that way.
Mr Tangy went throo similar thing when our eldest was younger, fortunately didn't meet anyone as such, but had a drunken snog in a pub after he had bn out to watch his football team win some cup. Was a bad tempered grumpy shite for a wk & a bit and then broke dwn and told me as the guilt was eating him up. Initially I was very upset and spent about 24 hrs crying and soul searching then I phoned my Mum and asked her to take N for the wkend and we went off camping in glencoe. Going for walks, out for dinner, tent got soaked in torrential rain and ended up in a b&b, but we spent time together and had fun and reconnected. And altho we have had rocky patches since it has never got to the point of straying. It all comes dwn to communication. What men should do is ask what they can do to make ur life easier and show u some love and appreciation and then u will actually have some energy and time to do the same back. Instead they back off and leave u to it and resentment builds on both sides. Equally women R not very good at asking for help and delegating and so pile it all on themselves and husband feels excluded and useless. We could all do with a counsellor sitting in the corner of the living room teaching us how to do relationships lol.