37 mistakes runners can’t stop making

In a perfect world, we’d train hard, race smart, recover well, and live a balanced, healthy life. In reality, we fall prey to the same errors over and over. Among them:

1/ Going out too fast
We’re flying! We’re flying! We’re…crashing and burning.

2/ Forgetting the BodyGlide
Innocent bystanders hear the screams when hot shower water hits raw, chafed skin.

3/ Overdressing for a long run
We obsess about the “real-feel” temperature for hours and still end up with three jackets around the waist halfway through a run.

4/ Not warming up
Going straight from commute or desk chair to mile repeats seemed like a good idea. Our legs had different thoughts.

5/ Skipping the stretching and foam-rolling afterward
Then: “I don’t have time before Walking Dead.” The next day: Moves like a zombie from Walking Dead.

6/ That new burrito joint the night before an important workout
I thought there was a toilet around this next corner? Or was it back there?

7/ Forgetting sunscreen in the first race of spring
Burn, baby, burn.

8/ Going out too fast… again
Hitting the wall once just wasn’t enough.

9/ Using negative self-talk
Who needs a mean coach when you can call yourself slow, fat, and stupid?

10/ Running too hard on easy days
If it’s not hurting, you’re not doing it right. Right?

11/ Cramming for a race

Oh, it’s July?  (Looks at calendar.) Marathon’s in September? Sure, that 16-week training plan can squeeze into 8 weeks.

12/ Not charging our phone or GPS watch
Nothing conveys energy like a blank screen.

13/ Pushing through an injury
I’ll just get this one more run in and then I’ll take some extra days off.

14/ Overtraining
If it’s not hurting, you’re not doing it right. Right? Right?

15/ Ignoring the core
Planks. Who needs ’em?

16/ Skipping strength training altogether
I’m a runner. I run. I don’t want to look like Arnold.

17/ Forgetting a post-run snack
The runger is real.

18/ Followed by overeating later in the day
Why am I gaining weight during marathon training?

19/ Going out too fast in an interval workout
Don’t mind us, we’re still working on our pacing…

20/ Running too much, too soon
If it’s not hurting, you’re not doing it right. Right? Right?

21/ Making up missed miles on the weekend
Sure, if I do 10 on Saturday and 12 on Sunday, I can still get to 25 for the week in my training log.

22/ Trying those new shoes/shorts/hat/socks on race day
Forgot to do laundry, so here, do me a favour and rip the tags off of these for me quick…

23/ Spending hours at the race expo
Energy gel samples. Beer samples. Coffee samples. What could possibly go wrong?

24/ Skipping rest days
Rest is for wimps.

25/ Wearing our shoes into the ground
Really, they’re fine. They still look good!

26/ Doubting ourselves
I suddenly have absolutely no memory of the training I did to get here. And therefore, I’m slow, fat, and stupid.

27/ Not taking water on the trail
You mean “stay thirsty” was not meant to be taken literally?

28/ Not practicing our fuelling strategy
Eh, guess I’ll take a gel or two somewhere between miles 5 and 20, no biggie.

29/ Doing group workouts on recovery days
Do stair climbing and burpee competitions qualify as a break from the stress of running?

30/ Always heading out along the same route
Last week I was at 22:38 at this light post and today I’m only at 22:47. Better pick it up.

31/ Comparing ourselves to other runners
My only competition is myself. Oh, and the 5,000 people I follow on Strava.

32/ Buying too-small shoes
Toenails are optional, right?

33/ Poorly timing our pre-race bathroom breaks
“Runners, you have three minutes. Please make your way over to the corrals.”

34/ Being a slave to our training plan
Just because I was up with a vomiting kid all night doesn’t mean I can’t do my miles. Right?

35/ Not sleeping enough
Five hours is only two hours less than seven, which isn’t too bad.

36/ Going out too fast in a long run
Why limit the pain of bonking to race day?

37/ Going out too fast in a race
After all, it’s what we practiced!