to run for causes. However, this year I’m breaking with tradition. Foot and mouth disease has put paid to almost every race in my calendar – except one. The organisers of the Trans 333 have scoured the entire planet for the place that bears the closest

bank your cheque and send off your number without a stamp. It will then turn up two days after the race, plastered with official threats and insults.I also learned that two-lap races are at least twice as hard as one-lap races. In a one-lap race, you

Coventry and Sawley in the best traditions of any lunatic stage race. We were about 35 miles into the Long Day. It was unbelievably hot and I was having trouble keeping up with Cunliffe, Anke Molkenthin (former Marathon des Sables winner) and eventual

.As tradition demanded, the official starter was Monster Raving Loony Party icon Screaming Lord Sutch. His impromptu rock ’n’ roll medley at the post-race party turned out to be his last public performance: he was found dead at his London home a couple of days

the race. Actually, the real reason I pulled out was because I was so busy at work that to bugger off to Africa for 10 days would have been professional suicide.But why let truth spoil a good story?

is hot, the beer is cold and all is well with the world.But imagine if running were not just an unpleasant but psychologically necessary interlude in your self-indulgent day. Imagine doing it for a living.It wouldn’t be a case of, ‘I’m just popping out

’were ’is next door neighbours, like. To make things worse, he were sick on their cat.”“Aye. He ran a crackin’ race next day though. Knocked three seconds of t’ Commonwealth 10,000m record, as I recall.”“Four, actually.”“Ah,” says the angel on my left

. It’s like walking on the moon. Your power-weight ratio has soared to that of the red ant. But beware – so has your calorific intake.The organisers of the Jordan Desert Cup recommend – stipulate, in fact – that you take on 7000 calories a day

"How’s the training going?"It’s the first thing they ask me, nowadays. That’ll teach me to shoot my mouth off in pubs about the Trans 333.Fordham has the right idea. He refuses to disclose whether or not he’s doing a race until he turns up

lake for the 200m Skinny Dip and you got arrested for frightening the Muscovy Ducks?”“Yes, but…”“And what about the time we did the Midsummer Madness race and Roger had six pints of Tanglefoot and a cream tea and we had to carry him over the finish line